SHEEP ARE IN

Thank You...

2009-11-27T18:41:00.000-08:00

...I'm out.

This isn't going to e be a surprise, probably, given that it's been ages since I last posted. I had a blast doing these postings, but after taking a bit of a break I've realized I don't think I want to return to it, at least not right now. As much as I love snarking on things (and I do), I don't really want to be spending so much time in that headspace. I think I would rather spend time celebrating books that I love.

I will be resurfacing in a new blog, I'm sure, and I hope to reconnect with all of you there. The best part of this blog has been reading your comments and your blogs, and it's been so much fun. I just wasn't as ready to commit to it as I thought it was.

Thank you again.

Friends Forever #10: Stacey's Problem

2009-09-29T12:32:00.000-07:00

Tagline: Hang on, Stacey!

Cover: It's Stacey. And she has her fingers over her face, so you know she's stressed.

Plot!: Stacey is concerned because her mom has been down in the dumps...and to make things worse, her dad is getting married! Stacey is concerned about how its making her mom feel, so she does the same old thing of trying to make everyone happy and making no one happy. In the end, she is happy for her father and her mom decides to open a clothing store, which Claudia is super enthused about.

Points of Interest:

Stacey's mom loves anchovies. She wants to put them on the pizza that's she's sharing with Stacey and Claudia, but Stacey is afraid that the anchovy juice will contaminate the rest of the pizza and the anchovies will swim all over the rest of the pizza.
Stacey's mom also reminisces about a time before Stacey was born, when she and Ed happily ate clams at Sheepshead Bay.
Maureen also wants to play Scrabble, and it's like she's never met Claudia before. Maybe Claudia has successfully hidden her word problems from adults? I don't know.
Stacey points out that she and Claudia are only recently close again, after getting into a big thing over a boy - a boy who turned out not to be worth any of it, basically.
Stacey complains that when you're as gorgeous as she is, with blond hair and blue eyes, people have a hard time believing you're also a math genius. Although I don't think that you necessarily have to be a math genius to play Monopoly...it requires a cutting edge, I think, and the ability to see moves ahead.
They end up playing Sorry instead. But Maureen has been distracted by all this Ed talk, so she has a hard time concentrating, and that gives Stacey a chance to talk about the divorce and that she didn't see anything wrong with their marriage but that there were really big loud arguments at the end.
Once the pizza has been cooked, Stacey enthuses that it is delicious, and it's something she can eat, which makes sense in a broader context, but seems strange at her house. Like Maureen usually goes around cooking up nothing but liquid sugar and inserting that into everything she makes.
Stacey meets Ethan at Grand Central so they can catch up on things and so her dad can see them and be disapproving.
She notes that she sees more of her workaholic dad no that he has weekend custody than she did before the divorce.
Chapter 3: Ed and his girlfriend, Samantha, announce that they are getting married, nicely setting up Stacey's Problem.
The wedding is going to be in about a year, because Samantha wants the time to have plan a big ceremony. Naturally, the BSC will be bridesmaids. No, I'm kidding, but can't you just see it?
They eat at a restaurant on top of the world Trade Center. Mentions like that take me right of the book.
Stacey's dad tries to push the responsibility of telling her mom about his remarriage onto Stacey. Samantha tells him to man up, but Stacey still breaks the news first.
By the end of Chapter 4, Stacey's told her mom about the marriage, her mother has talked to both Ed and Samantha, and Stacey and Maureen have cried and said that they're proud of each other. which feels like the end of the book. It could totally have been a short story or something like that.
Oh, never mind. Apparently it's also Mallory's homecoming, or something. That's one thing I've wanted more of - Mallory subplots.
Stacey volunteers to stay home with her Mom, but even as she valiantly gives up going to what is sure to be the party of the year, she's resentful about it. And that means we're going to get another book about Stacey putting everyone else's emotions ahead of her and how stretched out she feels.
Stacey got Mal a bunch of accessories, and one of them is a hemp choker. Hot.
Mallory says that it's great that they've stayed in touch through e-mail. And that might be the most jarring thing about the book to me.
Mallory is disappointed that Jessi is so busy that they can't spend every moment together, setting up the subplot that mirrors the main plot - life goes on.
Byron has stepped up in Mallory's absence to become the new big sibling. And Mallory seems threatened by this.
Claudia and Stacey talk about Claudia dating Alan Gray. Claudia thinks that she's starting to see the real Alan, but Stacey is not convinced. Stay tuned for Friends Forever #12 for more details on that.
Maureen tries to help Claudia by saying that Anne Bancroft married Mel Brooks. Because nothing convinces teens like old movie star references!
Stacey and Claudia think that Maureen is unhappy because Ed is remarrying, so they get some tapes from a dating agency to try to get some dates for her. Do plans like that ever actually succeed?
Mal is still stressing out because her siblings have all moved on since she's been at school.
Ugh. Stacey and Claudia (she called a dating agency and told them she needed some tapes for research for a college class) invite all BSC members over to have a party and see the tapes. They have an incredibly long discussion on baldness that just doesn't make sense for a bunch of 13 year olds.
Mallory gets all hot for a guy grandfather-aged (and he's also on disability).
BUT! It turned out that Maureen got a date all by herself! He's a buyer for a department store or something. But oh no! The date is for Saturday - and Stacey's in Manhattan that day! Oh no!
Chapter 10: Stacey's in Manhattan, but she's thinking about her mom. And her mom hasn't even gone on her date yet. She can't concentrate on anything.It's very much like Stacey's Choice (the time her mom is sick but her dad gets a promotion and she goes but is thinking about Stoneybrook the entire time).
Samantha and Stacey start to bond, but Stacey feels guilty because of her mom.
Oh my LORD. The next day at breakfast, Stacey sees LAINE. And it's all uncomfortable. Stacey calls her "part of my past."
Stacey finally talks to her mom and it turns out the date didn't go very smoothly, and they aren't going to see each other again. Maureen tells Stacey not to rush home on her account, and OF COURSE Stacey rushes home on her account.
Samantha volunteers to drive Stacey home, and they talk on the drive to Connecticut.
It turns out Samantha is also a workaholic, and she's a fashion photographer. Stacey is suitably impressed. Also, I can't believe this hasn't come up before.
Mallory feels distant, and not the good kind of distant. Not that there is any good kind of distant.
Mallory's the president of the Riverbend Internet Club. Dork!
Maureen has made a big decision - she has decided to go back to Spencer. No, not an old boyfriend; her maiden name. And from a feminist note, it's not called a maiden name in the book - it's referred to her 'original name' and her name before she got married.
She's also decided to quit her job and open a clothing store in Stoneybrook. Stacey is thrilled.
The BSC helps her come up with names for the new store. Kristy - Serious Clothing. Claudia - Funky Petunia. Mary Anne - Amazing Grace.
And in the end, to demonstrate how much she's changed (?) Stacey volunteers to eat some anchovies. O...kay.

Final thought: Good luck, Samantha. I think you'll need it.

Special Edition Readers' Request: Shannon's Story

2009-09-26T15:42:00.000-07:00

Tagline: Shannon would never do anything bad...would she?

Cover: This only vaguely happens in the book, but that's better than a lot of the other covers. Shannon looks really short and young in this picture, sweater notwithstanding. Her younger sister in the purple skirt (Maria? Maybe?) looks kind of weathered, and like she has bad skin.

Plot!: Apparently by demand, here's Shannon's Story! Shannon is really looking forward to her school's trip to Paris, to be held during the summer. All she has to do is pass, and she's there! At the same time, she's being overparented by her mother, clearly having some kind of crisis. The news that her mother is going to be a chaperone on the school trip is enough to have Shannon snap and flunk her exam, thereby removing her spot on the trip and relegating her to seven days at home playing mom. In the end she realizes that her mom is lonely and unappreciated, and her mom decides to go back to work. Happy endings all around!

Points of interest:

The Kilbourne sisters play a game called "gross food," but Tiffany doesn't play, which underscores that she's different from the others.
Hmm. Apparently Tiffany has short hair, like their mom, so that's probably her in the purple skirt on the cover.
Prior to doing her homework, Shannon anvilliciously remembers happier times with her parents.
Mrs. Kilbourne is desperate to hang out with her daughters, and it's just so obvious that by page 14, I'm yelling at the book "You need to get a life of your own!"
Blah blah blah, Stoneybrook Day School is sooooooooo cool, it has Astronomy class!
Dr. Patek is the headmaster at SDS and - surprise! - she's a woman.
Page 16: people that don't get a B average overall and an 85 in french can't go on the trip to Paris - foreshadowing!
Greer Carson is one of Shannon's best friends. I guess they couldn't just out and out call her Greer Garson?
Shannon and the others are trying to get "Sabrina," set in Paris, and at least this time there's a reason that they're all excited over an old movie.
Shannon is not very sophisticated about explaining Stacey's diabetes ("yuck!")
They make a really big deal about Richard Spier being strict, but really, in book terms, he's been laid back a lot longer than his strictness.
Is a Dream Machine an alarm clock?
Shannon and her mom get into an argument about salad, but it's not really about salad - it's about their deeper issues. And as much as it sucks that Mrs. Kilbourne is unhappy, it's not cool that she takes her resentments out on Shannon.
Shannon's mom goes out to get groceries, and comes back with mother-daughter dresses. Creepy.
In subplot land, the BSC will not rest until they've taken over Mother's Day and butted in to everyone else's plans.
Shannon's mom comes over to Kristy's and embarrasses her by calling her "Shanny," and the BSC teases her about it, and act like they haven't heard that already. But at least Kristy has, because she heard Max Delaney call her that.
Chapter Six: Shannon's Mom announces she's coming to Paris, too! I don't think anyone saw that one coming!
Heh. Mr. Kilbourne gives Mrs. Kilbourne a Mother's Day present that says "Happy Birthday," because it's a stock present that his secretary probably assembles. They go to lunch anyway, and it's all awkward, exactly like you'd expect.
Chapter Nine: Shannon comes up with the genius plan to purposely tank her wrench exam so that she can't go to Paris. Even originally reading this, I thought this was such a dumb plan.
Shannon is stunned by the change in her mom, who usually treats her like a baby but expects her to take care the rest of the Kilbournes while she's away.
On the last day of school, kids at SDS can wear whatever they want. And they're really excited about it.
Shannon tries to tell herself that she did the right thing, but I still think it's basically the dumbest move ever made in the BSC books - and that includes Dawn's impromptu cross-country flight.
Shannon has groceries delivered, but when it arrives, it's actually Astrid's food, and of course Shannon has told the delivery guy that they needed it to make dinner.
The dog dressing on the cover does happen, but in the book Shannon is against it because it makes Astrid look silly. Thanks, cover artist.
Shannon plays on the Mom team in the Mother-Daughter (or child, I guess, Mother-Child) Krusher's game, and she likes learning that mothers are real people, too. Gasp! If only she had learned that at the beginning of the book - she might be in Paris!
She also realizes that keeping a house running is not stimulating enough for her, and it might not be enough for her mother, either.
Maria is thinking of competing in an Iron Man triathlon. Isn't she, like, eight? Is that even safe?
Mrs. Kilbourne decides that she's going to get a job somewhere. Everyone's problems are solved! Hooray!
Shannon concludes that the trip was just the beginning, and there might be a way to save their family after all. which is good, because I don't think we hear about it ever again.

final thoughts: Shannon is a lot more interesting when we don't know that much about her, I think.

Little Sister #51: Karen's Big Top

2009-09-24T20:13:00.000-07:00

Tagline: Karen is clowning around!

Cover: When I did Mary Anne and Camp BSC, I'd completely forgotten that I had Karen's Big Top, so I decided to do this as a companion to that book. Anyway, here is Karen, and she's dressed like a clown. There's a guy standing underneath the elephant in a way that looks totally unsafe, and the girl juggling rings is either on stilts or has a really short torso.

Plot!: Karen is at circus camp, and makes friends with the performers. She's loving it, or, as the back of the book says, she "has gigundo fun learning all the circus activities." But she can't make her mind up about the activity that she'll do. But then, at the end, she becomes the ringmaster, because she's just that special.

Points of Interest:

Just so you know, the 'f' and 'w' keys aren't working on my keyboard (except now, amazingly enough), so if my phrasing sounds a bit...strange, it's because I'm going out of my way to avoid these letters.
Karen tumbles out of bed, because she's going to Circus Camp in seven days (see my strange phrasing?). Apparently, Mr. Willie and his family are circus folk, and they travel all year but spend July in Stoneybrook.
His real name is B. F. Willie, naturally.
I think that Karen always describes Vietnam as "faraway." Maybe that's how Watson and Elizabeth explained it to her.
Anyway, July is a Big House month. Karen says "Bye, Mommy! See you in August!" I've never really thought about this, but do Karen and Andrew really not see their mom for a whole month? Not even like, a visit, to have lunch or something? Is that more traumatic or something? It just seems like a really long time for a five and a seven year old to be away from their parents (and that goes the same for Watson on Little House months).
For July 4th, Karen's family gets permission to close off their block on July 4th during their barbecue. That seems strange.
After they get home from the fireworks, Kristy pulls all the kids aside and says that since Nannie's birthday is coming up at the end of the month, she thinks they should do something special. She probably counts that as one of her special Great IdeasTM.
On the first day of Circus Camp, Karen meets Laura, Mr. Willie's niece, and Jillian, his granddaughter, and he says that everyone is part of the B.F. Willie family.
Side note: would you let your child go to a circus camp, on the edge of town, with a man named Mr. Willie?
Karen is happy that her pretend husband is in the same group as she is, because she thinks it's good when married people do interesting things together. No, really.
Karen calls Lisa and Seth to tell them about Circus camp, so I guess it's not like she's shut away from them completely.
Apparently David Michael was a Winkie in the "Wizard of Oz." What's that?
Their big idea re: Nannie's birthday is to throw a surprise party. They stayed up all night, but it was worth it!
Andrew's idea of how to surprise Nannie is to tell her to get all dressed up and come to the living room. Charlie thinks it needs to be trickier, so Karen comes up with a plan involving loose elephants. They eventually decide on a party at the bowling alley.
Karen eavesdrops and overhears Nannie telling someone that she hates surprise parties and that the worst thing she can imagine is to have everyone yelling "Surprise!" at her. So Karen wants to tell someone, but she can't tell anyone because she'd get in trouble for eavesdropping.
Karen realizes that she wants to do everything in the Circus, so she can't decide on the one thing that she'll do at the big show.
Would the rest of the family really not know that Nannie doesn't like surprises? Actually, I'm not entirely sure that I buy that she doesn't like surprises.
Karen talks to Nannie and tells her about the surprise, so they decide to fake it, like this is an original thought and not something that hasn't been done a thousand times on various TV shows.
At the party, Karen's new friend Jillian calls Nannie, "Nannie." Would you really call someone else's grandmother by their familiar name, just like that? Maybe, if you're eight.
Karen is sad because she wasted all the practice time dithering about what to do in the Circus. BUT at the last minute, the ringmaster is sick and can't do it, so - da da da DA! - Karen to the rescue! Barf.
Karen realizes that she is really lucky because even though she has to move between the Little House and the Big House, her friend Jillian has to move from show to show, all over the country. Just in time for a sappy ending!

Final Thoughts: I don't think that the person who wrote Mary Anne and Camp BSC actually read this book, because in that one they say that Karen never really went on a REAL high wire, but in this one, yeah, she does. I hate to take Karen's side (and they are obnoxious in Mary Anne and Camp BSC), but this is a real circus camp, and if I went to the BSC Circus after going to Mr. Willie's camp, I'd be disappointed, too.

#86: Mary Anne and Camp BSC

2009-09-22T12:57:00.000-07:00

Tagline: Everyone's a happy camper...except Mary Anne!

Cover: A lantern in a hay-filled barn? That seems very unsafe. Who are the kids on the cover? A Rodowsky, or a Hobart? Karen, I think, and some Pikes? Maybe? And why am I not surprised that they have "Camp BSC" T-Shirts.

Plot!: The BSC decides to run a day camp, of course, because that's what they do. But one of the campers, Alicia Gianelli, is having a hard time being separated from her mom, for some reason. Mary Anne sympathizes, because Richard is away on a business trip and she really misses him, and no one understands. Also, there's a camp revolt, because some campers have been to REAL camps and they're unimpressed by the BSC efforts.

Points of interest:

The book starts with an incredibly laboured 'Pike's Peak/Pikes' Peak' pun at the start at the book. Way to suck us in, AMM.
Ooh, Stacey quit the BSC to be with her "sophisticated" friends. Neither Mary Anne or Mallory want to talk about it, even to mention it by name. I know she as their friend and all, but really, they wouldn't gossip about it even a bit? Well, maybe not these guys, or at least not Mary Anne. And probably not Kristy, who would be steamed at the affront to the club, and Claudia, who was her closest friend. Maybe Dawn?
Richard announces that thanks to a merger at his firm, he's going to be traveling more, starting with a two-week trip to Cincinatti. Sharon is thrilled, because it means that she and the girls can "bach" it, or be 'bachelor girls.' What an old-fashioned term.
Watson is a real, live millionaire, which is a lot more legal than if Elizabeth had married a real, dead millionaire.
The BSC is worried about the two or three week lag between the end of school and the beginning of real camp, so they decide to host a day camp. As you do.
Mary Anne is semi-judgemental about people sleeping late. I would be in bed right now if I wasn't writing this. I love sleeping.
Why are Richard and Sharon always so cool with having dozens of kids on their property? With the barn and everything? Supervised by other children? Me, I would be anticipating dozens of lawsuits.
Kristy decides that the theme of the camp is going to be "Circus," as if it isn't complicated enough.
They don't even try to pretend that the BSC people are graduating out of middle school. It's just "school ended," and they go right back to eighth grade in the fall.
Twenty-two children signed up for BSC camp, including most of the usual BSC Suspects, plus a lot of kids from the Little Sister series.
Mary Anne takes a sidebar to point out that Logan looks really handsome on a bicycle. O...kay?
I'm pretty sure that Alicia Gianelli goes to nursery school with Andrew, so why is she suddenly so shy and nervous and not wanting to leave her mom? Then again, she is four.
They way that Vanessa Pike rhymes EVERYTHING, I'm wondering if maybe she shouldn't go in for some kind of psych consultation.
Oh, apparently this is the longest that Alicia has ever been separated from her mom. Maybe nursery school comes later? I hate being confused by BSC books.
Mary Anne calls Mal unfeeling because Mal thinks that it's a good idea for Alicia to stay at camp and not cry for her mom. I think Mary Anne needs come counselling, too.
Karen has already been to circus camp, along with every other kid from Stoneybrook Academy. So she declares the BSC camp to be 'babyish' and leads a rebellion. Kristy vs. Karen here is aggrevating; Kristy vs. Karen in the future is the stuff of fanfiction.
After getting rid of Richard, Mary Anne starts feeling lonely and weepy. So Sharon suggests a terrible video night, and they pick out Plan Nine from Outer Space, Girls, Girls, Girls, and Buffy the Vampire Slayer.
They watch movies and eat Chinese food and *gasp!* don't clean up the cartons right away. Mary Anne prudes out and goes off to bed, stewing about the fact that Dawn and Sharon are close to each other.
The Camp goes on a day trip to Mrs. Stone's farm, to see Elvira the goat, of course, because a goat is the height of fascination to Stoneybrook (maybe Stacey was right about the club).
Mary Anne says that if she never met Dawn, she never would have discovered three-cheese macaroni, which I call bull on, because macaroni is delicious and anything ith three cheeses in it is not necessarily a health food.
Mary Anne is waxing nostalgic about macaroni because she misses home cooked food and clean dishes. I'm failing to see what the huge problem is, mostly because my natural state is a lot like their 'baching it' state (maybe because I am a bachelor girl?).
Mary Anne even brings up the "Maid Mary Anne" situation where she was being taken advantage of, but, proving that BSC members never learn anything, she doesn't actually SAY anything to Dawn and Sharon, about anything, like, "I really miss my Dad and this has taken me by surprise" or "I feel left out because you and Dawn are so close" or "This was fun for a bit but now I really would like the house to be a little neater" or "I think I need some help."
Claudia deliberately singles out Becca and Carolyn in front of Hannie and Nancy to thank them for being cool kids because they don't complain about the realness of the circus camp. Which seems kind of bitchy and not the mature thing to do.
Mary Anne is surprised by the number of places in Stoneybrook that deliver food. Given that it is allegedly the home of a university, I am not.
When Sharon and Dawn order *gasp!* pizza twice in one week, Mary Anne has. had. enough. She makes herself a hamburger! And cooks it! And participates in a toast, but her heart isn't in it. Take that, freewheeling lifestyle!
Also, two weeks of nothing but delivery food is going to add up, fast. I'm sure the Schafer/Spiers can afford it, but still.
Camp BSC has a campout and they scare the children with a ghost story and Logan jumping out from behind a stall.
Mary Anne starts worrying that a week might not be enough time to get the house in order for her dad. what did Sharon and Dawn do to the house?
Mary Anne is in a bike accident, which is a lot funnier than it should be because when it happens she's too busy shouting "Hooray for the day!" No, seriously.
She ends up with a sprained ankle and tearfully begs her father to come home, which he does not, so Mary Anne ends up feeling even more alienated and alone.
She desperately tries to hold on to Alicia Gianelli (remember that plot?), well past the point where Alicia is ready to join the group and have fun.
Finally, Alicia tells Mary Anne that she's ready to move on, because she was missing all the fun. And that's the lightbulb moment for Mary Anne, who realizes that she was missing out on all the fun Sharon and Dawn were having with movies and take-out food and county fairs and drive-in movies.
The dress rehearsal for the circus is terrible, because all the circus purists basically flaked out in the whole preparation department. But they all magically come together in the end and the circus is a success, and that's good because all the parents and grandparents and siblings came to the show, even if they had to get off work early.
Chapter 15 is all about Richard coming home. He tells Mary Anne to loosen up in the future and talk about her feelings, and Mary Anne promises that she will. Until the next time something bothers her, that is.

Final Thoughts: This is not Mary Anne at her best. And for all of her seeming obliviousness in this book, Sharon seems like a pretty great step-mother.

#61: Jessi and the Awful Secret

2009-09-13T19:55:00.000-07:00

Tagline: Only Jessi knows what's really wrong with Mary.

Cover: Jessi's leg warmers make her loooooong legs look pretty stumpy. The girl in front has lots of attitude...I think she's going to be a star! Also, it is really safe for the kids to be dancing in socks? Bare feet would be better I think? Oh, who knows. Also, Mary isn't even trying to hide the fact that she's pretty zombie-fied.

Plot!: Jessi gets involved with this program to give ballet lessons to underprivileged kids. One of the other students in her ballet class, Mary, is acting strange, and it's because she has anorexia. Jessi is able to get Mme Noelle on her side and convince Mary that she has a problem. Also, Watson gets involved and gives some of the kids scholarships so they continue ballet.

Points to consider:

AMM thanks a doctor in the opening pages, so you know this is a serious book.
Jessica Ramsey is not actually Jessica Romsey, in case you were wondering.
Mary Bramstedt gets a mention on the first page, so you know she's an important character in this serious book. Also: is that a common spelling? The second T seems superfluous.
Jessi's one of the best dancers in the class. But she's not conceited - she's just truthful. She's one of the first ones volunteer for the six week course for the less privileged.
The other is - duh duh duhhhhhhh: Mary.
There's a lot of retread of everything we learned in Jessi and the Dance School Phantom: ballet is competitive, Carrie is as old as the hills, Lisa is only a so-so dancer.
Jessi says that Stacey is just as cool as Claudia, and in some cultures, even cooler.
Kristy is avoiding Shannon because she doesn't have any time to hang out with her. So instead of like, telling Shannon to call some other friends (nicely!), Kristy avoids her. Good thing the BSC sets her straight. A little slow on the Great Idea Machine, Kristy.
Jessi cheers when she hears that she doesn't have to wear her outfit, even though previously she said how happy she was to have to wear it. Maybe she changed her mind.
Apparently, Jazzy Jo Dupre and the Fly Boys is a popular group. Or an amalgam of things that were actually popular.
There's a very, very awkward part where Jessi talks about the 'sorrow' of the underprivileged parents.
Hannie calls the bell captain in 'Let's All Come In' the Bill Capstin. I get like, a four year old saying that, but Hannie seems too old for that. Unless it's a leftover joke from when she WAS four years old.
Shannon comes over to the Papadakises while Kristy is sitting. Can't these girls entertain themselves for an afternoon?
Okay. So remember when Kristy was avoiding Shannon? And decided to tell her to talk to other friends and bother them? So Shannon does, and then Kristy feels left out.
Meanwhile, Jessi is so anxious for outside friends that she even agrees to go eat at Burger King with the other volunteers from the Underprivileged Dance Class.
Jessi wears a neon-green leotard and deep blue work out pants with yellow slouch socks. Hot.
Some of the other volunteers, particularly Raul, jump to the conclusion that because the class isn't like the ones they had when they were little, Mme Dupre is racist and classist and doesn't expect anything from the Underprivileged kids. And while tacit racism is a real thing, I think it has more to do with the structure than actual racism. The volunteers were probably in real long-term classes - this is a six week program, where fun is just as if not more important than the actual skills. Also, this is what, the third class? Just because they're not dancing en pointe yet doesn't mean that they're not learning anything. In my early ballet classes, we did a lot of things like skipping in a circle.
Mary pushes her fast food around, hiding it and making it look like she's eating when she's not. Years after I read this (and other tween books - not that they were called that then) the daughter of a friend of my mom's showed textbook signs of anorexia, as described in these books. Her mom already knew about it but she was doing it anyway - and I had to clue my mom in!
Apparently Jessi has never heard of anorexia...? In the ballet world? Post-Karen Carpenter? Okay.
Stacey reminds us that when she joined the BSC, before she told people about her diabetes, they thought she was anorexic.
Stacey and Sam are in an awkward phase. I really think that they would totally have a fling or something when Stacey is home from university for the summer, when she's a freshman or sophmore and Sam is...well, two years older.
Kristy asks Shannon if she's having problems at home, since she never wants to be there.
I highly doubt that the ballet teachers aren't very aware of what anorexia looks like.
Especially Mme Noelle.
Jessi asks Aunt Cecelia what she would do if she knew that someone else was hurting themselves, and Aunt Cecelia immediately wants to know if it's drugs. I know she gets a bad rap, but I think Aunt Cecelia can be awesome in her own way.
She also calls Jessi Jessi. I thought she made a point of calling her Jessica. Or maybe that's a way of showing she's mellowed.
Aw, Kristy feels left out, and because of that she's acting like a major jerk. It's like the reverse of Kristy and the Snobs!
FINALLY, Jessi mentions to Mme Noelle that she's worried about Mary, and Mme Noelle talks to Mary, and the truth comes out. Why do all of these Jessi ballet stories involve someone quitting ballet?
Watson ends up sponsoring a scholarship for two of the underprivileged kids.
Aw. Jessi has a heart to heart with Martha (one of the kids from the class)'s Mom about being black in ballet that leaves them both feeling hopeful. This series is full of so many cringeworthy moments that I forget there are sort of nice ones, too.
Kristy and Shannon make up, and the kids have their final routine, and the two kids with potential get the Watson and Elizabeth Brewer Dance Scholarships, and Mary, off screen, is allegedly getting help. Everyone wins!

Final thoughts: I've covered book #59, and now #61, so that means I should get to #60 soon! And it's probably one of my top three favourite BSC books and one of the most snarkworthy, so it should be a good time.

Little Sister #90: Karen's Haunted House

2009-09-09T20:02:00.000-07:00

Tagline: It's not supposed to be this scary!

Cover: I should adopt that tagline for this blog. Meanwhile, can we talk about what Hannie's wearing? I don't know what's going on with her jeans. They are super baggy and her crotch is off to one side. And the way the shirt is drawn, it looks like she's pregnant but instead of wearing maternity pants she is just wearing really really big ones that don't fit at all and will likely fall down. Also, Nancy gets to hold on to Karen's hand, but Hannie has to hold on to Karen's coat. I guess we know who's higher up in the friend hierarchy (although, really, Karen has probably known Hannie her whole life and has only known Nancy for a year or two, in actual time).

Plot!: It's Halloween again, and Ms. Colman's class is making a haunted house in Karen's neighbourhood. It's a lot of fun for everyone until Karen starts hearing spooky noises, and that doesn't take much to get Karen's ghost-obsessed mind to run away with her and accuse Drucilla, Morbidda Destiny's granddaughter, of being behind the pranks. In the end, though, it turns out that the noises were made by Charlie and Sam...except one bucket of ashes that is unaccounted for! Spooky!

Points of interest:

Whenever I hear the word spooky, I think of the X-Files. I loved that show.
Karen and Hannie start out the book being Leaf Monsters. Karen points out that she is not normally a leaf monster, but a mild-mannered seven year old. I would never describe Karen as mild-mannered.
Karen wants to be Cinderella for Halloween. Hannie wants to be a butterfly.
Aw, their school has a Halloween parade. We had one of those at my elementary school and it really was a lot of fun. Looking back, it was one of the best educational time-wasters that also did not cost any money.
Druscilla and her mom move back in with Morbidda Destiny, who I guess is Druscilla's mom's mom. Karen is convinced that Druscilla is a witch in training. I have a very clear memory of reading Karen's Little Witch (I think that's its name) at my Grandparents' house, lying in a bunk bed looking at the stickers that came with it.
In one illustration of Hannie, she is wearing a hockey jersey in her classroom.
For no reason at all.
Anyway, conveniently the city owns a house on Karen and Hannie's street that Karen and Hannie already think is haunted, and Hannie's family is going to run a haunted house. Where is the BSC to butt their nose in?
Karen's class signs up to make one of the rooms.
Karen is convinced that Druscilla is a witch in training because she wears all black. Maybe that's just her personal style, like Stephanie from the Sleepover Friends series.
When Karen tells Morbidda Destiny about the haunted house, Morbidda Destiny freaks out and starts yammering about the bats. Apparently that house is a haven for bats, and the haunted house will disturb them. Uh, what was she planning on doing if someone BOUGHT the house?
Also, is Morbidda Destiny's house a mansion like all of the other ones on the block? If so, where did she get all her money?
Charlie and Sam are going through this weird competitive phase where they argue all the time. It's so strange to see people acting like normal teenage siblings.
Addie, who has cerebral palsy (if my memory is correct), is in a wheelchair, and some high school boys carried her wheelchair upstairs. Is that even safe? What if there's an emergency? Couldn't Karen's class get a room on the ground floor?
Ms. Colman has a daughter, Jane, who she brought along to decorating the haunted house. In Karen's Snow Day, she was just getting engaged! Ms. Colman moves fast.
Pest control has determined that the bats are free and full of disease. Well, that's a relief! And I guess they just poop outside, because isn't bat poop really dangerous? And icky?
Watson and Elizabeth decide they will buy bat houses for their yard. Maybe they could get some bat mansions.
Karen flies off the handle at Druscilla, who had the audacity to want to be Cinderella for Halloween, even though Karen ALREADY DECIDED to be Cinderella, and there can only be ONE CINDERELLA in the whole wide world, and Druscilla should have known that even though Karen didn't even TELL HER, EVERYONE should know what Karen is thinking.
Karen becomes convinced that Druscilla is trying to scare her at the haunted house because of the whole costume thing, and because the world revolves around Karen.
Hannie keeps pushing that the real culprit is a ghost.
It turns out that Druscilla wasn't behind the haunting, because she was sick all weekend. Also because she's not really a witch.
Kristy does Karen's hair for Halloween? I have a hard time picturing Kristy doing anyone's hair.
It turns out that Karen is Cinderella AFTER her transformation and Druscilla is Cinderella BEFORE her transformation, so they're not the same after all. Wah-Waaah.
Karen's mom only lets them eat two pieces of candy a day. That seems kind of strict, for Halloween.
It turns out that Sam and Charlie were behind all of the weird noises and pranks at the Haunted House, because they had found hidden passageways and stuff. So it's a happy ending! And Halloween was not ruined for Karen, thank goodness.

Final thought: Halloween is not a holiday that I've ever really been a big fan of, candy and all.

#79: Mary Anne Breaks the Rules

2009-09-06T18:32:00.000-07:00

Tagline: Boyfriends and baby-sitting don't mix!

Cover: Mary Anne is looking her mom-iest with a big oversized sweater and mom jeans, helpfully looking on while the boys play. All she needs is plate of rice krispie squares and a pitcher of Tang. Also, I'm not sure that this would have actually happened, because it's pretty clear that whenever Logan comes over she's inside, playing with the girls. Logan looks decent, if way too old to be 13, but poor, poor Jake Kuhn. He's heftier than I think any boy we've seen on a BSC cover, his tongue is sticking out in concentration, and he can't even button his jacket up properly. Also, that is the most awkward attempt at a soccer ball kick I've ever seen.

Plot!: Mary Anne is sitting for the Kuhns (two girls and big brother Jake) in one of those convenient 'lots of sitting for one family' assignments, and she notices Jake is struggling, in sports and life, and is sad that his dad lives far away. So Mary Anne asks Logan to come by and spend some guy time with Jake, which is great, until Mrs. Kuhn finds out and thinks that Mary Anne has been having her boyfriend over for heavy petting and makeout sessions. Mary Anne inexplicably doesn't tell her the real reason, so Mrs. Kuhn threatens to tell everyone in Stoneybrook. Business is slow and the BSC all turns on Mary Anne, but it turns out Mrs. Kuhn didn't tell anyone, Mary Anne tells her the real reason, and everyone ends up in a good place.

Points of Interest:

Mary Anne starts right away with the foreshadowing: she was happy because not one person was mad at her. Hope she's ready for a whole lot of people to be mad at her!
She calls her look 'Neat Preppy Casual.' Does everyone have to have a look that's so defined?
She also likens her Dad and Sharon's relationship to "Beauty and the Beast." Uh...what? Apparently because Sharon tamed him from being so strict. I...guess?
Page seven: Stacey shares that you "never" get over your parents' divorce. And while this isn't something I know about, at this point her parents have been divorced for, like, a couple months.
There's a lot of talk about how bad it is that Jake's dad moved all the way to Texas. And of course Mary Anne thinks about bicoastal Dawn. But no one ever brings up how Sharon moved to another coast and took her children with her.
Stacey says that Mary Anne is lucky because now she has two parents when she ever only had one. This seems like a really tactless thing to say. What's Mary Anne supposed to say? "Gee, Stacey - one day you could have four! oh, but I'll still only have two, with my mother being dead and all."
Logan offers to strip for the girls (as kind of a joke), and Stacey gets all blushy and stops him. Mary Anne and Mallory, I could see blushing, but Stacey, I'd see her totally encouraging it.
I thought that I had never read this book, but I totally remembered the description of Jessi running toe first.
While Mary Anne is sitting for the Kuhns, Jake comes home after having a fight with Buddy Barrett. He called him Cruddy Carrot and Buddy called Jake Fake Prune. Which is not how I was saying his last name - in my head, I say it like, Kun, but it's more like Koon? Whatever. Where's Claudia with her phonetic spelling when you need her?
The fight was over Cruddy inviting Fake to his mom's wedding, and Fake got upset because he thought Cruddy was rubbing his new stepdad in Fake's face. Which is dumb anyway, because in Here Comes the Bridesmaids, there are no kids at his mom's wedding. This whole convenient fight was for nothing!
While on a date with Logan, they order a pizza that's half mushrooms, half pepperoni and cheese. Not that I don't love both of those things, but it seems weird to have a pizza that's just mushrooms.
While on a date, they talk about the Kuhns. These people are waaaaaay too into these kids (and in this case, these adults) and their lives.
Robert and Stacey crash their date, and Stacey is wearing a black double-breasted tuxedo suit with a satiny white tank top. They'd been to Chez Maurice with another couple, but the other guy ordered sweatbreads and that put a damper on the evening. There are just so many unbelieve things here.
While playing a ball game, Nicky is assigned to be on the red team, and starts freaking out because red is a girl's colour. Maybe some shades of it, and definitely compared to blue, but you see a lot of guys wearing red, don't you?
That segues into a subplot about a haunted house that is way too boring. Some kids want it to be gross, others want it scary, so they make two houses and it's just sooooo boring.
The next time Mary Anne sits for the Kuhns, Logan comes over to play with Jake, as they had discussed on their date.
There is a really long (for a BSC book) that's actually a montage of all of the fun times that Logan and Jake have. And then in that same chapter, Mrs. Kuhn comes home early and busts them. This book has so much filler.
Mary Anne doesn't tell Mrs. Kuhn that Logan came over to help Jake, or that she's noticed Jake is a little down. I know - a BSC member who doesn't get all up in the parent's life! Only this time, it might have been more legitimate than Dawn telling Mrs. Barrett to get her shit together.
Mrs. K calls the BSC and talks to Kristy, who then starts picking on Mary Anne for destroying the club's reputation. And Mrs. Kuhn doesn't even threaten to tell other parents! The BSC just jumps to that all by themselves.
Mary Anne has a dream where Mrs. Kuhn comes after her with an axe. Wow.
UGH. Mary Anne asks if the others are mad at her, and they say they're not mad, exactly, but they are concerned. OMG. These girls turn on each other at the drop of a hat!
There's a description of Shannon "laughing through her nose," derisively. Snob!
The BSC starts freaking out because noone is calling to book babysitters, and it's Halloween. Maybe the parents are taking an interest in their own children for once!
Mrs. Kuhn comes to Mary Anne's house and apologizes to her. And while I sympathize with Mary Anne, I don't actually think Mrs. Kuhn has anything to apologize for. She came home and found her baby-sitter with her boyfriend while the kids were there. It was not something they had talked about, and she gave Mary Anne a chance to explain, and then there was a week that passed, and then when she learned the truth she went right to Mary Anne to discuss the situation. Whatever.
At that day's meeting, all the Stoneybrook parents call to book sitters for trick-or-treating. So they didn't show an interest after all, they just didn't get their act together.
Everything is resolved, and there's still two chapters to go.
Those last two chapters are about the haunted houses, which are both successes, or something. Happy ending!
Okay, I like this part, even though it's totally WTF. Alan Gray helped with the other haunted house, because Vanessa said they needed someone to be gross and disgusting, so Mal said "Call Alan Gray, he's an expert." I like snarky Mal. Also, just imagine how that phone call went.

Final thought: even when Mary Anne does break the rules, it's still kind of lame.

#59: Mallory Hates Boys (And Gym)

2009-08-31T18:18:00.000-07:00

Tagline: Boys and gym. What a disgusting combination!

Cover: Mallory doesn't actually look too bad, as far as covers go. The uniform isn't hideous, and it's baggy, but I remember when that was in. The guys come off less favourably. Who likes short shorts? That guy out in front likes short shorts. The guy in the back is rocking some sort of mullet, and the guy in the back is oddly proportioned.

Plot: Mallory is having trouble with gym class. It's gone co-ed, and she doesn't get along with her gym teacher, and it's all a big mess. But then it turns out that she's good at archery, so everything works out in the end. Meanwhile, all the guys she knows, including her brothers and the guys in her gym class, are acting like jerks.

Points to consider:

Mallory just read about the word 'pandemonium,' and now she has a chance to use it in her daily life! Imagine that!
The rest of the Pikes turn this word into a game: Nicky thinks it's a disease, Claire thinks it's a panda, Vanessa thinks it sounds like dishwashing detergent.
We get another 'Byron-is-different' reminder.
Mrs. Pike asks Mallory to watch Claire while she makes some phone calls. Mallory kind of overreacts and gives us a speech about how her parents take advantage of her. She practically tells her mom to ask her during BSC hours. Also, does Mrs. Pike really need to arrange for care for Claire while she makes some phone calls? Couldn't she just like, I don't know, suggest Claire and Margo play together for while? Or set Claire up with a puzzle or something? It must be an important phone call.
Ben is totally Mark Darcy - he like Mallory just as she is.
Mallory's brothers start pulling pranks and stuff, so they go over to Ben's house, where she eats his chocolate cake. Dirty?
For once, Mallory points out that she and Kristy have the same amount of people in their families but she gets to live in a mansion. Work that indignation, Mallory!
Logan's mom calls to get a sitter from the BSC, and ends up with...Logan.
Mallory wears a one-piece denim jumpsuit to school.
I hated gym, so I kind of sympathize with Mallory. Kind of.
Heh. On her way to join her team, she suddenly becomes really aware of her arms, and isn't sure how to move them. Do you think 30 Rock writers were secret BSC fans?
By the end of Chapter 3, we have our central theme set up: Mallory hates boys. And gym.
Mrs. Newton gets her hair highlighted.
Mallory gets into a battle of wits with Jamie Newton. And loses. Poor Mallory!
Between gym class and babysitting, Mallory starts thinking that all boys are pains. And that's enough for her to come up with a theory - boys are pains.
I hated gym, but I was really good in volleyball. At least at an elementary grade level.
At least Mallory has the presence to realize that in the big picture, none of this matters.
At the next game, Mallory benches herself and refuses to play. So she gets detention. Why don't these girls ever TALK to anyone about their problems? I mean, not that it would do any good in this case, but at least it would mean that she would stop coming up with ridiculous plans.
After acknowledging that Ben, the rest of the Hobarts, and Logan aren't jerks like the rest of the guys she knows, Mallory decides that only guys native to Stoneybrook are pains. But what about Logan's brother? He was described as being a pain, too. This theory has flaws.
And then she decides to blame it all on gym. Does Mallory have this poor of a grip on reality in all of the books she narrates?
Mallory commits mail fraud when the detention notices start coming to her house; she hids them from her parents.
Ms. Walden, the gym teacher, tries to talk to Mallory about her problem with gym, but Mallory decides she'd rather take detention. So Ms. Walden has Mallory wash all of the pinneys. And that's what I remember most from this book.
Stacey comes up with a mathematical way to say that Mallory's theory is full of crap.
People are always shooting people a Look in these books. What's with the random capitalization?
The Pike boys and the Hobart boys (minus Ben) switch places, and Mallory thinks that she'll have a night of peace and quiet. Instead, the boys act wild. There goes your theory, Mal! I can't believe there was a whole book about this.
While over at the Hobarts, Adam discussed the plight of the Zuni people (no, those are not my words), Byron talked about the Pike lending library, and Jordan played piano, and Nicky loved Mr. Hobart's slideshow of Australia. I wish we'd seen those chapters.
Mallory goes to Ms. Walden and asks for extra help in gym. Ms. Walden shoots her down, because she doesn't want to take anyone out of the game. Why would it be during gym class, though? Couldn't it be like, after school? Couldn't someone like Kristy do it?
Volleyball is over about one class after Mal and Ms. Walden talk. Then it's archery. In the first class, one guy gets his finger sliced open by an arrow...and Mal says she can sympathize, because she's had a paper cut. Uh, what?
SMS has an archery team?
Anyway, Mallory tries out for it and makes it, and when she gets home the Pikes have a cake for her and it says CONGRADULATIONS. And that messed me up on spelling it for a long time.

Final thought: Despite having a lot of the Hobarts, there is a remarkable lack of "Australian" talking (where the writers try to spell out "roit" or "Hoi Melry."

Portrait Collection: Abby's Book

2009-08-30T01:03:00.000-07:00

Tagline: None. It's Portrait Collection book!

Cover: Coincidence that the cover is done in blue and red? Probably, even though that turns out to be significant later in the book. I think the picture of Abby is taken from the Welcome to the BSC, Abby! cover. Oh, wait, no, it's not...it just looks like it was inspired by that. There are some things on here that we know are associated with Abby (the soccer ball, Aretha, Kleenex for her allergies) plus some new things, like a harmonica (I think we know this belonged to her dad), a party noisemaker, a fortune cookie, and crocodile. So let the retconning begin!

Plot!: Abby goes through the 8th Grade SMS rite of passage and writes her autobiography. Her story includes growing up as a twin, her father's death, a vacation with her mom and sister, and moving to Stoneybrook.

Points of Interest:

Abby's alarm wakes her up at 8, and the radio is playing commercials. Assuming her clock is set to the correct time (mine is always fast on purpose), why would the radio be ENDING a set of songs at the hour? And it's for commercials, not like, the news.
Abby calls her autobiography Me, Myself and I: The Autobiography of Abigail Stevenson.
The twins were born about a month early, and their dad almost missed their birth (he was at a meeting in Chicago), arriving just in time to see Anna born. Abby was born 8 minutes later.
All of the pictures of Abby in this book are totally fug, which is sadbecause usuallyAbby looks kind of good on the covers.
One day at the mall they meet another set of twins, but these girls are really old women and they still dress alike and live next to each other. It sounds terrifying.
Did Abby ever sit for the Arnold twins?
When Abby and Anna start school, they are in a class where people are unable to tell them apart. The teacher remains remarkably out of touch and suggests that one twin be in red, and the other dress all in blue. This doesn't work at all, as instead of being called "Abby-Anna" they are now called Red and Blue. They switch places/colours one day, and the teacher has no idea. That seems...kind of unsafe.
That's also a day when their Dad comes to school, and he doesn't appear to notice the switch, calling Abby "Anna." Abby is rocked to her very core, but it turns out that he was only playing along with them, and of course he can tell them apart. Whew. I think I saw a variation of this plot on an old episode of Full House once.
Also, this whole "Abby-Anna" /switching places stuff is very reminiscent of Mallory and the Trouble With Twins.
The part where Abby's dad dies is a lot like "With You and Without You" , except without the horrible advance notice of knowing someone is going to die. I mean, I guess in general it's good to have the chance to say goodbye and put your affairs in order, but it's all just so sad.
Also with added Jewish elements like shiva.
Their mom starts withdrawing from the world, not paying attention to what Abby and Anna are doing or eating. It's very sad.
A while later they go on a trip to Sanibel, in Florida, over New Year's, for a supposed family vacation, but they spend it all separately, and the mom works all the time. This sounds kind of like a retread of Stacey's issues with her father. Maybe Ed McGill and Rachel Stevenson should have hooked up.
The family decides to start new traditions to makeup for the ones that they don't want to do now that their dad/husband has died.
After getting back from the trip, Abby's mom starts working on a mysterious project with a renewed zeal. It turns out to be a move to Stoneybrook! Hurrah!
There's a picture of their new Stoneybrook mansion. It looks to be the size of a large airplane hangar. Seriously - I get wanting to move to a good neighbourhood, but why would they choose a house that had five bedrooms? Maybe they're planning for when the grandparents will move in with them.
Their Mom goes through a real pitching fit before they move - none of the furniture from their old place makes the move, and a lot of stuff is given away. It's a wonder that the box of stuff of their father's that they discover in Welcome to the BSC, Abby!.
Abby recounts the story of how they moved in but had no water or power, so moved in with the Brewer-Thomases for the night. Do you think she really picked up on the fact that Kristy liked Anna better or is that just someone trying to work in Kristy and the Dirty Diapers? I think Abby probably knew, she has terrible puns but she does seem to have an understanding of the situation.
Abby's teacher is named Ms. Belcher. What an unfortunate name for a teacher who works with adolescents.
Also, Ms. B. has personalized stationary from SMS. Really? That seems likes like something that could be cut from a public school's budget. Maybe it belongs at a fancy place like Stoneybrook Day or Stoneybrook Academy.
Abby gets an A-on her autobiography, which she wrote in a weekend. I think she is going to be just fine at university.

Final thought: I have very few Abby books to recap, so that's why I broke out the Portrait collections. I'm not the biggest fan of these books, because, like The Baby-Sitters Remember, they have a way of going back and making up history that usually works contrary to what they've already told us.

#44: Dawn and the Big Sleepover

2009-08-27T16:54:00.000-07:00

Tagline: This was going to be one long night!

Cover: Why the past tense tag line? I have no idea. I've always thought that the curves in Dawn's turtleneck make her look oddly well-developed. I have no idea who any of the kids are supposed to be, except one boy has red hair, so it might be Jackie Rodowsky. I've also always thought that the girl in front had hair that did not match her colouring at all.

Plot!: The Stoneybrook Elementary School kids have Zuni pen pals, kids from a school in New Mexico. Then the Zuni school burns down, and they don't know what to do to help. So Dawn suggests a giant sleepover, that the BSC runs, of course. And it saves the day, or something.

Points to Consider:

I never had a penpal. Once we randomly wrote to elementary schools as a class project, but no one wrote me back.
The penpals send their school pictures to the Stoneybrook kids. Adam is disappointed because his penpal, Conrad, doesn't look enough like an "Indian." He expected warpaint and headdresses.
Byron is crushed because Jordan used pig latin - their secret language! - with his penpal.
Dawn is practically gushing over Mal, saying how smart and creative and uh, practical she is.
You might be shocked: Sharon Porter Schafer Spier is NOT Julia Child.
Dawn wants a Zuni pen pal, but she doesn't have one, so she's sad. Then Mary Anne suggests writing to the elementary school and asking about a middle school writing exchange, and Dawn reacts like it's the greatest idea in the history of the world. No, Dawn, just the most obvious.
No, Dawn. Orange stirrup pants do not look "totally cool" on ANYBODY.
But wait. Dawn, who was so upset that she didn't have a penpal that Mary Anne immediately started asking her what was wrong, then "sort of forgot about it."
Claudia is dressed like Pebbles Flinstone.
Maybe it's just the books I've been reading lately, but there are an awful lot of times when some of the girls are at a meeting and they start giggling about something and then someone walks in and says "What's so funny?" and they all start laughing again, usually with food in their mouth. It's just so FUN being a member of the BSC.
The Zuni school was destroyed in a fire. It was next to a gas station and it exploded and the fire spread.
Dawn tells Richard and Sharon about the fire. Richard's reaction: "Maybe they didn't have a good sprinkler system." If this was a fire at a GAS STATION, I don't know what a sprinkler system could have done...?
Ugh. There's this whole thing where Dawn talks about how poor the Zunis are, but still noble. It probably is coming from a genuine place, but the writing in this section is just cringeworthy.
Mary Anne is reading Tiger Eyes. Maybe there should be a new blog, in addition to What Claudia Wore - What the Baby-Sitters Read.
Why is Claudia always put in charge of sign making?
Charlotte is nervous about her house burning down, especially because she doesn't have an aunt to move in with like her pen pal did. She asks Stacey if she could live with her if her house burned down, and Stacey does this weird, "uh, well, that's, uh, that's really unlikely..." Come on, Stacey! She's your almost sister!
This books is really boring, and quite a downer.
Aparently, Ray Stuckey is the class clown in Dawn's homeroom class. He makes fun of Dawn for not answering her name, and then bitches that the BSC gets excused to go to SES for an assembly. So Dawn says, "Eat your heart out, Ray." Ooooh, that's like, the worst thing a teen can say to another teen. Um, what?
Wow...the school secretary has a computer! That's something I was not expecting.
Ah, the days when some random adult could just drive students off-campus without a handful of permission slips.
Woman-in-a-position-of-power alert: The SES principal is a woman.
Everyone acts like Dawn is the second coming for thinking up this great idea, but NOBODY is saying that the emperor has no clothes. Dawn's great idea was a vague "let's do something to send them food and clothes and money." ZOMG - that's...exactly what everyone does when there's a crisis.
There are also Make Way for Ducklings and Freddy the Pig mentions.
The Pikes have a carnival to raise money. The Rodowskys have a yard sale. Both times, BSC members are in charge of it. Where are these people's parents? Is there some kind of underground swingers club that they're all part of? Where's that fanfic?
Kids start donating things that belong to their parents, without asking permission, like book sets, lamps, and fancy suits. Maybe if the parents paid attention once in awhile this wouldn't happen! (Don't worry - I'm not down on all parents. Just the Stoneybrook ones).
Alan Gray apparently has a crush on Kristy. Remember that for when we get to Claudia and the Disaster Date.
It's a big deal that the pizza place doesn't have flour, so they almost have to cancel the order, but then the pizza guy decides to make them with whole wheat flour. I guess that was a big deal back then...?
One of the songs that they play at the sleepover is "Who built the ark? Noah! Noah!" which is strangely religious for a public elementary school sleepover.
A second Robert McCloskey book is mentioned - what are you doing, Lerangis?
Ms. Besser asks the BSC to stay exactly the same age for a few years (until she has kids to be babysat). Hahahah...ha.
I don't even want to think of how much it cost to send all of this stuff to the Zunis. Oh, remember the Zunis? The ones whose school burned down? Yeah, we didn't hear too much about them in the middle of the book, as the BSC managed to turn someone else's tragedy into something that was all. about. them.

Final thought: Even though like, no one is voting for more Karen/Little Sister recaps, there will definitely be more coming up, because they're shorter and easier to get through. So y'all have that to look forward to.

Friends Forever #8: Mary Anne's Revenge

2009-08-23T19:30:00.000-07:00

Tagline: Look out, Cokie!

Cover: These photograph covers have been growing on me. This one is someone I could buy as being Mary Anne, except for the long hair (cutting off her hair was one of Mary Anne's most awesome moments and Mary Anne's Makeover is one of my favourites).

Plot!: Mary Anne has broken up with Logan, and she's starting to move on. But Cokie (who is the yearbook editor, and Mary Anne works on features or something) has it in for her, over Logan, I guess, and starts these horrible rumours about Mary Anne being desperate and throwing herself at Logan. Mary Anne stands up to Cokie, and decides to be a new, improved Mary Anne. Also, she and her father have been clashing, because of the fire and the aftermath, but Sharon helps them work it out.

Points of Interest:

Mary Anne is having nightmares about the fire, experiencing that night over and over and waking up convinced that she's IN the fire. That is horrible.
Mary Anne thinks that Cokie is lacking in kindness and decency. Burn!
Rick Chow is the other editor on the yearbook, and Abby and Austin Bentley are working the features with Mary Anne.
Cokie plans to have an expanded "Best and Most" section, the part where people vote for the most likely to whatever. Mary Anne objects, because she wants the space used in other ways. Cokie then turns on her and says she's just upset that she and Logan won't be able to win Best Couple.
Oooh, Mary Anne's dad buys her a bed, and she's upset because she couldn't pick it out, and Richard offers to return it, but she says 'whatever.' Ooh!
I'm still a little shaky in my Friends Forever chronology. Stacey and Claudia suggest each other for flattering categories, like Most Beautiful and Most Stylish and Most Artistic, so they must be on friendly terms. Which is good, because reading the books where they're fighting is not fun.
At one point, Logan comes into the yearbook office to drop off some pictures, and Cokie throws herself at him. After they leave, Mary Anne and Abby proceed to disect some of the situation, and Austin Bentley is like, "Uh, do you want me to leave?" It's actually kind of funny.
Mary Anne gets upset that people treat her like she's an invisible pushover, so she takes it out on Kristy, instead of Cokie. Which...fine. But this is nothing new. It's come up over and over and over. It's why Mary Anne and Logan broke up the first time. It came up in Mary Anne's Makeover. It even dates back to the fourth book. And each time she realizes that she can speak up and still be herself...and then apparently forgets it. I think that's why I found this book so boring: it's stuff we've all seen before. And even the 'Cokie is mean to Mary Anne and then gets a comeuppance.' Been there, done that.
While they're at the movies, Mary Anne and Kristy have a weird conversation about old TV shows being turned into lame movies. What about classic 80s/90s book series? (I kid. The BSC movie is a total fondue of delicious cheese).
Mary Anne and her father have an out-and-out shouting match in front of an historical house tour...or something. This at least is a bit more organic, since we haven't really revisited the Mary Anne/Richard personality dynamic since the first few books of the series.
After overhearing Richard and Sharon discussing her and him calling her his little girl, Mary Anne announces to herself that she's "nobody's little girl." This book could have gone in a COMPLETELY different direction.
Cokie starts a rumour that Mary Anne begged Logan to take her back, but he said no, so she sent him a bazillion emails and desperate messages. Is Logan...really worth all this? By this point in the series he's been portrayed as a controlling dick. Cokie can have him.
Also, I'm still shocked that there is email in the BSC universe.
Mary Anne and Kristy come up with a bunch of lame ways to get revenge on Cokie. I'm not even going to write about them, they're so lame.
Logan and Mary Anne talk about the rumour, and he confesses that he is sort of interested in Dorianne Wallingford. Wasn't she into Pete Black or something, when Stacey was into him? What is with it with Dorianne and the BSC's sloppy seconds?
I'm cringing. Mary Anne tells Cokie, "When they were handing out awful, you were the first in line." I'm cringing! It's so terrible.
Mary Anne, Austin and Abby count the ballots, and Cokie wins everything. Then they realize that their ballots are missing, and that the election was tampered with. They go to Mr. Fiske with their suspicions about it, and there's a new election called. Because the sacred offices of Best and Most require this much scrutiny.
Wasn't there a Dawson's Creek plot about someone rigging the Best Couple election, and Joey and Dawson won when Joey and Pacey were really the couple? or something? Oh my god, I can't believe it's been over ten years since I first watched that show.
Mary Anne joins forces with Cary Retlin in case she seriously needs to wreak havoc over Cokie. As bored as I was by this book, I was really intrigued by this development. I've only read a few books with him in it (Kristy Power and Kristy in Charge are the main ones), but I've really enjoyed him as a character, mostly because he messes with the BSC. I've always seen him as a foil for Kristy, but I actually like him paired with Mary Anne. It's classic good girl/bad boy stuff. Mary Anne and Cary fan fic, please!
Oh, and he gives her a back-up plan: fill out magazine subscription cards with Cokie's address, and hold onto them in case she does something mean, I guess. It's a secret weapon to build up Mary Anne's confidence.
Mary Anne stays at Kristy's past curfew, and when she gets home Richard explodes at her. He grounds her - but Cokie's party is that weekend, and Cokie's already announced that she bets Mary Anne won't show up.
Continuity! Kristy recalls the time that she snuck (or sneaked? Claudia and the Phantom Phone Calls flashback!) out of the house to go to the softball iniation thing in Kristy and the Copycat. Whoever wrote the Friends Forever books was way up on their continuity - such as it can be in a series that has approximately 37 summer vacations.
Mary Anne considers going out her second floor window by climbing a tree. I find that is highly unlikely, because there's no way that Mary Anne (Mary Anne!) hasn't seen Pollyanna.
Abby drinks Mountain Dew.
Mary Anne and Cary dance at Cokie's party. I'm almost squeeing with excitement over this non-couple.
Cokie baits Mary Anne, so she gets up and calls Cokie a bad person with an ugly heart. Or something.
When Mary Anne gets home, she is caught by Richard and Sharon sneaking back into the house. Sharon helps them both realize that neither one can sleep, both are haunted by the fire, and both of them are hurting. Then she tells them that they don't have to do it alone anymore - it's not just the two of them, it's her, too. And it's actually a really nice part.
Mary Anne decides that she's not the new Vengeful Mary Anne, and she's not the old Pushover Mary Anne, but she has changed, and she's a girl who can stand her ground. Yawn.
And now, because you've waited so patiently, here are the winners of the Best and Most:
Claudia wins Best Artist
Abby and Logan win Best Female/Male Athlete
Cary and Alan tied for Wittiest
Emily Bernstein wins Most Likely to Succeed and Most Intelligent
Kristy won Most Likely to be Elected President
Stacey wins Most Likely to be Seen in Beverly Hills

Final Thoughts: Seriously, why am I so into Cary/Mary Anne?

#33: Claudia and the Great Search

2009-08-22T05:36:00.000-07:00

Tagline: Claudia thinks she's adopted, and no one understands.

Cover: I guess that it's like, a rule that practically every cover has to feature baby sitting of some kind, because instead of actually showing Claudia and the Great Search, it's showing her with Emily Michelle. I don't understand why the Brewers would take a couch and place a chair and table in front of it, but I guess when you're rich and you live in - get this - a mansion, you can afford to have impractical furniture. Claudia is rocking a top-pony, but other than that she doesn't look too wild. Big surprise.

Plot!: Claudia starts to believe that she was adopted, and when she can't find any evidence that proves she wasn't, she decides that she was. She looks for her 'birth parents,' but when she tells her parents what she's discovered it turns out she wasn't adopted after all. Meanwhile, she's been helping Emily Michelle with shapes and colours and stuff, because she knows how it is to be behind everyone in terms of learning. Or something. And in minor subplot land, the Papadakis' grandfather has hurt himself so Kristy has a regular job there.

Points of Interest:

Claudia thinks that Peaches and Russ can't have kids. That kind of makes her later miscarriage even sadder.
I don't understand Janine's taking community college courses while she's still in high school. Do those count as, like, real college courses? So, theoretically, she could get her degree really soon after finishing high school? Huh. I wonder where Janine really would go to school.
Claudia gets to leave early because Janine is getting a prestigious award...on a Monday afternoon. Oookay.
Claudia gets really snarky about Janine's friends, wondering if they get dressed in the morning by closing their eyes and reaching into their closet. Which I'm sure many people think that about her. Also, she gets huffy because they're wearing checks with plaids, and I'm SURE there's one time where she says something about how she likes to break fashion rules like that. Gah. Claudia was never one of my favourite characters.
Claudia says that Kristy has never missed a meeting, which is a total lie, because Kristy missed one when Louie was sick.
Kristy says that she has news about Emily Michelle, and Claudia says that they try to keep each other up to date on the kids they sit for. Okay, except it's Kristy's FREAKING SISTER. Why are these girls all so coldly detached?
Apparently "me" (pronounced "meh") is Vietnamese for Mommy.
If Claudia had $250 (Janine's award money amount), she would run to Bellair's Department Store and buy a Day-Glo green sweater with charms knitted into it. I think it's a good thing she does not have the $250.00.
Instead, Janine thinks that she'll put the money towards college. She'd better invest it well, because otherwise $250 will cover about the cost of highlighters for her textbooks.
Claudia decides that she's adopted because there are no baby pictures of her, just her, alone.
Claudia discovers that her mom is certified to teach school in Connecticut.
Ugh. Claudia discovers a locked box in her parents' room, and just knows that her adoption papers are in there, and that's why her parents don't love her as much as Janine. Ugh.
Sam and Charlie went to a play at the high school. Really?
David Michael has a cold, so he talks just like Abby and Hunter Bruno when they have allergies.
OH my Lord. Claudia tells Stacey that she thinks she's adopted, and Stacey's advice? Seach for her birth parents. Not anything reasonable, like talk to your parents.
Argh. Dawn gets upset when Emily Michelle puts something in her mouth, and then starts to compare her to other kids they know, like Gabbie Perkins (robo-tot who plays on a FREAKING softball team!) and Marnie, who, really, is not that much more advanced than Emily.
And then Kristy talks about how Emily is different from Karen, Andrew, and David Michael. Okay, except they did not GROW UP IN AN ORPHANAGE UNTIL THEY WERE TWO. The first years, the first year especially, are HUGELY important for babies' development, not just language and motor skills but also emotional growth. Gah.
Watson and Elizabeth and Nannie need to spend more time with Emily, reading and talking about shapes, letters, and pictures. And less time needs to be spent comparing Emily to other children.
(This is an area that I work in, so I think I'm extra sensitive to how it's portrayed in these books)
BLGHAH. Claudia says that Emily doesn't seem to be as smart as everyone else in her family, which is bullshit. First of all, she's a toddler. Second of all, see everything I just wrote.
There's an adoption agency in the phone book (so presumably in Stoneybrook, or Stamford, or close) called Love Bundles, and it only specializes in placing Vietnamese children. I guess that's how it usually works, it just seems odd for the area.
Okay, later she opens the Stamford phone book, so Love Bundles is in Stoneybrook. How many adopted Vietnamese children are there in Stoneybrook?
This book is how I learned that you need to have two keys to open a safety deposit box.
Lois Lowry shoutout! Stacey finds a copy of "Find a Stranger, Say Goodbye" at the Perkins' house (o...kay?) and calls Claudia to tell her it's a story about an adopted girl.
FARGH. There is a student volunteer at the library's reference desk. There are SO MANY things wrong with that. If the Stoneybook Public Library is a unionized workplace, there are SO MANY violations. (Libraries are my field too, so I'm just set off by how improbable everything is. Wait until we get to Mary Anne and the Library Mystery if you want to see arghs.)
Apparently, all birth announcements automatically go to the local paper. I find that hard to believe. Isn't that an incredible invasion of privacy?
This part makes the least sense of anything. Claudia thinks that one of the other people born the week she was might really be her. So...if this couple was going to give up their daughter for adoption, they still had an (automatic) baby announcement?
Stacey's parents couldn't have any more kids after Stacey. I think I knew that, but it's one of those things that I forget.
There's a random Krushers practice interlude. These books could have used a good editor.
Chapter 13: Stacey finally suggests that Claudia talk to her parents. FINALLY.
Claudia's parents tell her she's not adopted. And they have an explanation for everything: they didn't take pictures because they were busy, Claudia looks like a combination of both of her parents, her birth was announced in the Stoneybrook Gazette, the special locked box has $500 in it (for emergencies). A LIKELY STORY.
In the end, Emily is accepted into preschool for the following fall (too bad she'll be two and a half forever) and Claudia accepts that she's a Kishi by birth and makes tentative peace with Janine. The end.

Final Thought: Doing a post a day has really taken it out of me, so I feel like this one isn't as snarky as it could have been. I will try to update more frequently, though, in the future, so stick around for that.

Friends Forever #11: Welcome Home, Mary Anne

2009-08-21T01:38:00.000-07:00

Tagline: Nothing stays the same...

Cover: This is the first Friends Forever title I'm covering. Thanks to a fairly reasonable recent eBay purchase, I know own all of the Friends Forever books, with the exception of Graduation Day (but thanks to ANOTHER eBay purchase, that one should be arriving soon). The Friends Forever series uses real photographs of models for the cover, I guess to make it look 'hip' and 'new'. It kind of works...? I guess...? I don't know. The whole flower motif is totally late-90s girl power. Mary Anne is the one in the middle (she has long hair in these shots, even though you can't really tell in this one, and even though she definitely has short hair on the cover of The Fire at Mary Anne's House). I would guess that Dawn is on the left (and Sunny is on the right), but the book describes Sunny as having freckles, and that's what the left side model does, but the right one doesn't look like Dawn to me...it's all so confusing.

Plot!: After The Fire at Mary Anne's House, she, Richard and Sharon have been moving from rental home to rental home while they remodel the barn so they can live in it (that's covered in Mary Anne's Breakup). In this book, the house is ready to be moved in to, so they do, and it takes some adjusting. Dawn and Jeff are home for the summer (I guess it's summer...?) and they bring Sunny with them, because Sunny's mom has just died (in the California Diaries series) and a change of scenery will be good for her. But she's not dealing with her grief, and Jeff hates the new house, and Mary Anne is starting to lose it. But then Sunny breaks down and bonds with Mary Anne, Jeff decorates her room, Sunny goes back to California, and everything is okay again.

Points of Interest:

The character bios are on the inside cover, so there's no Chapter Two. And I know that we make a lot of fun of it, but I tried reading the Sweet Valley series after the earthquake where Elizabeth is living with some weird family, but it was like #3 in the series and there was no explanation of ANYTHING and it was all kinds of confusing.
Also, the BSC has been whittled down to its original Fab Four. Mallory is at private school, Jessi is taking a lot of extra dance classes, Abby is around but not sitting, and Mary Anne and Logan have broken up. Again.
The book starts with "there's no place like home," so Mary Anne can ruminate on the meaning of home, and how she both has a home and doesn't have a home.
One of Mary Anne's diary entries is dated June 27. So I guess it is summer. Then when does Graduation Day take place? I haven't read it yet. Do they go through another year, just in that book? There better be a good answer for this! (There probably won't be).
In other other California Diaries continuity, Dawn and Jeff now have a little (half-)sister named Grace.
Jeff is aggressively angry towards the new house. I don't think he came from California to see the house after the fire, did he? I just remember Dawn coming. So why is everyone surprised and unprepared for him to be having these feelings?
Mary Anne is jealous of Sunny and Dawn's connection. I guess it's normal - she's never really had to see Dawn with her other best friend before. It still kind of feels out of place in this book, though. There's a lot going on.
The three girls go to the pool for the day, and of course Mary Anne is wearing one of her outrageous beach getups. Sunny, whose dial is stuck on 'manic', tells her to take it off. Mary Anne asks, "haven't you ever heard of skin cancer?' Sunny, whose mom died of lung cancer, replies that she's heard enough about cancer to last a lifetime. Awkward.
Speaking of, what did Mary Anne's mother die of? Is it mentioned in the books?
Sunny tries to set Mary Anne up with this jock guy, and they go out on a group triple date. The guy is actually interested in Mary Anne, but she shuts him down pretty quickly. But it's okay, because Sunny is already on to the next plan.
I love the lack of baby-sitting in these books. Mary Anne just goes on one job, at the Pikes, and it's less about them and more about Jeff's pain.
As if there wasn't enough fuel for Byron slash, he also shows remarkable talent in interior design.
Sunny feels a bit left out when the Schafer-Spiers are talking like a family, and when Mary Anne tries to talk to her about it, she flips and starts planning a rogue trip to New York. WHICH THEY GO ON, secretly, and lie to Sharon and Richard about. And they never get caught, which is surprising and kind of awesome.
Sunny throws an absolute tantrum while she's in New York, refusing to leave a store and go back to Stoneybrook before they're discovered. While Mary Anne is dealing with this, she takes the time to get freaked out by a man in a sequined pink prom dress. Hey, Oiny!
After they get home, Sunny and Mary Anne bond a bit, and Sunny decides to go back to California to grieve and be with her dad.
At the end of the book, Mary Anne decides she feels like she's home. Which is good, because this is the last book that she narrates in the series.

Final thought: I really like the Friends Forever series. I have a hard time thinking of them as canon, but that's getting easier, and I like the actual character growth and development that they go through.

#65: Stacey's Big Crush

2009-08-20T01:40:00.000-07:00

Tagline: He's smart. He's handsome. He's 22!

Cover: Stacey is giving us her best "oh, my prince" pose. Wes is smartly oblivious, but way overdressed for a school dance. Jessi is giving her best "girl, please" look, which might be Jessi's most awesome moment ever. Meanwhile, what's happening in the background? Are those streamers, or lights, or what? Where are the balloons falling from? Why does the banner have apostrophes on it? Who is on this decorating committee?

Plot!: Stacey has a crush on Wes, her new student teacher. She gets pretty obsessed with him and is confident she's in love with him (and he's in love with her), but nothing happens because she's THIRTEEN. Dawn and Mary Anne take care of Elvira, a goat, and chaos ensues.

Points of Interest:

"I knew Mr. Zizmore was giving an oral problem." So that's what the kids are calling it...in 1993.
Stacey calls herself a Divorced Kid and a Latchkey Kid. She's knee deep in a pity party and hasn't even STARTED talking about her diabetes.
Mr. Z tells Stacey that she's his star student. Even though this isn't the big crush, it does have a bit of that about it. Stacey is totally going to have an older man thing as she gets older. Do you think that's because of the divorce?
Stoneybrook Community College has a master's program? A teaching master's program? That...seems strange.
Stacey think that Wesley Ellenburg sounds like the biggest nerd ever. Didn't she learn anything from the time that Kelly dated Marvin Nerdly?
Claudia is Stacey's "one-and-only-best" friend, since she and Laine had a big fight.
Apparently, Stacey and Sam are still "technically" going out, even though they've drifted apart. So is this book after the Shadow Lake? What's the chronology here?
When Mrs. Stone stops by to ask Dawn and Mary Anne to look after her goat, Stacey is not aware that Elvira is not actually a goat, and starts freaking out about things like leaving the two month old alone and feeding her garbage and stuff. Wah-wah....
Stacey gets really excited about Dawn and Mary Anne taking care of a goat, because she's so sophisticated.
Mr. Ellenberg is compared to Tom Cruise. Okay.
Stacey's dad went to school at Wesleyan. Just in case that comes up in a trivia quiz later.
Okay, so he's completing is B.A., apparently in education, although he just has to do three weeks of student teaching, which does not seem like a lot. So why did Mr. Z it was a master's program?
What's going through Stacey's mind? "Wes. Wild Wes. How the Wes Was Won." Whoa, calm down. Later, she calls him "drop-dead incredibly hunkified gorgeous." Kristy claims there's no such word as 'hunkified.' My spell check agrees.
There's a rumour that Sabrina Bouvier (the middle school student) went out with Mr. Jordan, presumably a student. I HIGHLY doubt that. Maybe she babysat for him or something and someone saw him giving her a ride home.
Stacey spends a lot of time preparing her outfit for math class. Claudia has to tell her that it's not a date. Ugh. Stacey is all kinds of pathetic in this book.
Charlotte has a crusth on Bruce Cominsky, someone we've never heard of before and doubt we ever will again. He sounds...manly. There's also some random girl named Diane Dumschat in her class. That's an unfortunate name.
We also get a lesson that the "whoop" in "big whoop" is like "whoopee," but sarcastic. Thanks, Lerangis.
Wes asks Stacey to stay after school and help him arrange his paperwork, if you know what I mean. And that's where I start disbelieving this book. I'm sure that Wes would be hyper-aware of inapropriate student/teacher relationships and I highly doubt Stacey is being subtle about it - she wanted to wear a ball gown to class!
Oh my lord. After staying after class to help him with his papers, Stacey announces that she and Wes have a relationship. She is going to be a total bunny boiler when she's older.
Ugh. Elvira unleashes a whole bunch of 'kid' puns.
Oh my lord part two. Stacey starts imagining that she and Wes are goatherds in the Alps. This book is cracked out!
Wes has Stacey figure out the average grades of everyone in the class. He hides the names, but still. That seems unseemly.
OH MY LORD. Wes drives Stacey to a BSC meeting (in his car!) and on the way there he sings along to a love ballad. INAPPROPRIATE.
So of course, Stacey writes a poem:
I see two stars in summer's night
Blinding, hovering, lost in light
Each so dull in heaven's net
So each remains as yet unmet
But Fortune moves in strangest ways
It lengthens nights, it shortens days
May this night end and day begin
And bring two lovers back again.
Sam calls to invite Stacey to the Spring Fling dance, and even though at the beginning of the book they are technically going out, she tells him she's going with someone else.
HAHAHA Stacey gives Wes the poem. She changes 'lovers' to 'young people' but still. Wes bolts from the room.
The BSC learns the hard way that taking care of a goat is hard work. Gah. Wouldn't they have thought that before? That's how they approach EVERYTHING. "oh, pet sitting will be so much fun! Oh no, it's hard work!" "oh, looking after infants will be so much fun! Oh no, it's hard work!"
So a week after giving him THE POEM, Stacey corners Wes at the end of math class. He asks if she has a question about the assignment (no), so he asks if she has another poem for him. I laughed out loud.
OH MY LORD INFINITY. She tells Wes that she's in love with him. I am laughing and cringing and it's so awful and I love it.
Sam is going to the Spring Fling with Amanda Martin. Why is this book filled with people we've never heard of before?
Okay, after the whole declaration of love thing, Wes still does things like tell Stacey he's going to miss her....class, and confide in her about a good recommendation. This guy is crazy!
If the dance is called the Spring Fling, why doesn't the banner say SMS Spring Fling?
It's never explained why Wes is wearing a tux.
Wes to Stacey: "You're THIRTEEN!" Classic.

Final thought: I only skimmed through the Elvira stuff, so I don't know about that, but there's barely any Mallory in this book. Poor Mallory!

Super Special #12: Here Come the Bridesmaids!

2009-08-19T01:26:00.000-07:00

Tagline: It's a California wedding!

Cover: Where do I even start? Left to right, I guess. Kristy...I believe that if she had to wear a dress, she'd wear that one. Mary Anne is too tall, but the dress looks appropriately awkward on her. Dawn looks better in the dress but not at all California Casual (maybe if she took off the sleeves?) Speaking of sleeveless, Claudia looks different but not wacky. Jeff cracks me up, because he looks like a game show host making patter with a contestant "Ha, ha. Wonderful. Now, back to the game!" Plot!: This book is really two different plots in one, joined together with the tenuous thread of Christmas weddings. On the west coast, Dawn's father gets married (to Carol), and on the east coast, the Barrett-DeWitts get married, and for some reason this is a big deal for the BSC. Because this is a super special, everyone gets their own little drama:

Dawn: her father gets married and she moves back to Connecticut, for awhile.

Mary Anne: does not want to be a bridesmaid at Jack Schafer's wedding, then is hurt that she isn't, and it's all Dawn's fault. It's even stupider than this sounds.

Kristy: organizes the We Heart Kids Club's goodbye party for Dawn.

Claudia: the thirteen year old acts like a wedding planner and does weddingy things, including taking pictures

Jeff: watches Jack and Carol fight about things like an entertainment unit and a lava lamp

Stacey: is a bridesmaid for Mrs. Barrett

Mallory: gets into a fight with Ben over caroling

Shannon: watches the Barrett kids at the wedding

Jessi: is a Santa at the mall. Which has nothing to do with the weddings.

Suzi Barrett: is nervous that Santa won't find her family once they move

Points of Interest

Dawn opens the book by announcing that her dad is getting married, and she’s already making it all about
her. Apparently she has to pass her midterms (midterms?) if she wants to pass her classes (wouldn’t they be called finals?), and right after the wedding she’s flying back to Stoneybrook to live for awhile.
But the biggest WTF? Me, Me, Me moment comes when she laments that the Barrett-DeWitt wedding is the same day as the Schafer-Olson wedding, because that means that the BSC won’t be able to come to California. Wait. Time out. She was expecting all of the BSC members to come to California, to watch her Dad (who they have met once) get married? Plane tickets are not cheap!

I’d better slow down here, because there are so many WTF moments I might pull a muscle if I get outraged at them all.

Anyway, Dawn is the one who is like, “since I can’t be everywhere, and people have made the ridiculous choice not to come to my dad’s wedding, let’s keep journals!”

The other thing about this book is that there is very little explanation...of anything! It doesn’t say who is going to California or who’s helping out at the B-DeW wedding until it’s happening. I’m used to way more exposition.

Dawn buys her bridesmaid dress because she loves it: satiny material, shirred off-the-shoulder sleeves, a fitted bodice and a skirt that flared mid-calf. It’s...a pretty standard bridesmaid dress, it looks like. It does not look like something a thirteen year old girl would be excited about wearing, especially if they were as much of an individualist as Dawn is. What are you up to, Lerangis?

Dawn buys two dresses...one for her, and one for Mary Anne, who is apparently also a bridesmaid. Luckily, this turns into a plot point later on.

Stacey eats a big greasy cheeseburger at Burger Town? But what about her diabetes? Actually, I have no idea if she’s eaten burgers before, it just seems strange.

Mrs. Barrett asks Stacey to be a bridesmaid. In her wedding. At least there are other, adult bridesmaids there.

Jessi becomes a Santa for Bellair’s department store. This plot feels really out of place, because I keep forgetting it’s set at Christmas.

Mallory and Ben get into a stupid fight: they are planning to go carolling with kids, but then Mallory agrees to watch the Barretts at the wedding, which is the same day. And instead of doing the logical thing and rescheduling the carolling to like, the next day, they have a big fight. And eventually they end up going the next day anyway. Sigh.

Dawn describes her life as a soap opera. Mary Anne calls Kristy’s life a soap opera. That should have been the direction they went in for the HBO show.

I have watched too many TLC wedding shows to think that hiring a thirteen year old girl (with Claudia’s artistic sense) to decorate and/or plan your wedding is a good idea. But that’s how Claudia ‘works’ off the ticket that Jack Schafer buys for her to come to California.

Okay. Dawn forgets to tell Mary Anne that she’s a bridesmaid, and Mary Anne freaks out, because she hates being the centre of attention and she’s worried about being sunburned from the dress. Then she comes around, but it turns out that she’s NOT a bridesmaid – Dawn just assumed she would be, and didn’t talk to Jack or Carol or anyone about it. Oh my Lord. Is Dawn really that dense? Mary Anne has met Jack once. She’s the daughter of the man that his ex-wife married. Why the hell would she be in the wedding?

Mary Anne is also pretty judgemental about a beach wedding. She’d prefer a nice normal indoor wedding, which Dawn takes offence to, because Mary Anne is calling them abnormal.

Carol’s dress is not at all a wedding dress. It’s more like a dress you’d put on to have brunch with your friends because you don’t really have to impress them. Also, I always thought she was a blond, but the illustration is of a brunette.

Oh, right, the Barrett-DeWitt wedding. Shannon and Mallory are looking after the youngest B-DeW kids, and they have to sit all the way at the back of the church. I don’t get this. Why couldn’t they be up closer, sharing the day with their parents and Bobby and Lindsey, who are in the wedding?

Marnie makes a break for it and stands up at the front with her mom. Ryan DeWitt (the Stoneybrook one) starts crying and Shannon takes him out of the church. And that’s about all of the drama there.

Mrs. Barrett has three bridesmaids and a maid of honour. That seems really big for a second wedding, especially given all the stress they had planning everything.

Her dress is: a long white beaded antique gown with a plunging neckline. How plunging? Why aren’t there any pictures of that? Come on, illustrator!

After the weddings, the book kind of peters out: there’s a going away party for Dawn, Logan helps move furniture for the DeWitts, Suzi leaves a trail of bread crumbs for Santa to find her at her new house, Mallory goes carolling, Dawn gets a ticket back to California from her Dad and Carol, and she and Jeff go to Stoneybrook. The end.

p.s. sorry about any weird formatting...this one kind of got away from me.

Little Sister #116: Karen's Reindeer

2009-08-18T02:14:00.000-07:00

Tagline: Karen, the Red-nosed Reindeer, had a very shiny nose...

Cover: It looks like Karen, Hannie and Nancy are in some kind of school performance. We never had matching outfits like that in any of my school shows, but I guess that's what makes Stoneybrook Academy different.

Plot!: Karen wants to be Rudolph in her school play, but it goes to Hannie instead, and she's jealous. She's trying to be extra good for Santa, but she steals Charlie's ornament and breaks Nannie's vase and then lies about it.

Points of Interest:

Karen, in an attempt to be good, picks up someone else's gum and puts it in the garbage. Ew. I think Santa would understand if she left someone else's gum on the ground.
Heh. Emily Michelle calls Karen a meanie-mo.
Karen sees a reindeer in her yard. She immediately assumes it's Rudolph.
Nancy is telling the class that they should do a Hannukah presentation, when Karen blurts out "Rudolph!" because she's thinking about the reindeer, but the rest of the class immediately decides to do a Rudolph number. Nancy is some pissed.
The big house trims the tree and decorates the house with all of their big house decorations. I wonder if Karen ever thinks of Mom in the little house, decorating the house all by herself.
So if Karen is here in December, she'd be there in December next year, right? Assuming the month-to-month thing doesn't change. Little House: Jan, Mar, May, July, Sept, Nov; Big House: Feb, April, June, August, October, December. I guess it's about even for holidays.
Karen keeps claiming that she sees the Reindeer, but whenever Charlie looks, it's disappeared. He's being really nice about the whole thing, going along with the food in the backyard plan. He is a good big brother. More Charlie fanfic, please!
Hannie gets to be Rudolph, while Karen is Elf #4. Heh. Of course, Karen starts pulling diva fits all over the place.
Hannie gets wired up to some kind of harness so she can fly as Rudolph, but she's scared to do it. I'm so sure. First of all, what kind of school has harnesses so kids can fly? That just seems like a lawsuit waiting to happen. Also, I do not buy Hannie as being scared of heights or flying.
Karen finally confesses that she broke the vase, and it turns out not to be a big deal, because she's Karen.
In Karen's stocking is a note from Santa, thanking her for taking care of his reindeer, in what I imagine is Charlie's handwriting.
At the end of the book is a weird little change "Carefully I folded the note and slipped it into my robe pocket. I would treasure it forever. But, as it turned out, I would never see my reindeer again." So...is Karen writing this from the future? An adult Karen telling stories about her younger days? What's going on here?!

Final thought: The other day I saw some Halloween decorations in a store, and I thought, "this is ridiculous! it's not even September!" but then I looked at the store's other wall and saw Christmas decorations, and thought "oh, I love Christmas, I can't wait!" So I'm a total holiday hypocrite.

#11: Kristy and the Snobs

2009-08-17T00:10:00.000-07:00

Tagline: Nobody's going to tell Kristy what t o do - especially not the Snobs!

Cover: Shannon is shorter than Kristy is, which is not the image of Shannon I have in my head at all. Shannon's skirt is distractingly long. And why don't Shannon and Amanda have the same uniform? Don't they both go to Stoneybrook Day School? Maybe there's a primary and middle school difference? When I am wondering about the dress codes of the Stoneybrook school that we know the least about, I know it's time to step away from the computer.

Plot!: Kristy is having a hard time adjusting to being in Watson's neighbourhood, because she thinks the other people in the neighbourhood are snobs. And they're sort of proving her right, because they're mean to Louie, the Thomases sick dog, who eventually dies. But Shannon comes around and gives them Shannon, the dog, and she becomes an Associate member of the BSC!

Points of Interest:

Things Kristy cannot stand: blood, cabbage, people chewing with their mouths open, squirrels, and snobs. Where's Kristy and the Cabbage Wars or Kristy vs. the Squirrels?
Apparently Watson has been talking about putting in a swimming pool, although that never happens, does it? Too bad - I'm sure there would have been some kind of mystery in the backyard that only the BSC could solve!

Okay. What's the Brewer-Thomas car situation? In this book, Charlie drives the station wagon, and Watson and Elizabeth both have cars. Does one of these get sold/traded when Charlie gets the Junk Bucket? What about when Nannie moves in? Do they have five cars?
The Thomases' vet? You guessed it, a woman. I never noticed how many professional women there were in these books.
Kristy calls Shannon a snob, and Shannon calls Kristy a jerk. Both of them really escalated this situation pretty quickly.
While babysitting for the Papadakises (for the first time), Shannon calls Kristy and tells her that the house is on fire. That's messed up.
Kristy orders a diaper delivery service to make deliveries to Shannon's house, starting early the next morning. And they show up, presumably without a credit card number or any kind of billing information, unless Kristy billed it to the Kilbournes. There's just something not right about that whole ordering scenario.
There's a weird moment when Mary Anne is babysitting for the Perkinses, and it switches from "Mary Anne asked" to "I asked," even though Kristy isn't there.
I still think it's kind of weird that Sharon Schafer would have to call the BSC to arrange for a sitter for Jeff, and the job ends up going to Dawn, because she's free. What if someone else took it? Would that sitter and Dawn just hang out there? I guess Dawn might get another job. It kind of makes sense, but I just find it needlessly official.
Sharon goes out on a date with the Trip-Man.
Jeff is acting up and wants to go back to California and live with his Dad. Dawn is starting to say things like "I'd never do that!"
Stacey tames the snobs with a little reverse psychology, because she's so sophisticated.
Shannon orders a pizza to the Delaneys while Kristy is sitting there, but Kristy outwits the delivery guy and sends it to Shannon, who storms over and they have a big fight about baby sitting territory but end up being friends. Pizza - is there anything it can't do?
Five of the Pike kids have the chicken pox. By the time Claudia leaves, seven of them have it, all except Mallory. Poor Mallory?
Kristy misses a meeting because of Louie. I'm sure this contradicts later stuff, like "Kristy never misses a meeting" or "Mary Anne never makes a mistake" (not that she does here, but that's something that also gets tossed around that I'm pretty sure is not true)
Heh. Kristy calls Lisa "the first Mrs. Brewer," even though she's probably married to Seth Engle by now.
Okay, I'm not a big animal person, and I've never had a pet other than a goldfish, but the part about the family meeting where it's revealed that Louie is going to be put down is pretty freakin' sad.
Okay, I'm not going to lie. I'm at the part where they're at the vet, saying goodbye to Louie, and there are tears in my eyes. Damn you, Ann M. Martin!
Kristy and Karen get into a big discussion about whether to put RIP or Rest in Peace on Louie's cross. Aaaaand my tears are gone.
Astrid is a girl's name, and it means divine strength. There's your little tidbit for today.
Mary Anne makes an exercise/exorcise pun. Because there's nothing that thirteen year old girls like better than wordplay!
They make a play for Shannon to join the club, but she kind of shoots them down before they get around to asking, and so becomes an associate member, and we're one more person closer to the classic BSC lineup.

Final Thought: The chicken pox plot is very, very random. It's as if they realized they only had enough story for fourteen chapters, or they hadn't included their obligatory Pike kids reference.

#42: Jessi and the Dance School Phantom

2009-08-16T00:09:00.000-07:00

Tagline: Someone - or something - is out to get Jessi!

Cover: I think Jessi actually looks kind of cute on the cover...way better than the fug looks that they usually give her. And if not for her loooong legs, I think she'd even look kind of age appropriate. No, the hot mess on the cover is Dawn, who is in her California Casual denim-on-denim, wearing a strangely obtrusive watch, has her hair pouffed in a way that makes her head look square, and is going for...maybe scared and surprised? But comes out looking stoned. Also, why is Jessi wearing so much jewelry? Rings and a watch? At a ballet practice? I don't think so.

Plot!: Jessi gets the lead in another ballet - Princess Aurora in Sleeping Beauty. But soon after practices start, she starts getting threatening notes, and someone keeps stealing her stuff. Of course, the BSC handles this on their own (even though Jessi is INJURED by the 'phantom') and while everyone in the class is a suspect, it's eventually narrowed down to Hilary, who is jealous of Jessi and has a pushy stage mom. Meanwhile, the BSC organizes a pet show/competition thing, and I'm really not a pet person so it's even more boring that usual for me.

Points of Interest:

Ugh. This book starts off in French. Which I don't have a problem with, except that I know Jessi's fake French talking is going to come next. Maybe it's because I grew up taking French in school, but I didn't need her pronounciation guide, and even if I did, the italics indicated that it was in a different language so...whatever, Mademoiselle Romsey.
Jessi talks about being the only black student in the class, and wanting to be a ballerina when there are very few black dancers in general. It always sounds awkward and added-in when the others talk about race, but I think it's good coming from Jessi.
Carrie Steinfeld is so over the hill. It doesn't give her age, but she's about to graduate (from the school? from regular school? I don't know) and she hasn't had any lead roles. Maybe the next school she'd want to be in is like the school in Center Stage, which is kind of a university but more like a ballet school with book props.
This is all happening at an audition for Sleeping Beauty, and they all want to be Princess Aurora.
If Mr. Ramsey works in Stamford, and Jessi's dance school is in Stamford, why didn't the Ramseys just move to Stamford?
Jessi talks about how she likes wearing a uniform, because if there wasn't one there would be too much neon in the class.
The Ramseys are basically the only BSC family that shows affection for each other. Maybe it's because she's eleven, but I think Jessi's family figures into her books more than the other families (well, I guess Mallory is always doing stuff with her family, but because it's so big it's not the same).
SO. The phantom's first move: steal Jessi's toe shoes. But I don't understand how she does it. Jessi puts her bag down and changes out of her clothes. She puts the clothes in her locker and put the tights on. Then, she goes to put the shoes on, and they're not there. Did the phantom move so fast that she took them when Jessi's head was in her sweater? Did Jessi go to the bathroom or something?
Okay, here's anothing thing I don't get (and I HATE being so confused by a BSC book): Mary (the future anorexic girl?) wishes she could lend Jessi her extra shoes, but they're at home, and anyway everyone's toe shoes are different. She describes her breaking-them-in routine, and then says that she needs a new pair of toe shoes every week. Wait, what? Really? Earlier in the book, she said that Hilary gets a new pair of toe shoes whenever she needs them, while the rest of them have to make them last. So does Hilary get a new pair every day or something? Are there any dancers out there that can help me clear this up?
Suspicious behaviour: Hilary suggests everyone look for them again, while Katie Beth finds them in an allegedly empty bag.
Painstaking is a word that I learned (or semi-learned, since I'm not sure exactly what it means but I have a good idea) from the BSC books, but I've never used it or seen it used in real life.
More suspicious behaviour: Carrie keeps plowing into Jessi when they dance. That's...kind of obvious for a phantom.
The phantom's second move is to steal Jessi's entire back up outfit, and leave her a note that says BEWARE and WATCH YOUR STEP.
Jessi is way too excited over the fact that Hannie and Scott Hsu are pretend married.
Kristy babysits for neighbourhood kids and everyone gets competitive about the pet show. Boring.
Jessi slips and falls during a class, and she gets a second note: I TOLD YOU SO. FROM NOW ON, WATCH OUT. This would be a logical time to go to someone, anyone about this stuff, right? Ha hahahahaha. This is the BSC!
Third note: IT COULD HAVE BEEN WORSE. TOO BAD IT WASN'T. I don't care if it is some teenaged ballerina - this person sounds crazy and needs help.
Jessi won't go to Madame Noelle because she's convinced Madame Noele will think she's making it all up. What? What about her parents?
Mallory sits for the Barretts, and they're fighting over Pow in the pet show. Boring.
Charlie, for some reason, volunteers to drive the BSC to Stamford so the others can be Jessi's bodyguard. Whatever.
They come up with nothing, so there are more phantom activities: Jessi's leotard is returned (but cut up into shreads), she's pushed into paint, someone hides thorns in her dance bag, letters are sent, and a piece of scenery almost lands on her head. Just a normal ballet practice.
The chapters in this book jump around a lot: we're at a dance rehearsal, we're at a BSC meeting, we're at Jessi's house - all in one chapter. It's paced very strangely.
So Jessi confronts Hilary with this stupid plan to get her handwriting and it only works because Hilary does the classic bad guy move of saying to much. She says "sorry, I won't do it again" and Jessi is like, "okay, fine." SERIOUSLY. THIS GIRL NEEDS HELP. SHE TRIED TO HURT YOU. SHE DID HURT YOU. GAH.
The big solution to the pet show problem: giving everyone an award. Why didn't they just think of that sooner? That's like, the first rule of doing something with a large group of kids.
Stacey wears a tuxedo to Jessi's opening night. Because she's sophisticated.
In the dance, Jessi has to perform with a boy! He's an eighth-grader, and he has to lift her and kiss her onstage! Where were those rehearsals? That would have made for a much better story.
In the end, Hilary decides to quit dance and Jessi goes out for ice cream. Everyone is happy.

Final thought: the picture on the cover never really happens in the book. Which makes me dislike it even more. Sorry, non-fug Jessi.

Sidebar: New Content Coming...Soon!

2009-08-15T17:55:00.000-07:00

Thanks everyone for being so patient. My move is completed and while I am still kind of roughing it (in only the way that someone with electricity, water, pillows, blankets, and cable tv can rough it), I am ready to jump back on the BSC blogging train.

As a thank you, I am going to have a full week of brand-new content. Starting tomorrow, there will be new books recapped every day for a week! Well, that's the plan. As I'm writing this, there are copies of Jessi and the Dance School Phantom and Here Come the Bridesmaids! beside me. And I don't want to give anything away, but in both books there have been parts where I'm just like, "oh, come on!" So I think they will blog well.

I've also just made some purchases on eBay, so I am now several books closer to completing my collection. When I get everything assessed, I think I'll post my duplicates in case there's anything anyone is looking for. So...to sum up: coming soon - more of the same! In a good way!

Sidebar: John Hughes

2009-08-07T20:03:00.000-07:00

It might be a little longer than usual in between posts for the next little while...I'm in the middle of a move so normal services will be disrupted for awhile. Hopefully not very long.

I was really shocked by the news about John Hughes' death. 2009 seems to have had a number of high profile deaths, but I don't think anyone would have anticipated his death. Sixteen Candles was mentioned in at least The Ghost at Dawn's House, and maybe in more, too (I always liked Pretty in Pink better).

Anyway, to keep this BSC related, I'm going to match up the members to the John Hughes movie that they're most like.

Dawn - Just Visiting (screenplay by Hughes). Because, since she's bi-coastal, whether she's in California or Stoneybrook she's really just kinda visiting until she goes to the other place.

Claudia - Pretty in Pink, definitely (written by Hughes). Andie (Molly Ringwald) is a crazy dresser and everything thinks she looks awesome, and she takes a beautiful vintage prom dress and makes it look like ass.

Mallory - The Breakfast Club. She'd be the geeky one, the one who would probably volunteer to write the report at the end of the day, and the one who doesn't end up romantically paired with another person.

Jessi - Ferris Bueller's Day Off. While everyone else is boogie-ing to "Danke Shoen" and "Twist and Shout," Jessi could spice things up with some jetes or pirouettes.

Mary Anne - Sixteen Candles. I can totally picture Mary Anne kissing someone on a table with her birthday cake candles glowing away. Plus, she has a steady boyfriend, which somehow fits in with my image of this.

Stacey - Maid in Manhattan (Hughes, under a pseudonym, is credited with the story for the movie). Because, and you might not have known this, she's from New York.

Kristy - Mr. Mom (written by Hughes). Not only is Kristy and Mr. Mom an actual BSC title, but I can also see Kristy marrying a Mr. Mom type while she runs whatever successful business she runs.

Abby - Curly Sue. Along with her soccer and her Jewishness, her curly hair is what stands out for me. She narrowly beat out Stacey's inconsistent perm for this one.

#43: Stacey's Emergency

2009-08-04T16:31:00.000-07:00

Tagline: Stacey just can't win.

Cover: For once, Stacey's hair looks kind of permed, at least near the bottom. The top is kind of flat, but her bangs are happening. I hope Becca is standing on top of of a stool or something, otherwise the perspective is all out of whack.

Plot!: Stacey starts to feel sick because of her diabetes, but she doesn't tell anyone. She goes off her diet and really isn't very well, and then when she's in New York visiting her dad she ends up in the hospital. She confesses how sick she's been and talks to her parents about how they've been putting her in the middle. While she's in the hospital, Charlotte becomes convinced that she's sick, too, but she gets better when Stacey comes home.

Points of Interest:

The first chapter includes a lot of information on diabetes, just to get us prepped for the rest of the book.
Stacey is still trying to sort out a lot of the divorced kid stuff in this book, like how to talk to her parents and how to deal with the fact that she chose to live in Stoneybrook rather than in New York.
Uh-oh! Stacey steals a Ring-Ding from Claudia's room and puts it in her purse. But what about her diabetes? Won't somebody think of her diabetes?!
The scene of Stacey drinking water on the train by cupping her hands together has stayed with me since the first time I read this book. It's a strange image to remember, but there are random scenes that stick in people's minds.
I know it's partly because it was reaching a critical point, but after spending like, one night with Stacey, her father takes her to the hospital. How was she hiding this so well from her mother? And knowing how nervous her mom is about Stacey's diabetes, it's a wonder her mom doesn't go through her room and stuff.
So Stacey goes to the hospital on Saturday morning, and her mom hears about this on Saturday night? Why did they wait so long to call her? Even if there's post-divorce stuff, that's still a long time, especially because by the time Mr. McGill calls her, she doesn't have enough time to get the last train to New York.
Stacey's mom brings her a stuffed pig. I forgot about Stacey's thing for pigs.
Laine comes to visit and brings Stacey a wind-up spider with red glasses, and blue plastic tulips. Very sophisticated.
While she's worrying about Stacey, Charlotte thinks she has a pinched nerve, an ulcer, diabetes, and anemia. Later she thinks she has Lyme disease, arthritis, kidney disease, and strep throat.
On Friday Stacey wakes up and feels bad, so she rings for a nurse. Last year I was in the hospital, and not in a private room like Stacey. My bed was added into a two bed room, right between them. And my buzzer was actually the buzzer for another bed. So whenever I rang it, a nurse would pop her head in, check the first bed (mine was on the other side of a curtain), and then leave. It took me awhile to figure out what was happening.
Stacey and her mom have a weird talk about her Dad, and his workaholic ways and how he avoids problems. But then Stacey doesn't want to talk anymore, so they find a Woody Allen movie and watch that. Because Woody Allen movies ALWAYS make situations less awkward.
Other sophisticated New York gifts from Laine: A camouflage print hat that says "Daddy's Little Hunting Buddy," a pair of light-up sunglasses, glow in the dark jewelry, a palm tree pen, and a mirror that laughs at you.
Alan Gray set off a cherry bomb in the bathroom? That seems...really serious.
Cokie got a nose job? That also seems unlikely.
After she comes home (after two weeks in the hospital), Stacey finally tells her mother that she's tired of being put in the middle. And her mom seems to listen. Hurrah!

Final Thought: I really like the colour of blue of Stacey's shirt on the cover. When I first read this, I would have thought that was the coolest shirt ever.

Sidebar: BSC FanFic

2009-07-29T06:51:00.000-07:00

If you're between books at the moment or looking for something to read that says the things you've always thought, I highly recommend Viva Las BSC! It was written a few years ago by a group of fans from the Fametracker boards, and in my opinion it captures the spirit of BSC snarkery perfectly.

I waded through a fair amount of BSC fanfic in the time between I discovered the online BSC following and decided to start a blog. A lot of it gets to be the same, though, and few of them are actually finished stories. In my unscientific view, I think that the most popular things to write about are the BSC reunion story and the Karen/Vanessa/Charlotte/someone else in that age group start their own BSC.

Here are some things that I'd like to see explored in the fanfic (and if anyone knows of or has written something along these lines, feel free to recommend it!)

The Kristy/Charlie/Sam relationship, especially with their father
Janine/Charlie (friendship...and maybe more?)
Watson/Lisa/Elizabeth (not necessarily a love triangle, but how the one marriage ended and how Watson and Elizabeth met)
Richard/Elizabeth (they never seemed like they even knew each other! Not romance, just as neighbours)
Richard/Sharon in high school
Laine in New York, living it up like Jen Lindley and Blair Waldorf

Little Sister Super Special #5: Karen's Baby

2009-07-27T15:42:00.000-07:00

Tagline: Karen's a fairy godsister!

Cover: That is a creepy looking baby. And that is a terrible pattern on the walls.

Plot!: Karen is excited about Nancy's soon-to-be-born little brother or sister. She's pestering the Dawses every chance to get. Finally little Daniel is born, but he's pretty little and kind of sick, and that freaks Nancy out. Eventually he can come home and Nancy calms down and everyone's happy. She makes Karen's Danny's fairy godsister, which doesn't happen until the end of the book even though it was included on the cover.

Points of Interest:

When the book starts, Karen is pestering her mom for a little brother or sister. Her mom says it is out of the question. Maybe Seth is sterile? Also, she tells Karen that she already has a little brother, but doesn't say anything about a little sister (Emily Michelle). Is that weird, or would it be weirder for Lisa to mention her?
Karen has taken to calling the Dawses' house all the time to see if Nancy's mom has gone into labour yet. And...the adults allow this? Karen seems weirdly overinvested in someone else's baby.
BSC shoutout! They have a sleepover at Kristy's/Karen's, and the BSC gives Nancy advice on taking care of a baby.
Someone in Stoneybrook goes into labour, and they DON'T call the BSC! Nancy goes to stay at Karen's Little House instead.
Nancy names her little brother Daniel. I wonder if her parents were planning to use their veto power if they didn't like the name she chose.
When Nancy sees her brother, she gets scared and starts crying because he's so little.
We all get a Cultural Awareness lesson in what a Mezuzah is. Because Nancy's Jewish, remember.
The Three Musketeers decide to sell the baby supplies that they made. Because people are dying to own mobiles and bottle warmers made by seven year olds.
Nancy's mom spends about five days in the hospital.
Daniel comes to school as a special show and share guest. He's a few weeks old. But in the accompanying illustration, he looks about six months old. I don't know a lot about babies, and I know they change pretty quickly, but still...something looks off.
Nancy makes Karen Danny's fairy godsister in an elaborate ceremony that involves a crown with Karen's name on it. Karen loves it.
In the back pages, there's a list of the most popular boys's and girls' names from 1950, 1980, and 1988. The 1988 girls names are: Jessica, Jennifer, Stephanie, Melissa, Nicole, Ashley, Tiffany, Amanda, Christina, and Samantha. That sounds about right.

Final Thought: I'd never really realized that a Little Sister Super Special is the same size (20 chapters) as a regular LS book, only with crafts and stuff at the end. Huh.

#107: Mind Your Own Business, Kristy!

2009-07-24T19:30:00.000-07:00

Tagline: Oh, brother!

Cover: Go for it, Charlie! Although he looks kind of fug through the face. Angelica is exhibiting quite the bitchface. And Kristy looks kind of like Blair from Gossip Girl, if Blair was undercover as...no, Blair would never look like that.

Plot!: It's Spring Break! So naturally, Kristy decides to organize a softball clinic for the Krushers. She gets Charlie to help her, but he starts exhibiting normal teenage behaviour when he'd rather be around Angelica. Kristy gets jealous and upset and they fight, and it's not pretty. Then, on their way to a concert, Angelica gets everyone in an accident and it's a big mess. Eventually Kristy and Charlie work out their differences and bond in a siblingy way.

Points of Interest:

One of the colleges that Charlie receives a brochure from is from Levithan Polytechnic Institute, which I think is a Peter Lerangis shout-out to YA writer David Levithan.
Kristy wins tickets to a Blade concert. Blade is her all-time favourite rock group, in case you didn't know.
Kristy + Bart = not that much, apparently. They're on the outs for this book.
A Sassy reference? I think that's another case of Lerangis seeing how much he can slip by AMM.
Kristy decides to hold a softball clinic for the Krushers. But uh-oh! Dissension in the ranks! Stacey whines that they're on vacation. And so, accordingly, Stacey isn't much heard from for the rest of the book.
Charlie is distracted by Angelica, who is baby-sitting from the Hsus (an outside baby-sitter?!?). We know we're not supposed to like her because Kristy doesn't, and we know she's bad news because she smokes!
Watson takes Kristy shopping at a sports store, but then goes into a gourmet shop and Kristy explains that he isn't an athlete. But didn't he help her set up the Krushers? And doesn't he umpire for them? Maybe he's just being nice.
Kristy tries to set Charlie up with Sarah, his ex-girlfriend, by arranging for them both to be in the same place at the same time. And just like every other time this has been used on TV or in a book, it doesn't work.
Charlie starts blowing off the Krushers' Klinic (no, really, that's what it's called) to spend time with Angelica. So Kristy tells Charlie that he's acting like their dad. Low blow, Kristy.
Charlie borrows Watson's car to take him, Angelica, Kristy, and Claudia to the Blade concert, but he's so used to driving the crummy old Junk Bucket that he has no idea how to drive a fancy car. So Angelica drives, but gets pulled over by a cop car. But it turns out she didn't have a license! So she and Charlie try to switch places (while driving!), and the car rams into the shoulder barriers. Watson is going to be pissed.
But when they get home, Charlie's punishment is to pay for the traffic ticket, not drive the Junk Bucket (not even to Kristy's BSC meetings?) and to rethink his social attachments. Harsh.
Oh, and Charlie also promised to get Jack Brewster, a famous ex-ball player, to come to the Krushers' Klinic. But he flaked on that, too. But Sarah, his ex-girlfriend, is related to Jack Brewster and she arranges for him to come after all!
Angelica sends a note to Charlie: "Dear Charles. I haven't called you because I'm really upset. I didn't want to cry and yell over the phone, so I figured I'd write instead. First of all, I'm sorry for what I did. It was stupid. My parents are so mad at me. They don't want me to see you ever again. They said it was totally unlike me to do what I did. They think you were a bad influence. I argued with them a lot. But then I thought about it. My last boyfriend had a car, too, and I never tried to drive it. Well, he was a great driver, that was the main reason. But even if I asked, no way would he have let me. He was this super-mature type. We actually had a lot in common. I think we broke up because we were almost exactly alike. Then I met you. You were so different - like a big kid. I needed that for awhile. But I have this weakness - I let other people's personalities rub off on me. So what I'm saying is, I think my parents were right. I need to move on, Charlie. I need to find someone on my wavelength. Hope you're not mad at me. Ciao, Angelica."
Okay. Unless Charlie and Angelica knew each other from school (and she probably goes to Stoneybrook Day School or something), they've known each other less than a week. They were on like, one date.
The rest of the book is kind of hit and miss (no baseball pun intended, if there even is one there), but pages 124-127 are really, really good. Charlie is forced to confront Angelica's statement that he's a big kid and Kristy's allegation that he's just like their dad. He and Kristy talk about what is was like when their Dad left and how Charlie pulled the whole family together. I know I mentioned this in Kristy's Big Day (probably in reference to this book), but I really do like the Kristy-Charlie-Sam dynamic, especially when they're talking about serious stuff.
Jack Brewster shows up and everyone is happy. And he tries to get Charlie and Sarah back together. He's a ballplayer AND a matchmaker! I smell sitcom!

Final Thought: This, like almost all of my books, is one that I bought used (this one is from eBay) and the previous owner filled in the notebook pages at the back. She's seven and in 2nd Grade and bought the book from Chapters. Her favourite part was when Sarah helped Charlie, her favourite member is Mary Anne, she is most like Claudia because they have jet black hair, and if she could write a BSC book it would be about "kissing and in love things." This is what she thinks of Angelica: she's a show-off, a liear, and is acetative.

#52: Mary Anne + 2 Many Babies

2009-07-22T16:46:00.000-07:00

Tagline: How much trouble can a bunch of babies be?

Cover: Mary Anne is at her most soccer mom here, with tight legging-like pants, an oversized sweater and push-down slouch socks. Ricky, the baby in the white and red outfit, has really pointed ears; he looks a little like Batboy.

Plot!: Once again, the BSC is baby crazy. They get a call from parents of baby twins, wanting them to sit for their twins. So Mary Anne does, and the jobs start out easy, but then they get hard, because looking after babies is hard. At the same time, the girls have an assignment for Modern Living where they have to take care of an egg and pretend it's their baby. Mary Anne and Logan are paired up, and they can't agree on anything, and they have big fights. And in the end they decide that they're too young to raise a baby, even an egg baby. Also, Dawn and Mary Anne are pestering their parents for a little brother or sister, but they change their minds after the sitting and the class. Luckily, Richard and Sharon didn't take their family planning cues from their 13 year old children, and instead offer to get them another pet, which they decline.

Points of Interest:

Mary Anne finds hedge clippers in the bread drawer. Oh, Sharon.
Shillaber twins shoutout! Mariah and Miranda have a new baby brother. This starts Dawn and Mary Anne talking about how awesome it would be if their parents had a baby. I just don't get it. The household had enough of a hard time adjusting to TIGGER when he moved in, how are they going to handle a baby?
Dawn and Mary Anne leave an hour early to go to Claudia's. That seems...excessive. How far away is Claudia's house?
Ugh. Mary Anne describes Claudia's skin as creamy. Ew. That is currently my number one pet peeve about the series. I'm dealing with it by imagining fake conversations that the ghost writers had with each other:

Ghostwriter #1: Hey, ghostwriter #2.
Ghostwriter #2: Hey, ghostwriter #1. What's up.
G1: I'm just wrapping up work on #55.
G2: Nice. I'm almost done Mystery #7. Hey, what kind of Claudia outfit did you include?
G1: A fringe vest, culottes, yellow boots, red socks, a cowboy hat, and a side ponytail. You?
G2: A tie-dyed unitard, a skirt made of ties, feathered earrings, lace-up sandals, and a sombrero.
G1: Awesome. Is it summer for your book?
G2: Yeah, again.
G1: Me, too.
G2: Oh, I wanted to tell you, I managed to work all of our suggested phrases into Chapter Two.
G1: No way. I've only ever managed about 75%.
G2: I know, it wasn't pretty but it's all there. Creamy, bi-coastal, an exaggerated 'long,' mansion and millionaire, steady boyfriend, orthodontist appointments, diabetes, ew, Nancy Drew, California Casual, genius, math, perm, broken leg, French, contacts, War and Peace, sophisticated, dibble, fresh, day-glo, exotic, an individual, Stamford, barre, six mentions of divorce, junior members, triplets, Kentucky, and ice cream.
G1: I can never bring myself to write California Casual.
G2: Yeah, I know. Although it's describing her as an individual that I have the hardest time with.
G1: Hey, did you cram the BSC information together with the chapter two stuff, or did you leave them separate?
G2: No, I left them separate. That way there's less room for the real plot, because it just doesn't make any sense. I mean, it directly contradicts the last book I wrote.
G1: Tell me about it. (beep beep) Oh, I have another call. (new call) Hello?
AMM: Ghostwriter 1? It's Ann M. Martin.
G1: Oh, hi, Ann. How are you?
AMM: You know, I think you should call me Ms. M. Martin. We don't know each other that well.
G1: Okay, Ms. M. Martin. How are you?
AMM: Fine, thank you. I was just having tea like a Lovely Lady and I had a Great Idea.
G1: What was it?
AMM: In Chapter Five, I want you to make an I Love Lucy reference. To the time when she and Ethel worked in the chocolate factory.
G1: (sigh) Okay, Ms. M. Martin. I'll make sure it's in there.
AMM: Great. Do you want to talk to my cats?
G1: That's okay. I'll catch them next time. Bye.
AMM: Bye. (hangs up)
G1: You still there?
G2: Let me guess - I Love Lucy.
G1: I need a drink.

In Modern Living, the teacher asks who is capable of parenting of being married, or living on your own. And Mary Anne thinks that she is, because she babysits a lot. Gah. Really, Mary Anne? I had so much hope for you.
Oh, it gets worse. She also thinks that she and Logan are ready to 'take the big step.' As long as 'the big step' means getting fake married in your 8th grade class.
Shawna Riverson is drawn as being really ditzy. But in Claudia and the Middle School Mystery, she's supposed to be an A student and really capable of organizing stuff.
Four boys in the class have to marry each other. But they have to pretend that one is a girl, because there HAS to be a husband and a wife. Otherwise it's not a marriage! Boy, attitudes were really different back in 1992!
Their first assignment is to figure out if they can afford to live on their own and pay all of their bills. What 13 year old can do that? Unless they're receiving money from some kind of trust or something, I guess, or if they're emancipated minors of some kind, but I hope it's an exercise designed to show them that they can't take care of themselves yet.
Whoa! Microwave popcorn! That seems really advanced for AMM.
The Modern Living class is given eggs, and have to pretend that they're children. I remember being really nervous that one of my classes was going to try that, but they never did.
This is bringing back memories of Degrassi Junior High, the episode Eggbert, where Spike is pregnant and Shane wants to kind of be involved, so she gives him the egg to look after. Spoiler alert: It doesn't end well.
I know I'm giving you a lot of non-book content in this one, but it's kind of a boring book.
Mary Anne and Logan walk around for the whole book calling each other Dear and Sweetheart. I think they're getting into this a little too much.
Kristy "marries" Alan Gray and they name their egg Izzy. She takes him on a job to the Papadakis' house, and Alan calls to check on them. And then Kristy tells him that the egg is shy and nervous and then they talk about the egg's socialization and development. No, really. They talk for so long that Hannie and Linny and Sari wander off and do their own thing. And that's what I call Bull on. Yes, Kristy would be into a school assignment, but no way would she neglect her baby-sitting duties while on the job. Think of the club's reputation!
Mary Anne and Logan name their child Samantha.
Stacey "marries" Austin Bentley and their egg is named Bobby. She shows how sophisticated she is by not really being into the project that much. Then she sits for the Gianellis and Alicia is terrified by the egg, because she saw it in a bed. So she calls her 'husband' to come over and take the baby, and realizes how difficult it is to be a single parent.
Dawn marries some guy named Aaron Albright and her egg is named Skip, and she hates that name. She would have named the egg Douglas. But she does PSA that she is never ever changing her name, no matter who she marries.
One of the couples in the class lost their baby: she was in the tin they keep her in when they left school, but when they checked at the park she was gone. They say that they don't know she got out of the tin. Except...she didn't. She's an egg. Either there's a hole in the tin, or something or someone took her out. I can't snark too much on a lost child, but these people seem to be forgetting that it's still just an egg.
Mary Anne thinks that she'll wait until she's a lot older before she gets married. Like, when she's 22.
At the end of the class, they hand in a 32-page, typed, single spaced paper. That seems...like a lot. They also have to write a good-bye letter to their egg, twenty-one years in the future. That would be in...2013. So their Egg would be now 17 years old...if it wasn't an egg.
Mal wants eight kids, just like her mom. I have a hard time believing that.

Final Thought: I had no idea so much Degrassi Junior High was on Youtube. This is really making me happy.

Super Special #8: Baby-Sitters at Shadow Lake

2009-07-21T06:51:00.000-07:00

Tagline: Campfires, ghost stories - summer vacations are the best!

Cover: I feel like we've seen that outfit on Claudia before. I guess wearing cowboy boots to a camp-out is what classifies her as wacky. Dawn looks kind of simple, and has really dark eyebrows. Jessi looks like a man. Mallory looks middle-aged.

Plot!: Watson is asked by his aunt if he wants to inherit an old cabin at Shadow Lake. He isn't sure, so he decides to spend some time their with his family. And the BSC, of course. Kristy really wants him to keep the cabin and organizes the BSC into keeping a diary to give to Watson as an after-trip gift.
Individual plots are:

Dawn finds out a mystery and thinks that Shadow Island (where they go on a camp-out) is haunted
Stacey has to deal with Sam, who is suddenly in love with her
Jessi meets a boy, teaches him to dance, and is conflicted because of Quint
Mary Anne baby-sits for Karen, Hannie and Nancy, and they find a playhouse in the woods
Kristy learns how to drive a boat
Mallory is attacked by bugs and baby-sits for David Michael, Linny and Nicky, who fight a lot
Claudia decorates a boat for the boat parade

No, seriously. Those are the plots. There's even less going on here than in a regular Super Special. Anyway, in the end Watson decides to keep the cabin (or agree to have it willed to him, I guess) and calls Kristy his daughter, which she likes.

Points of Interest:

Shadow Lake is in the mountains of Western Massachusetts. In case you want to go there for yourself.
The Brewer/Thomases are allowed to bring friends, so David Michael invites Linny Papadakis and Nicky Pike, Karen invites Hannie and Nancy, and Kristy brings Emily Bernstein. No, just kidding, she invites the whole BSC. And Watson and Elizabeth go for it, because they don't really want to spend time with their family when they can get 13- and 11-year olds to do it for them.
FYI: Jessi is black and Mallory is white. For your information.
Jessi sees a cute guy (who is dark-skinned like her (again, that's what the book says)) and starts getting excited, then feels badly because she forgot about Quint. As if, in all of NYC, Quint never sees a girl and thinks "Hmm, she's cute." Or a guy.
Sam calls Stacey Dahling and ravishing.
The sitters make fun of Stacey for saying Yo, as in "Yo! Look out at the middle of the lake." I would maybe think that this was strange, but I'm watching MuchMoreMusic's 100 Greatest Hip Hop songs and all of the slangiest words from the 1980s, 90s, and 2000s are running together in my head.
The BSC finds a boat under the dock, but Watson and Elizabeth decide that only people over 12 can take lessons to drive it. Take that, Mallory and Jessi.
Karen gets two chapters in this book. So does David Michael. That's as many as Mallory. Sam gets one, too.
Kristy's mom wears a bikini when she's just hanging out around the cabin. Not bad for a mother of four.
The BSC goes to the lodge to eat by themselves. Kristy says she has a great idea. Then the waiter comes and they say they need five minutes. Then they choose, and the waiter comes back 15 minutes later. THEN Jessi says "what was your great idea, Kristy?" So what were they talking about for the 15 minutes? The menu?
Anyway, Kristy's Great IdeaTM is to go out to Shadow Island and spend the night. Everyone thinks it's a great idea except for Dawn, who is pretty much scared out of her mind. What? Dawn loves ghost stories and mysteries. I find this highly out of character for her, especially when Mary Anne is okay with going out to the island. I guess it's in line with her New York, New York persona when she wouldn't even go outside, but it still doesn't seem like Dawn.
So Daniel, the boy Jessi's obsessing over, says hello, and Jessi starts freaking out because she has previously in her life also said hello to another guy. Seriously. Jessi, chill.
Daniel asks if she wants to go to the dance at the lodge with him, and Jessi says yes, even though in the previous paragraph she realized they had nothing in common - he likes sports and hates reading and baby-sitting, and he can't dance.
Mallory is being eaten alive by bugs, and Kristy called her hopeless and an embarassment. Claudia and Stacey tease her about her bug netting, and Mallory flips out, telling them to shut up. I kind of hoped that this would be Mallory's chance to really go crazy and call out the BSC on all of their shit, but no, by the end of her chapter she's back to fretting about mosquito bites.
Claudia is looking after Andrew and Emily Michelle, and she takes them to the docks and then announces she is going to stop and draw. Andrew says they will too, and Claudia is relieved because she didn't know what they were going to do. That...seems like pretty bad baby-sitting to me.
Sam is obsessed with shaving and talks on and on about 'whiskers.' Because he's a grizzled old prospector.
Dawn gets a lead on the Shadow Lake mystery, and it's about the Bayard family, who disappeared years ago under mysterious circumstances. By an astonishing coincidence, the clerk at the general store was Annie Bayard's fiance, and Dawn pushes ahead and pumps him for details, no matter how painful.
There's a picture with Claudia, Kristy and Dawn in the boat parade, waving to the crowd - but Claudia and Kristy were the only ones in the parade. Dawn just joined them for the ride home. Bad continuity!
Oh, and the boat, dressed up like the Lake Monster, wins for Most Spirit.
In the picture where he's driving them to Shadow Island, Sam is wearing a button-down dress shirt. While driving a boat. While camping. Wouldn't he be more comfortable in a T-shirt or something?
To pass the time on the island, the BSC sings the theme song to the Beverly Hillbillies. Naturally.
When Dawn's brother Jeff was younger, he called it a "waterlemon." Precious.
Mallory shares her theories on alien abduction for the purposes of scientific discovery. What?
Dawn finds a locket in the remains of the Bayard house and gives it to her fiance when they get back to the mainland. "This is for you," she says. "It's from Annie." Which is pretty much exactly what Jessica and Elizabeth say in Sweet Valley Twins' The Curse of the Ruby Necklace.
David Michael and his friends were trying to make a fort to compete to Karen's playhouse, but their efforts don't lead to much. But everything works out in the end and Karen agrees to share their playhouse, because they're bored with it.
It takes Stacey and Claudia FOUR HOURS to get ready for a casual family dance at the lodge. That seems extreme.
Stacey and Claudia work out a secret signal for Claudia to rescue Stacey from Sam: blinking their eyes. It's perfect! Because no one ever blinks their eyes otherwise.
So Stacey and Sam dance at the dance, and I really hope this picture turns out, because you have to see this illustration. Stacey looks like she's too weak to stand on her own legs so she's grabbing at Sam for support, and Sam looks like he's medically checking to see if Stacey is wearing a bra. It's the most awkward picture this side of Logan and Mary Anne's Sea City date.
At the dance, Jessi awkwardly and embarrassingly confesses to Daniel that she already has a guy she likes. But it turns out that he already has a girlfriend back in Boston! Wait. Time out. Now, it's true that most of Jessi's "OMG he likes me!" is made up (like, he walks her home after their dance lesson), but I have to say he was leading her on a little bit. He stalks her to the dance studio and asks her for dance lessons, invites her to the dance with him. calls her gorgeous, and puts his arm around her. Those are kind of dick moves for a guy with a girlfriend.
To get Stacey's attention, Kristy says "Yo, Stacey!" I guess Stacey's sophisticated New York language has rubbed off on her.
Stacey whispers that Shadow Lake is soooo romantic. I can totally see her as the type who would honeymoon here with Sam because it was where they first fell in LUV. That should be a BSC fanfic, if it isn't already: The BSC is reuniting for Stacey's wedding to Sam, and it's all happening at Shadow Lake! Will Dawn try to solve the mystery? Will Jessi get time off from her fabulous ballet career? Will Kristy bring Abby as her date? Will they remember to invite Mallory?
In the end, Watson decides to allow his aunt to will her cabin to him, and in a letter to her he refers to Kristy as his daughter. And she's really touched by that, which is kind of sweet.

Final thought:

I love the Super Special illustrations, in the way that it's like, "OMG I can't believe they put that in a book and people bought it."

Mystery #2: Beware, Dawn!

2009-07-19T11:17:00.000-07:00

Tagline: Someone is out to scare Dawn!

Cover: Yep, it's a mystery. Dawn, California Casual in denim-on-denim and some weird bracelet, needs the curtain to protect her from the eeeeevil envelope. It kind of looks like the house is on fire, too, but that doesn't really happen.

Plot!: This is one of the most poorly plotted Mysteries, I would say. Because not only does it pretty much rip off two previous books (Little Miss Stoneybrook...and Dawn, and Claudia and the Phantom Phone Calls), it has all of the girls working separately and only really coming together at the end of the book. But I'm getting ahead of myself.

One by one, the sitters (except Kristy) start receiving mystery notes and calls on their sitting jobs. They each decide not to tell each other, because at the same time there is a Sitter of the Month contest, and they each want to win (even though they agree not to compete against each other). Eventually they do share the ideas and come up with a plan to trap Mr. X. Which they do, and it's a little boy who hates the BSC because they got him in trouble for teasing. But he gets the help he needs and everyone is happy. Oh, and there's a seven-way tie for the best sitter, and they all win. The end.

Continuity Watch: Claudia and the Phantom Phone Calls, Little Miss Stoneybrook...and Dawn, Stacey's Emergency and Jessi's Baby-sitter all get shoutouts. That does not make up for basically recycling the plots.

Points of Interest:

In the first chapter, there are a bunch of regulars (Nicky Pike, Jamie Newton, the Hobarts) and then two other boys, Zach Wolfson and Mel Tucker, who apparently also made an appearance in Kristy and the Secret of Susan. Do you think that this random mention has anything to do with the mystery? Knowing the BSC, there are probably a tonne of red herrings, but in this case it's more like the random 8 year old in the first act will go off in the third act.
Dawn shares that her "wardrobe is mostly in bright colors, and it's all pretty informal stuff - loose and kind of sporty." Really?
So Ben Hobart and Mallory were studying at the library. When Dawn breathlessly reports this to Mary Anne, MA sighs and gets teary eyed. There's sensitive, and then there's emotional problems.
Although if you're going to cry at a telephone commercial, it better be the one about the grandson calling his grandfather from Dieppe and saying thank you.
Dawn says she likes to hear Mallory rattle off the names of her brothers and sisters. Really? I mean, there are seven names to say, but it's not that impressive. It's not like it's Matt Damon's imaginary siblings in Good Will Hunting.
Ben thinks that Mal is a "bonzer sheila," which apparently means a great girl, although this has never been confirmed by an actual Australian person.
The kids at school decided that there should be a contest for "Sitter of the Month," to show who is the most fun and nicest and the best baby-sitter. I love the idea that the kids came up with this specifically because they KNEW that it would mess with their minds.
While sitting for Karen, Andrew and David Michael, Dawn plays Let's All Come In, featuring Bruce Stringbean, Darryl Blueberry, and Ladonna. Then Kristy accuses her of being "super-sitter" to win the contest. I have a feeling there's no pleasing Kristy.
Stacey says that when they compete with each other it never goes well. Jessi agrees, bringing up the time she stole Jackie Rodowsky's science project out from under him. Which...was not about that at all. It was more reactionary because of how Aunt Cecelia was treating her. A better example is the Miss Stoneybrook pageant, which they do eventually bring up.
While sitting for the Prezziosos, Dawn has Jenny - a four year old - answer the phone. That does not seem like a super-sitter decision. Especially because the caller is Mr. Nobody/Mr. X, the mysterious figure who is menacing the sitters.
Dawn's letter to her brother: "Dearest Little Bro, What's up? What's fresh? Everything's cool back here in Stoneybrook. What's happening out there in sunny Cal?" No, really.
Mr. X leaves a note on the Prezziosos' front porch: You'd better watch out, you'd better not shout! I'm going to get you. Mr. X. And it's done in cut-out letters, like a ransom note. Dawn immediately thinks that Jenny is behind it. Jenny, the four year old, who is currently asleep in bed, was behind this complicated note. Dawn is full of wild assumptions in these mysteries.
Also, Dawn decides to not tell anyone about this. Gah. This note is really scary! Also, why does Dawn assume it's for her? Maybe someone wants to kidnap Jenny or Andrea or something, and Dawn is hiding evidence.
When a similar thing happens at the Rodowsky's house, the boys want to call the police. Why are the children smarter than the baby-sitter?
Is anyone surprised that Becca's favourite show is The Cosby Show?
Ah, popcorn makers. Do people use those anymore?
When Jessi is sitting, she gets a note from Mr. X (Best wishes from your secret admirer) and a bouquet of flowers with dead flowers on it. But Jessi doesn't say anything either, because she wants to impress the others.
The Pike parents. I never know what to think about them. I've talked before about the ridiculousness of having four kids under the age of 2 and then continuing to have more children each successive year, but they also talk about how easy going they are when it comes to rules. But then Mallory (whose perspective is definitely skewed) says how tough they are about her clothes and appearance. I wonder what they would do if Mallory wore, like, a sparkly top or something. They'd probably ground her, but then insist that she babysit for them anyway.
The note for Mallory and Mary Anne: Do you like your hamster? If you do, you'd better keep an eye on him. And there's a picture of an eye instead of the word. Okay, that's pretty much a direct threat. And they still decide not to do anything.
But the Pikes see it and freak out and decide to spend the rest of the day protecting Frodo, their hamster. So now this crazy person is affecting the kids, and yet the sitters still decide to not do anything. This is aggrevating.
Oh, and a dead mouse shows up on the Pike's porch. Here's my thinking: if you're ever in a situation where you're trying to decide if it's serious or not, and dead animals show up, it's serious.
Kristy sits for the Kormans, and she gets a mysterious phone call....from her mom. And then the door rings....and it's Mr. Papadakis. Waah-waah.
Chapter 11, page 98: the sitters FINALLY come clean about Mr. X. And it turns out that they all have Mr. X stories - except Kristy. So, of course, Dawn starts to suspect Kristy as the culprit. Because Kristy would TOTALLY sabotage the club in order to win the super-sitter contest.
Claudia's notebook entry: Whooever Mr. X is, I wish he wuld just dissapear off the fase of the eurth. I mean, even if he is'nt danjerus, or evil, or any of that stuff, the fact is that hes' a pest. A reel pane. And I wish he'd quit buging us. I get that she can't spell, but not even the word FACE? or REAL? GAH.
Mr. X smears baked beans all over the Johanssen's porch. O...kay.
While baby-sitting for Jamie Newton, Jamie lets it slip to Dawn that Mel Tucker is going to do a secret baby-sitting check on them. Mel...Who? Oh, right, that random guy from the first chapter. I'm sure glad I paid attention to that!
When the doorbell rings Dawn says: "I had a feeling it wasn't Avon calling, if you know what I mean." This line cracks me up.
With a suspect in mind, the BSC set up a sting to catch Mr. X in the act. I don't know why they didn't do this already. Mr. X has a pretty similar M.O.: a few phone calls, and then something left at the door. So why wouldn't they just have someone staking out a sitting job? No, instead they have this fake thing, where Dawn tells everyone that she'll be home alone, sitting for her 'cousin.'
Mr. X breaks into Dawn's house through her secret passageway. That's...really creepy.
So Mr. X turns out to be Mel Tucker after all. He confesses to everything, except for the dead mouse and making some noises that Dawn heard. The reason he was doing all this? Because the BSC told Mrs. Hobart that he was teasing her boys, and she told Mel's parents, who grounded him.
After hearing Mel's story, including that his parents want to send him to a psychiatrist (or, as Kristy says, a feelings doctor), Dawn tells Mel's dad that Mel is basically a sweet kid. Um, how do you know that, Dawn? You've already said you don't know him very well, and what you have seen: teasing an Autistic girl, teasing the Hobarts, threatening the BSC, and breaking his grounding to scare the BSC and their charges, not to mention conning the rest of the kids into giving him the information of where the BSC would be sitting. So, stay out of it.
Sleepover, pizza: guess what! Yes, that's right, a pizza toast. Dawn eats cheesy pizza? I guess it's vegetarian, but I would see her going for a sprout topping or something.
A whole bunch of kids show up at Claudia's to announce the winner of the Sitter of the Month contest. And it's a seven-way tie. Yes, they all win. Gag.

Final Thought: Even though this one comes fairly deep into the series (1991), there's still a lot of Kristy and Dawn tension simmering just below the surface.

#99: Stacey's Broken Heart

2009-07-16T20:43:00.000-07:00

Tagline: Will Stacey and Robert be together forever?

Cover: Why do these covers always ask such stupid questions? Anyway, the cover. Is it just me, or does Robert look like he's saying something like "Stacey, I know we're young, but I promise I'll take care of you and the baby." My interest is definitely more in the guys in the background, silently arranging some kind of train-based rendezvous.

Plot!: It's summer time in Stoneybrook, and Stacey is heading to New York for a week-long baby-sitting job with the Walkers, the arty couple from the building she used to live in. The problem is that she's nervous about being away from Robert, her boyfriend. But while she's there she meets Ethan, who's older and a city guy, and Robert starts seeing other people, and they break up. Meanwhile, Kristy is on vacation with her family, and Abby's in charge of the BSC. She decides to have a Mexican festival, and it's kind of a disaster, because Abby sucks as president and they all miss Kristy's tyrant ways.

Points of Interest:

Stacey says that the popular kids' values "are the pits." Take that, popular girls.
But that doesn't keep Robert from smiling at Andi Gentile! But Robert! Think about their values.
Another girl, Sheila MacGregor, wore a tight purple unitard to play tennis in. Huh?
The Walkers are a big deal on the New York arts scene, apparently: she's an illustrator, and he does oil paintings, and they're having a show at a major gallery. But when they need someone to watch their kids, they call a 13-year old girl who lives in Connecticut. What about every other time they need a sitter?
Stacey and Robert spend time together playing a video game, Marvel in the Mist. Cool?
Stacey talks about how much she loves a tan, even though she knows it's, like, bad for you. I can totally see Stacey's Skin Cancer being a later BSC book.
Stacey says that Mary Anne's haircut is adorable. That's definitely not what they said when she got it cut! Mary Anne's Makeover is probably my most favourite BSC book.
Heh. Stacey says Mal has "inner beauty." Poor Mallory!
Okay, the time line is a little weird on this one. I think that this is right around the same time as Dawn Schafer, Undercover Babysitter, but in this one she's not in Stoneybrook anymore. And Stacey leaves town, but in the other book she's here. It's been awhile since I read Dawn and Too Many Sitters, so I'm a bit confused on the timeline.
Stacey wonders if she's heartless because she's not upset about leaving her boyfriend for a week. No, really.
In this book, when Abby's in charge, she says it's okay to be a few minutes late - not 15, but up to a few minutes. This jumped out at me because it also came up in Jessi's Baby-sitter, when Jessi's ten minutes late and said that she would have called if she was 30 minutes late, but not for ten minutes. Who decides these things? It's all about a slope, isn't it?
How long is Kristy going to be away for? Abby's making sweeping changes, like cutting dues.
Instead of calling Stacey at home, Emily Bernstein calls Stacey at a BSC meeting to say she saw Robert with another girl. Are the McGill's not listed in the phone book? I guess TECHNICALLY they haven't been in Stoneybrook a year, so they might not be listed.
Stacey wears sunglasses to spy on Robert at the mall. And Claudia is like, "take those glasses off, you look ridiculous." CLAUDIA.
Robert and Pete Black go see a romantic movie together. Maybe he's into Pete Black.
Abby goes overboard on this Mexican festival, spending the BSC's money and then her own, and insisting that the members pay her back. And then makes posters (with Caludia Butterfly in charge of spelling) without knowing where the festival will be held, and then tells the kids it's a race to finish the posters. She's really not cut out for this.
The New York part doesn't really get going until Chapter 9. Until then, it's just baby-sitting and paranoia.
Stacey and her dad have this long, awkward converation about her relationship with Robert while they're in the Metropolitan Museum of Art. Not only is it awkward to be talking about this stuff with your dad (especially since you still have anger at him over the divorce), but can you imagine what it must be like for the other people there?
Ethan, Stacey's soon-to-be beau, has deep blue eyes, long black hair, high cheekbones, a straight nose, and a wide mouth. Hot?
Claudia saw Robert kissing Andi - on the lips! Cue Saved by the Bell audience-style "ooooo-oooo"
For all of her sports experiences, Abby isn't really a team player, is she?
Stacey and Robert break up. He didn't want to do it earlier, because he wasn't sure about what was going with Andi and he didn't want to upset her. Real nice, Robert.
Stacey decides that she's sadder but wiser, and that she'll live. Yay.

Final Thought: Stacey's little headshot on the cover is really unfortunate. She's all jaw and teeth. Not that the cover picture does her any pictures, either.

Little Sister #34: Karen's Snow Day

2009-07-15T19:26:00.000-07:00

Tagline: Hurray! No school today!

Cover: Karen, Hannie and Nancy build a snowman, and pretend his name is Parson Brown.

Plot!: Karen is obsessed with having a snow day. She listens to the radio every morning and makes a list of the perfect snow day activities. Meanwhile, Karen's stepbrothers Charlie and Sam have started snowblowing driveways, and they enlist Karen to drum up business. She goes overboard, of course, and when she does get a snow day she has to spend it helping out Charlie and Sam because they are overbooked, and she is too tired to do her activities. But that's okay, because the next day her school boiler is broken and school is closed, so the Three Musketeers have their snow day after all.

Points of Interest:

The book starts out with one of Kristy's Great IdeasTM: A reading party in the big house den. And all of the family shows up. Because Sam, Charlie, and even Nannie have nothing better to do on a Saturday afternoon. Is this really how big families act?
I think I might have mentioned this in the other Karen book that I blogged about, but I have no idea what the timeline is for when her parents split up. In this book, she says that she lived at the big house when she was younger than Andrew, who is four (in this book). Watson is already dating Elizabeth when Karen is six. Does she remember her parents together? Does Andrew?
One of Karen's annoying habbits is saying "Guess what" before she says something that's supposed to shock you (like she has a pet rat, or she and Ricky are pretend married).
Isn't Hannie pretend married, too? I thought something like that was mentioned once.
Karen gets really excited about inviting her teacher to dinner. I don't remember inviting my teachers to dinner, but I know at least one of my sister's teachers did.
So Charlie and Sam have a snowblower and want to start a snowclearing business, but they're nervous about calling up people and asking for work. And they agree to let Karen do it. Why wouldn't they ask Kristy, who has her own business? And is older than seven?
Then when Karen finds them more clients, they are all booked. But they don't think to tell Karen this, so she keeps on finding customers for them. Charlie and Sam KNOW what Karen is like - why wouldn't they say "Karen, thanks, that's enough?" Why are these books full of dumb misunderstandings because people don't communicate with each other?
The time span of Karen books can really vary, especially if it's a book with big-house weekends. In the early ones, a whole book could be about a day. This one spans about six weeks. Not like time matters anyway.
Karen gets to choose what she wants for dinner with Ms. Colman. She chooses a salad with artichoke hearts. When I was seven, I would have chosen something like hot dogs.
When they are expecting a blizzard, there's a mention of the events around Snowbound.
Just on a general note, snow days were pretty awesome. So was getting to go home early because of the weather.
When Charlie and Sam don't show up, the clients call Karen. I'm not sure why - why wouldn't they call Charlie and Sam? They're all practically neighbours of the Brewer/Thomas house. Also, even if they didn't know them, they would know she was Karen Brewer...did Karen give them her number?
Oh yeah, Karen lined up all of these new clients...and then didn't tell Charlie and Sam. So they're pissed, and they make the Three Musketeers come over and help them out, which ruins their snow day. Also, I'm surprised that Karen's mom lets her go over to the big house on a little house day.
Karen's snow day is ruined, and Ms. Colman has to cancel their dinner because of the snow. But then, because this is Karen and Karen always gets what she wants (including charging a manicure to her Dad's credit card in Baby-Sitters on Board), the next day her school is closed because of a boiler problem and Ms. Colman can come to dinner. Ugh.
The snowman on the cover's name is actually Dudley.
When she comes to dinner, Ms. Colman announces to these relative strangers that she is getting married: "That is why I have been so busy lately. The wedding will be several months from now. After the wedding I will go away for awhile for our honeymoon. But then I will come back to school. Oh, and my name will still be Ms. Colman." Well, thanks for clearing that up in the least realistic speaking manner possible.

Final Thought: Is it wrong that I was actually kind of disappointed when Karen got her snow day?

# 14: Hello, Mallory

2009-07-13T10:06:00.000-07:00

Tagline: Why are the Baby-sitters making it so hard for Mallory to join their club?

Cover: Because the girls can be cliquey bitches when they want to be. This is Mallory's first book, and unlike Dawn and Abby, she gets to narrate a story before she's even officially in the club. By the way, I always say this title like Jerry's saying "Hello, Newman" in Seinfeld. Is that a cat on Claudia's shoulder? Oh, no, it's just her hair (but I could totally see Claudia wearing a stuffed cat on her shoulder, like a parrot). I think it's the Perkins girls that are on the cover with them - RoboToddler Gabbie and The Amazing Myriah.

Plot!: Stacey has just moved away back to New York, and the BSC is looking to replace her. They have already asked Mallory to consider joining, so this one picks up just before Mallory meets with them. They make her take a test, which she flunks because it's ridiculously hard, and observe her sitting, and Claudia makes her so nervous that that's a bust, too. So she quits before she even joins. While this is going on, a new student starts as MSS. It's Jessi Ramsay, and hold on to your hats, guys - she's black! She and Mallory bond over horse stories and feeling like outsiders, and even try their own baby-sitting club before the BSC comes crawling back, and they both join.

Points of Interest:

Claire Pike calls her parents Moozie and Daggles.
Okay, here's a new entry on the Mallory hair continuity: all of the Pikes have dark brown hair. Then why is Mallory sometimes a redhead?
While Mallory is baby-sitting, Nicky breaks his finger playing volleyball. I only mention it because it will be important later.
Mallory pictures the BSC members in their cool clothes: brightly coloured sweater dresses, sparkly tops, and tight pants. Hot.
Speaking of hot, Mallory wears a red jumper with MALLORY across the front (oh, please tell me that all the Pikes have clothes with their names on it), a short-sleeved white blouse, and white tights with hearts on them.
When Mallory gets to school, she sees Jessi for the first time, and of course she notices Jessi's loooooong legs, even though Jessi's probably wearing jeans or something. Also, she calls Jessi beautiful.
Proud moments in Stoneybrook history: the homeroom teacher doesn't ask Jessi to introduce herself, Benny Ott shoots rubber bands at Jessi, the English teacher pretends he doesn't see Benny Ott shooting rubber bands at Jessi, Sally (a sixth grade girl) says that Jessi doesn't belong here, Anita (another sixth grader) thinks that Jessi moved from Africa, and Sally (again) thinks that her real name Mobobwee.
When Mallory arrives at her first BSC meeting, both she and the BSC members act like they don't know her at all. They've been baby-sitting for the Pikes for ages! Mallory even went to Sea City with Mary Anne. This is dumb.
Mallory tells them about Nicky's accident, and the club reacts like Mallory just told them she spent the afternoon drowning animals in the toilet. They tell her they need responsible sitters - even though a kid was KIDNAPPED while Dawn was baby-sitting, the four originals ruined Jamie Newton's birthday party with their fighting, Logan's first job with Jackie Rodowsky was nothing BUT accidents, and Jenny Pereziosso had to go to the hospital while Mary Anne was sitting (which wasn't her fault, but neither was Nicky's finger).
Also, Dawn says that they need responsible sitters because they've had trouble in the past. But the whole Baby-Sitters Agency thing (that I think Dawn is talking about) happened BEFORE Dawn joined. Which would make the last full-time regular sitter who joined Dawn. Of all of them, I would think that Dawn would be the most sympathetic to Mallory.
The next day, Mallory dresses down and wears a shirt that says "I'd rather be writing my novel." I know it's casual and everything, but if you're trying to join this group, why would you advertise that you'd rather be doing something else?
Jessi's birthday is June 13th. Mark that on your calendars.
At this point, Mallory doesn't have braces yet. It's a wonder there wasn't a Very Special Episode about Mal's braces.
At one point (on a non-meeting day) Mr. Perkins calls Claudia to say that Mrs. Perkins has had a new baby (Laura Elizabeth). Apparently, the reason is to arrange some extra baby-sitting or something. But don't these people have adult friends? Why is he calling a 13-year old girl?
The BSC members give Mallory a ridiculous test based on things they read out of textbooks. One of the things was to draw a diagram of the digestive system. She should have turned it around on them and asked Claudia how to spell digestive system. Considering Claudia calls it the divestive system, I think Mallory would have a good case.
Mallory and Jessi bond over horse books. And their feelings of being outsiders. Because racism is totally the same as not being allowed to join the BSC.
According to Jessi's mom, Jessi is Squirt's second mother. Gah? She's 11! I get what she's trying to say, but it still seems weird.
When Jessi comes over to the Pikes, Claire almost asks if she's come to clean their house. Awkward.
Mallory and Jessi decide that to start their own sitting club: Kids Incorporated. They baby-sit AND sing songs:
Dawn is pleased that Mrs. Barrett has finally found a woman to help her with her cleaning. That...doesn't seem like any of Dawn's business.
Dawn wonders why, if Mrs. Pike needed a baby-sitter, she didn't call the BSC. Well, maybe because you were just pretty terrible to her daughter. And if the BSC thought that Mallory was old enough to sit, why wouldn't Mrs. Pike? And if Mallory was the co-sitter, why would the BSC want to co-sit with her? It seems like the question is, why would Mrs. Pike call the BSC?
On page 116, the BSC members FINALLY remember that Mallory helped out the mothers' helpers in Sea City and at their Summer Camp.
Before joining the club, Jessi says that she's afraid her blackness is going to be an issue. After THINKING ABOUT IT FOR AWHILE, the rest of the BSC says that if it is, they'll deal with it later. Seriously, they have to think about letting her join, because she's black. Who would have thought that only twenty years from then, the US would have Barack Obama as president.
On Mallory's do-over sitting job at the Newtons', Claudia sat down at the table and tried to look invisible. How...do you do that? Close your eyes?
In the end, it's assumed that Mallory and Jessi join the club, partly because they're good sitters and partly because the club is desperate.

Final Thought: Racism is bad. But so is a jumper with your name on it.

#36: Jessi's Baby-sitter

2009-07-10T18:20:00.000-07:00

Tagline: Jessi doesn't need a baby-sitter - she is one!

Cover: This one has been updated to show that we're not in the late 80's/early 90's anymore. Jessi is wearing a blue sweater with strange colours and patterns all over it. Her un-slouched socks make her loooooong dancer's legs look really kind of stumpy. Becca looks a bit like she was inspired by Ashley from the Fresh Prince of Bel-Air. Aunt Cecelia looks...pretty much what she's supposed to look like. In the update, everyone's the same but Jessi: she has a new sweater, a new hairstyle, new socks, and a new expression. It's more "This is soooooo unfair" than the original book's "Die, bitch."

Plot!: There are some baby-sitters club books that make you want to throw them against the wall for one reason or another. A character does something that goes completely out of character, they do something improbable, there's a giant event that involves a lot of babysitting and/or some fun thing for their 'charges.' With this one, I just want to keep yelling "You're 11!" over and over, much like Luca in the BSC movie yells "Thirteen!" in the cab.

Anyway. Jessi is 11. Her mom decides to go back to work, so Aunt Cecelia moves in to help look after the children - because there are three children. And Jessi and Becca don't like it, so they play pranks on her and call her Aunt Dictator. Then finally they confront their parents and it all works out because the parents let Jessi go to her BSC meetings and tell Aunt Cecelia to lighten up. Meanwhile, Jessi helps Jackie Rodowsky make a volcano for his science fair project, but does it all for him, and it's pretty much a train wreck. Also, the Pike kids open up a library for a chapter.

Points of Interest:

Do 11 year olds really dance en pointe? Aren't they still growing?
When her Dad says that they have exciting news, Jessi thinks that her parents might be pregnant and is really thrilled. This has happened to at least Kristy, Dawn and Mary Anne. Really? Especially given the not-so-happy reaction Jessi had with Squirt in The Baby-Sitters Remember...but I guess that bit of history hasn't been written yet.
Do you think advertising is really a 9-5 type of job? I picture people pulling all-nighters, trying to meet deadlines and redoing copy and stuff. Then again, I also picture Mad Men, so I doubt that's what Jessi's Mom's new job is like.
Jessi's sign on the door:
KEEP OUT (please)
THIS MEANS YOU
PRIVACY NEEDED
(THANK YOU FOR YOUR COOPERATION)
Who is her audience? Becca? Her parents? Squirt?
Jackie wants to make a volcano because he saw it on the Brady Bunch. As far as old tv references go, I will let this one go, because the Brady Bunch was airing all the time on stations like TBS around this time.
When Jessi and Jackie go to the library, Claudia's mom, the head librarian, is just hanging out there. She has a lot of desk hours for the head librarian - wouldn't she have a lot of meetings and committees and stuff? Maybe she's the head librarian because she's the only librarian. Anyway, she greets them with "What are you doing here?" Friendly.
Why would the BSC convince Jackie, the walking disaster, to build a volcano made of clay and glass? I'm all for encouraging him, but this seems kind of dangerous. When his mom comes home, she's all "Great, Jessi, why don't you help him with this instead of me? Good luck with that!"
The Pike kids opening up their own lending library. As far as Pike kid plots go, it's the kind of thing I can see a big family doing together, especially when they're fairly close in age like that. It wouldn't work so well in Kristy's family, for instance, with the age variance from Emily Michelle to Charlie. I could see Karen trying something like it, though, maybe with Hannie and Nancy. Anyway, it's only a chapter long, and it's kind of memorable, so long story short: this is the book with the lending library.
Jessi calls Aunt Cecelia "Aunt Dictator" because she dared to bring her own belongings when she moved into their house, she told the girls to get ready for bed, and she made them breakfast. That night, Jessi and Becca short-sheet her bed, fill her slippers with shaving cream, and put a spider on her pillow. Yeah, that's totally a fair response, and going to convince her parents that she should be in charge.
Okay, I have to take a time-out here to talk about Jessi's parents. Most of the trouble here could have been avoided if they had taken any time to talk to Aunt Cecelia about the new situation. They know Jessi is defensive about being a baby-sitter, so why wouldn't they start off by saying, "Cecelia, don't call yourself Jessi's baby-sitter." And one of the reasons that Aunt Cecelia is hard on Jessi is because of her baby-sitting schedule and not knowing where she is. Again, why wouldn't the parents set some ground rules? Talk about who's in charge, and privileges, and routines and stuff? All of this is covered at the end of the book, and it's true that Aunt Cecelia is a dominating personality, but really, if the Ramseys had thought about it for half a second, it wouldn't have been so stupid.
Mr. Ramsey has a secretary named Ed?
Charlotte does an experiment to see what music plants grow to best, and the winner is the plant that listened to Duran Duran. Awesome.
Jessi learns a valuable lesson from helping Jackie with his science project: volcanoes are almost always more trouble than they're worth.
Oh, BARF. Aunt Cecelia confesses that she's afraid she's not as good a baby-sitter as Jessi. GAH. This is just so dumb. She's already raised children!
Style alert! Mal has high-tops with beaded designs on the sides. Fresh.
David Michael's ribbon from the science fair is hanging over his bed. In Kristy's Big Day, the Thomases had a trophy table/wall in their house, and they wondered if they'd have one at Watson's. I guess not.
The BSC is really hard on Jessi about the whole Jackie fiasco. Yeah, she made a mistake, but AGAIN, she's 11. And the rest of the BSC did a variation on this in Little Miss Stoneybrook...and Dawn, so, deal. When Jessi says that Jackie doesn't want her help next year, Kristy says "I don't blame him." Nice.
Foreshadowing! Mallory is worried about her dad's job (#39, Poor Mallory!) and Stacey tells Dr. Johanssen that her diabetes has been hard to control lately (#43, Stacey's Emergency)

Final Thought: Ads in the back of the book include the BSC board game, a t-shirt, a 1991 calendar, a contest to win a trip to New York in honour of the next Super Special (the answer is California), a 1990-91 School Planner and Date Book, an announcement of a winner of a previous contest, and BSC Videos. It really was quite a moneymaker, eh?

Sidebar: New Acquisitions

2009-07-08T21:59:00.000-07:00

A recent trip to Value Village unearthed some non-BSC BSC books, and I just couldn't say no:

Friends Forever #3: Mary Anne's Big Breakup
Friends Forever #4: Claudia and the Friendship Feud
Friends Forever #5: Kristy Power!
Little Sister #4: Karen's Kittycat Club
Little Sister #34: Karen's Snowy Day
Little Sister #70: Karen's Grandad
California Diaries #2 Sunny Diary One
California Diaries #3 Maggie Diary One
California Diaries #4 Amalia Diary One
California Diaries #9 Amalia Diary Two
The Kids in Ms. Colman's Class #1: Teacher's Pet

I'm most interested in the Friends Forever books, because it's directly related to the BSC. I've never read any of the Amalia Diaries, and I can take or leave the Little Sisters. And in this case, I took them.

There were a lot of BSC books there too, mostly early ones (below #10), and I left those. I did group them all together, though, just in case another intrepid BSC reader came along behind me.

Mystery #26: Dawn Schafer, Undercover Baby-Sitter

2009-07-05T16:17:00.000-07:00

Tagline: Dawn's a detective in disguise...as a baby-sitter!

Cover: Actually, Dawn's a baby-sitter...who just likes to snoop around in other people's business. And that's pretty evident in this cover. She's only vaguely paying attention to the kids, to make sure they don't see her going through their mothers' stuff. And it's not even like, looking at the desk to see what's out there...she's going through a little box of stuff! Unbelievable. Other than that, Dawn looks a little off but not as bad as some covers, and it looks like Hodges Soileau just skimmed through the book for the cover: portrait? check! red-haired kids? check! uncomfortable looking house? check!

Plot!: Dawn's in Stoneybrook for one of their many summers, but it's already coming to a close. Before she leaves, she takes a semi-regular job with a new family who are living in a mysterious mansion. The three Livingstone sisters are trying to solve a mystery in order to claim their inheritance, and of course the BSC has to get involved (because two of the sisters hire sitters to come and watch the kids while they're out doing...stuff? Solving the mystery? I don't know). So they do, not only solving the mystery but also repairing the broken family dynamic. Meanwhile, Dawn overbooks herself because that's what the plot demands of her, and she's finding it hard to say goodbye to everyone because Dawn is just so awesome everyone in the whole town wants a piece of her before she leaves. So she says goodbye in groups, and eventually moves the whole town with her heart. No, that's actually what the last line of the book: "Because I would be moving the whole town out there - in my heart."

Points of Interest:

As far as mysteries goes, this one at least makes sense, because there is a mystery but it's not ridiculous, in the sense that it could happen. What is ridiculous is that the BSC gets so involved in it and the family lets them, and also that the family hasn't already solved it.
I think I've touched on this before, but 'steady boyfriend' is one of those stock BSC phrases that I just don't get. What teenage girl uses that? It seems really out of date.
In terms of chronology, this one takes place just after the Super Special Aloha, Babysitters! But then at the end of the book, Kristy and her family go to Hawaii too, which I think is mentioned in the rest of the series. This is probably also the summer of Dawn and Too Many Sitters, the terrible experiment where Jeff and the Pike Triplets join the BSC.
"Mary Anne and Richard aren't above eating a steak once in a while, or ordering their pizza with extra pepperoni." Thanks, Dawn.
Dawn is using cosmetics that haven't been tested on animals: "After all, why should some fluffy little bunny suffer so I can be beautiful?"
Both Erica Blumberg and Emily Bernstein make plans with Dawn to do stuff before she leaves. I didn't know they were this close. Dawn didn't really have a chance to make other friends before she was taken in by the Cult of the BSC, and since then she's only really socialized with them. I know they're friendly, but Dawn starts blowing plans with like, Mary Anne to accomodate these people? This is a stupid plot-driven plot.
For the Chapter Two set up, Dawn takes "memory pictures" of the club. But Mallory and Jessi have to share one - they don't even rate their own memories!
The BSC goes against the wishes of the Livingstone sisters (now Mrs. Keats and Mrs. Cornell) and bring their children to play together. In addition to having a reputation for being good sitters, the BSC should have a reputation for being enormous buttinskis.
Okay, this was when I almost threw the book down in disgust. Dawn, in planning all of her 'before I leave' stuff, made plans to go to the pool complex with Matt and Haley Braddock. Not as a baby-sitter...just...because. What? I mean, I guess it's no different than Claudia going to the museum with Corrie Addison and the Arnold twins, but still...it's just such a different mindset from the one I have.
Also, in order to facilitate this "Dawn is just too popular for her own good" plot, she also overbooks herself, forgets appointments, and in general acts very unlike the regular orderly, organized Dawn. She acts a lot like her mom does with keys and shoes.
Ugh. At one point, Dawn sees a check signed by A. Livingstone and immediately assumes that Arthur Livingstone, the dead man, is alive. Rather than thinking that it was signed by Amy Livingstone, who is still alive. OR it was a post-dated cheque. This book is full of "red herrings."
Each sister got a clue from Arthur Livingstone that would help them find the treasure. The clues are: "The first is always the most important," "The signature tells all," and "I didn't do it, I was _______." The first two are kind of obscure, but doesn't the third one give it away? What else could it be? Set up? Innocent? In Europe at the time?
Oh, and the butler is really their brother. Their father had told them he was dead, but Amy was in touch with him the whole time. That is really messed up. But then later, Mrs. Keats says that she wanted to find him but the father said to forget about him. So...huh?
Anyway, the mystery is solved, because the answer is behind a really ugly portrait of Mr. Livingstone. And they decide to split the estate four ways. Hurrah.
Yawn. Another BSC party for the charges.
On page 122 it says that Jamie Newton ate three cupcakes and then asked Dawn to marry him (heh, he was sugar-drunk!), but on page 123, it says Claudia matched Nicky by eating three cupcakes. Which is it?
At Dawn's party for her friends, it's BSC members, Emily Bernstein, and Mari Drabek. Who?
OMG! The BSC members skip their meeting because they're at Dawn's, partying. You know that shit would not happen if Kristy was not in Hawaii with her family.
OMG II! Dawn eats some Ben & Jerry's ice cream and does not lecture about sugar content or having teeth when she's 90.
The next day she has Family Day, where the Schafer-Spiers do things like: eat breakfast! eat lunch! and eat dinner! Pretty wild.

Final Thought: This is the last book narrated by Dawn in the BSC series. Farewell, Dawn.

#50: Dawn's Big Date

2009-07-01T14:26:00.000-07:00

Happy Canada Day! Sadly, The BSC Wiki isn't giving me many Canada references...I think Lisa and Seth Engle go to Nova Scotia or something once, and Pierre D'Amboise is almost from Canada, which sort of counts. Anyway. Since there's nothing else, let's continue on (redundant!) with another book:

Tagline: Is Dawn's date a total disaster?

Cover: In a word...yes. Dawn looks okay but not at all California Casual, or denimy, which is how we know she's not herself. Mary Anne is rocking the soon-to-be soccer mom look, which goes nicely with Logan's ken doll blandness. Lewis, his cousin and Dawn's date, is glaring at Dawn, which seems kind of rude, and I hope it was just a glance and not how he spent the whole movie. The background looks really kind of creepy - lots of blurry faces, one that looks kind of like Dustin Hoffman, a girl over Logan's shoulder that is totally staring at the foursome, and lots of old-fashioned haircuts.

Plot!: Dawn's been writing to Lewis, Logan's cousin, and they kind of like each other. He comes to town, and Dawn gets nervous, so she decides to completely change her personality. Nobody likes it, so she changes back, they start over, and they get along okay. In subplot land, Norman Hill is fat, and the baby-sitters try to get him to drink water and not down entire bags of cookies. Which they do, by telling him to pretend that he's a toilet. Garbage in, garbage out.

Points of Interest:

Okay, I have to make a confession: I like tofu. It's true, I do. I also eat meat (I'm eating a hamburger as I write this, so take that, Dawn), but I really enjoy tofu. I starting eating it while I was at school, in the residence dining hall, and it was in food and I didn't really know it, but I liked the texture and the taste. I guess that makes me a weirdo like Dawn.
Having said all that, I still would not serve tofu apple nut loaf or soybean pie at a party.
Dawn on hot dogs: yick! Okay, this is like the third time it's come up: who says yick? I don't think I've ever said it. Yuck, ick, yes. Come on, ghostwriters!
They're planning for a New Year's Eve party. I love the whole Christmas season. I can't even snark on this one too much...okay, that's a lie, because this one is totally snarkable, but I am having a general good feeling as I'm reading it just because I love the Christmas season so much.
Wait. The BSC is having a New Year's Eve party? No one in Stoneybrook needed a sitter for New Year's Eve? Not even their own families? What?
Here's the Dawn we all "love": Other girls are always saying I should be a model or an actress. They say, "Oh, I wish I had your silky hair." Or, "I'd die to have your skin." (They might have good hair and skin if they didn't eat so much junk food.) Enough people have told me I'm pretty, so I should believe it.
Kristy is tense because Mary Anne and Dawn are late to the meeting. Dawn says that she's also jealous of Dawn because of her friendship/step-sistership with Mary Anne. I wish that had been a bit more explored in the series.
Jessi eats caramel-covered popcorn? What about being a fat ballerina?
Dawn puts up a cardboard New Year's Baby with a banner that says 1979, because she's just that offbeat. Also: why do they have a cardboard New Year's Baby with a banner that says 1979? I doubt it's Richard's, and if it's Sharon's, that means that she moved it all across the country. Maybe it has sentimental attachment...in this book, it's 1992, so Dawn would have been born in 1979(ish). Aaaaand now I've officially given too much thought to a throwaway detail.
Would a vegetarian eat caviar? That's what Watson and Elizabeth send to Richard and Sharon.
Stacey wore a form-fitting purple dress. To a sleepover.
Claudia thinks that Arthur Feingold has gorgeous hair. Mallory thinks that Ben Hobart has an adorable nose.
Dawn doesn't have much to add to the conversation, because no boy has made her go crazy. Well, except for Travis. I think Dawn should start paying more attention to this whole 'change herself for a guy' pattern.
At midnight, the BSC decides to call boys. Claudia calls the mysterious Arthur Feingold, Stacey calls Pete Black, Kristy calls Bart, and Mary Anne calls Logan. Dawn hangs out near the finger foods with Mallory and Jessi.
Ugh. Dawn's resolution is to be more attractive to boys. It's almost as bad as Mary Anne, who resolves to be more outgoing so that Logan will be happier. Everyone else makes resolutions based on what they want, but these two frame it in this terrible way. I hate this book.
Reading this now, it's almost like Norman Hill is doing something dirty in his room...and then it turns out to be eating cupcakes.
If the parents really want Norman to lose weight, why do they have all of this junk food in the house? And why do they have to go to such an extreme, cooking with kale and okra? Why can't they just eat like, lettuce and vegetables and lean meats and stuff? This doesn't make sense.
So not only does Dawn totally change her appearance, she also starts acting like a jerk and starts dumbening herself down. Double ugh.
Ooooh. She's blowing bubbles during the BSC meeting...she's such a badass!
None of the BSC members like her makeover (except Mary Anne). Big surprise! These girls hate everything that isn't part of the same old box they're all in.
Dawn decides to dress like Avril Lavigne to pick up Lewis: she wears black ballet slippers, black lace capris, a short metallic silver skirt with crinoliny stuff, a stretchy tight, black and white striped top, six bangle bracelets, feather earrings, and hoop earrings.
Mary Anne is totally acting like Dawn's pimp, getting her a makeover, telling her to be more talkative, giving her conversation tips.
Oh my Lord. On their double date, they go see Gone with the Wind. Just like every ordinary 13-year old wants to go see. Nothing is more romantic than the Civil War.
There's a big spoiler in here about GWTW, too. Strange.
OMG! Dawn realizes, after a big fight with Mary Anne, that Lewis just likes her for who she is! Makeup and sweatpant-skirts are evil!
BUT Dawn acts like this is all Mary Anne's fault, because Mary Anne didn't bow down before the altar of Dawn and say stuff like, "On no, Dawn, you're too gorgeous to change! You're special and magical and beautiful and you should never do anything differently." Barf.

Final thought: Something that is covered in cheese sauce doesn't really sound that healthy. Food can be made of vegetables and cheese and still not be healthy, DAWN.

Bonus: Little Sister #4: Karen's Kittycat Club

2009-06-29T21:19:00.000-07:00

Tagline: Karen has a club now, too!

Cover: I have a few Little Sister books around here, so I thought that I might as well blog those, too. I started out with the Little Sister books and then moved up to the BSC. I guess I just got used to Karen, because she doesn't annoy me as much as she does other readers of the series(es). But this book is pretty annoying. I'll get to that. The cover....the orange checkerboard is very overwhelming. I can barely even read "Little Sister." Hannie has red hair? And I think we need to stage a pigtail intervention for her. Amanda Delaney looks appropriately princessy, but no way is the cat that Karen's holding Boo Boo.

Plot!: Hannie's family gets a new pet, a cat...and Karen realizes that now she and Hannie and Amanda all have pets. So she decides to form the Kittycat Club, because....she wants a club. I guess? But they don't know what to do, so they decide to cat-sit, but they don't get a job, partly because no one needs a cat-sitter and also because no one needs a six year old cat-sitter. Karen's other friend, Nancy, is jealous because she can't join the club. It's pretty much a failure on all sides. So the club folds and Karen starts a Fun Club, and that's a success. For this one book, and then is never mentioned again.

Points of Interest:

Hey, did you know that Karen is a Two-Two? She has two of everything!
"Mommy and Seth's house is little." Yeah, because she's not a millionaire like Watson. I wonder though if it is really little or just little compared to a mansion. It's in the same neighbourhood as Nancy's house, and I never got the feeling that it was a shack, but the way that Karen describes it it kind of sounds like it.
Karen rationalizes that Shannon (the dog) likes David Michael more than her because she sees David Michael more than her. Because NO ONE would ever not like Karen just because.
Karen decides that The Kittycat Club is a purr-fect name for her lame club.
Karen always has the same lunch: an apple, a celery stick with peanut butter, chips and milk. It feels like it's missing the main part.
Hannie making fun of Amanda's four hundred dollar cat never gets old. Of all of the musketeers, I think Hannie has the most potential.
Karen and Nancy fight a lot in these early books. This isn't as dumb as the Karen-Nancy sleepover fight, because Nancy has a point in this one at least, but it's still drawn-out.
The club almost has a job...but it turns out that the woman who called them thought that Karen was actually Katie Bower, sixteen. If this woman can't even read a children's jumbo print flyer, how is she managing on her own? How does she read labels, on food or medication? Someone needs to be called about this.
In Karen's Big House room, she has Moosie, Tickly nineteen stuffed animals, and seven dolls. And this is the room that she lives in for two days, every other week.
Karen practically starts sobbing at the song 'Does your chewing gum lose its flavor on the bedpost overnight?': "I was nearly in tears. Imagine losing the flavor of your chewing gum."
Nancy got upset with Karen because Karen started the Kittycat Club with Hannie and left Nancy out of it. So when Karen wants to start the Fun Club, she goes to Nancy....and leaves Hannie out of it. I don't think she's actually learned anything from this.
People who come to the Fun Club who we never hear from again: Heather, Nina, Kim, and Vicky. They're "girls from school."
Karen decides that the Fun Club is a success. It kind of is a Kristy-like thing to do - take something ordinary like playing and turn it into a big giant deal.

Final thought: I wish there was a book about Watson and Lisa's marriage. I picture it as being like one of Judy Blume's adult books.

#78: Claudia and Crazy Peaches

2009-06-28T12:20:00.000-07:00

Tagline: Claudia's aunt Peaches is back. Let the games begin!

Cover: Yes...those crazy waiter games! The cover depicts a scene from the book, where Claudia and Crazy Peaches make (or buy?) dinner for the family, then dress up like waiters. But why does Claudia have something like a plain black vest? That's not crazy! Maybe Peaches brought it...it's not quite clear. Anyway. Aside from looking like they've maybe poisoned the family, this cover is pretty unremarkable.

Plot!: Peaches and Russ move back to Stoneybrook, and they are also expecting a baby. Claudia gets really excited and spends lots of time with Crazy Peaches, because she's just so much fun. But then Claudia needs some time to herself, and Peaches doesn't take that well, and they have a fight. Then Peaches loses the baby, and Claudia is convinced it's her fault. But they make up, and Peaches and Russ decide to start trying again soon for another baby. In the subplot, Natalie Springer becomes a BSC charge, and she's friendless, and becomes clingy with Claudia, so the BSC starts a Friendship Campaign for Natalie (no, really).

Points of Interest:

"Have you ever ahd one of those tingly feelings - the kind that tells you something is going to happen, but you're not sure what or when or where?" I feel like Claudia is oversharing here.
There's a Wizard of Oz reference on the second page. It's starting to become like I Love Lucy!
Thankfully, Claudia describes her own skin as "clear," not "creamy."
At the beginning of the book, Claudia is already really behind in her English class. I almost want to tell her not to bother catching up, because she's going to fail anyway (at least one of the times she finishes the eighth grade).
I wonder how old Peaches is, and what the age difference is between her and Claudia's mom. Peaches and Russ met in College, according to a story Peaches tells Claudia in one of the Friends Forever books, and Claudia has only ever known her as Peaches. So if she was 20 when she met Russ, let's say Claudia was born around that time, Peaches would be in her early 30s. Claudia's parents have always seemed older than that to me.
According to Claudia, Bart is "crazy" about Kristy. There's a lot of craziness in this book. Also: really?
So Russ and Peaches, who is two months pregnant, are going to move into Claudia's house for awhile, and immediately the BSC goes crazy (theme?) with plans - Kristy's going to keep her fit, Jessi is going to force her to listen to classical music, Mallory is going to monitor her journal writing. I would have politely told these kids where to stuff it.
The Natalie subplot is boring. It seems like the BSC is always trying to change kids to get other kids to like them.
Russ calls Peaches "little mother." I'm glad he doesn't have facebook, or else I might have to submit him to STFU, Marrieds or STFU, Parents.
Claudia and Peaches spend gobs of money on baby furniture, supplies, and clothing...and she's still only two months pregnant! Who does this? They're not even living in their new house yet!
They go to see Bringing Up Baby, because they think it's about a baby. It's not, but they love it anyway. Because Claudia, who is barely literate, really love old black-and-white movies from the 1930s. (Bringing up Baby is a good movie, and it's totally logical that a teenager might like it, because I liked it myself when I was around 13...I just don't see Claudia as a big fan. She'd like color movies, like a big splashy musical...or The Wizard of Oz.)
Are you ready for your stereotypes? The Italian man at the gourmet shop is called Guiseppe DeSalvio and he looks just like Chef Boyardee. He speaks English, except for words like "signorina" and "bambino."
Ugh. As if we haven't had our fill of old movies, the flower stand (a flower stand?) is called Zuzu's Petals.
Heh. Claudia's gym teacher told her that sparkle socks were inappropriate for gym class. But doesn't she know that Claudia is an artist?
Peaches calls Claudia a sulky teenager. Normally I'm on the side of the grownups in these things, but Peaches seems really...immature. She wants Claudia to blow off school to look at wallpaper or something, and isn't able to look at people beyond herself. She seems really ill-equipped to be dealing with parenthood.
Claudia immediately thinks that because she was mad at Peaches, she caused the miscarriage, just like she thinks she caused Mimi's stroke. I want to say that it's really self-important of her, but it's kind of true of people to think like that.
Stacey has a new hat that she's really proud of: it's velvet, with patches of different colours, and has cool beadwork around the brim. Sure.

Final Thoughts: Since I haven't read it yet, you can get a perspective on this book's follow-up Claudia and the World's Cutest Baby over at Dibbly Fresh.

#62: Kristy and the Worst Kid Ever

2009-06-27T09:33:00.000-07:00

Tagline: Need a sitter for Lou? Don't call the Baby-sitters!

Cover: Kristy looks like she's adopting the same baby-sitting strategy as Dawn in Dawn and the Impossible Three. But nevermind that - I want to talk about the Papadakis children. Compare and contrast to Welcome to the BSC, Abby below. Hannie's still rocking the pigtails (which is consistent with her Little Sister character, too), but she doesn't look Chinese. Linny, on the other hand, looks about five, and he has a much different skin colour than his sister, Hannie (dropped adoption plot?). Why is that dog all over the furniture? The Papadakises have a poodle (named Noodle). Is that covered in the book? And Lou could not look more butch if she tried, which I guess she is trying to do. Why does her sweater have an elbow patch, though? Maybe it's because she's poor. But when I see that, I don't think 'poor,' I think 'academic.' Finally, the book acts as a kind of historical record - someday people will see it and ask "did people really have televisions that looked like that?"

Plot!: The Papadakis family takes in a foster child - Lou (and don't call her Louisa). She has difficulty adjusting because she misses her mom (who ran off), and her father (who is dead) and her brother (in a different home). So the BSC tries to figure her out. Meanwhile, they are having an auction at SMS to benefit...something, and people are bringing in fancy items. So the BSC decide to get celebrity items to sell, as well as baby-sitting hours. And they worry that the items won't come, but they do, and they're a big hit. Yay.

Points of Interest:

My copy, which I bought used, has the following inscription: "Dearest Ashley, Happy Easter Dear, all my love, Nana." Poor Nana.
In a strange bit of continuity, Sam has his job delivering groceries for the A&P, which was mentioned in Kristy's Big Day, and maybe other places. But how does a fifteen year old with no car deliver groceries? On his bike? Walking? It makes no sense, ANM!
Boo Boo, Watson's cat, has gray fur and terrible yellow eyes.
Hannie and Linny and Karen and David Michael discuss whether they want a girl foster kid or a boy foster kid. With Lou, they kind of get both.
There are two Wizard of Oz references in the first two chapters. Lazy.
Kristy says Dawn "appears to be easy going," with the implication that she isn't, which might be the best description of Dawn in any Chapter Two. She's not California Casual, people!
Logan flexes an arm, and Mary Anne blushes. I like the Mary Anne in the Friends Forever series a LOT better.
The auction is for new computers. That's a lot more realistic than the carnival to fund the arts program in Welcome to the BSC, Abby.
The social worker is "pinch-lipped," because basically every career woman in this series is some kind of uptight unhappy woman.
The BSC makes a big deal about Lou wanting to be called Lou, and not Louisa, which I find strange. Firstly, she's introduced to them as Lou, so it's not like all of a sudden she's like, call me something else. Also: Kristy goes by Kristy, not Kristin, and Stacey doesn't go by Anastasia, Jessi doesn't go by Jessica, Hannie doesn't go by Hannah, and so on. They don't go "I went shopping today with Anastasia, excuse me, Stacey." And they try to make it into another case of Lou being 'difficult.' Please. These thirteen year olds need to chill.
The Papadakis parents aren't doing anything with Lou - she's always either at the Brewer house, not playing with Karen or with a baby-sitter. Shouldn't they be, like, more involved with her? They don't seem prepared or interested in this at all.
I don't know anything about the Craine family at all. Margaret and Sophie and Katie? Who are these people?
The BSC has to do some brainstorming for the auction so they don't feel 'guilty' when then they goof off, eat junk food, and fall asleep at their sleepover. Gah.
Okay, the cover picture actually takes place at the Brewer house, so that's...Boo Boo being held, and Shannon jumping up. MAYBE it's David Michael in front, but that makes even less sense. Speaking of David Michael, I once read a BSC fan fic where he was Watson's biological child. Weird.
Would Lou's social worker really show up and talk to Lou without one of the foster parents there? It seems...dangerous.
Lou and her brother Jay go to live with her aunt and uncle, and she seems okay with this, eventually. The baby-sitters marvel at the change in her, like they had never considered how much this had taken a toll on her and that all of her problems couldn't be solved by playing in Karen's playhouse.
Lorne Conners, some fake artist who won four "Grammies" sent the BSC a T-shirt, autographed, for the auction. They had written to famous people and asked for items. It's kind of like when Zack Morris sells Johnny Dakota doorknobs. Anyway, by some miracle, the items actually arrive in time. In addition to the shirt, they get toe shoes from a ballerina, a boxed set of autographed books, an autographed baseball from a sports team, a blanket from a horse that won the Kentucky Derby, an autographed picture of a track and field athlete, and Cam Geary's jacket.
In my version, Chapter 15 is just in plain type, not in the traditional block letters.
Heh. Watson buys a hand crack phonograph. Dirty!
Logan buys Mary Anne diamond earrings. Too bad there wasn't a diamond ring there - Stacey might have got one for a great price!
I've never understood the ending: Stacey announces that the BSC contributed the highest ticket item of the auction, which is 24 hours of baby-sitting. And Jessi notes that they're worth more than Cam Geary's jacket, which went for more than a hundred dollars. If that is true, and the hours went for more than a hundred dollars, why didn't they mention this during the auction? It's needlessly confusing. To me. And I don't like being confused by ANM.

Final Thought: Has anyone read Abby and the Best Kid Ever, where Lou comes back? I haven't.

Off-Topic: Michael Jackson

2009-06-25T17:35:00.000-07:00

I am having a very hard time processing the news of Michael Jackson's death. I didn't have a specific book planned for today so instead I will just point you in the direction of a Michael Jackson/BSC connection, in case that's how you want to remember him. The BSC Wiki has only one reference (that I could find) for Michael Jackson, on the page for Baby-Sitters on Board! I'm not sure, but I think it's a reference to them seeing the Captain EO show.

#90: Welcome to the BSC, Abby!

2009-06-24T17:27:00.000-07:00

Tagline: No one said it was going to be easy!

Cover: The hidden message of the tagline is "So run, Abby, while you still can!" Yes, this is the first book narrated by Abby Stevenson, the club's new Jewish member. She first shows up in Kristy and the Dirty Diapers, and at the end of that book she's a BSC member. Anyway, on the cover she's baby-sitting for the Papadakis family. Hannie looks Asian. Linny looks tall, but I've always pictured him tall, so that's okay. Sari looks...like she has developmental problems. Also on the cover: Noodle the Poodle, Pat the Cat, and Myrtle the Turtle. Abby is rocking a very mid-90s dress/tights combo with a really long necklace that just seems impractical for baby-sitting.

Plot!: Abby is the BSC's newest member, but she's also asthmatic. She has an attack while sitting for the Papadakis kids, which sets off Kristy's inner judgement monitor, and Abby is worried that they're going to kick her out. So she's all eager about this fund-raiser carnival and handles another asthma attack, and Kristy sees that someone can have allergies and babysit at the same time. In the subplot, it's also about Abby, and about her family. Her dad died a few years ago in a car accident, and she and her twin sister feel like they can't talk about him. But then they find his bathrobe and it gets their mom talking, and they get closer. And in the baby-sitting plot (kind of), there's a carnival to raise money for the arts in schools, and the BSC has a book with buttons and cakes and stuff.

Points of Interest:

Abby calls Kristy a "bossy beast." There's a reason why the Kristy/Abby slashfic writes itself.
Abby's from Long Island and uses Yiddish expressions, just in case you weren't tired of all the other stereotypes ANM has used.
Pine Barrens makes me think of the Sopranos.
Her mom went from being a chef...to an editor at a publishing house. Is that a career you can just...transition into?
A lot of the stuff related to Abby's dad reminds me of With You and Without You, also by ANM (but actually by ANM).
Even Abby calls Emily Michelle 'Kristy's adopted sister.' That seems sort of...insensitive.
Also, even Abby gets all worked up over Watson's mansion. Doesn't she live, like, two houses away? On a street full of mansions? Something tells me her house isn't that different.
Abby calls Claudia's skin "creamy" and "perfect." Ew.
Abby's speech patterns remind me of Juno, except even less cool.
When Abby is taken away by the ambulence, Kristy is looking at her like a sick person who can't finish a job. And when she calls to see how Abby is, the conversation is "brisk." God. I know she's club president and all, but can't she ever think of these people as her friends? Or even just as...people?
Watson rents the following things for the carnival: a Ferris wheel, bumper cars, a whip, a tame haunted house, and a fire engine ride. Why couldn't he just donate that money to the art program?
I Love Lucy alert! Grape stomping reference when they crush the cardboard boxes. Because all 11-13 year old girls in the mid-90s went CRAZY for I Love Lucy.
Shannon and Abby's sister Anna hit it off right away, because they're both invovled with extra-curricular activies. Sure? Shannon's really intriguing, as far as BSC members go. I mean, she gave up a trip to France - by purposely failing a test - because she was having trouble with her mother.
The carnival earns enough to fund arts program in Stoneybrook for a whole year. I'm so sure.

Final Thought: Abby has by far the best headshot on the cover; Stacey has the worst (even worse than Mallory).

#55: Jessi's Gold Medal

2009-06-22T18:36:00.000-07:00

Tagline: Go for it, Jessi!

Cover: Does anyone else hear "Go for it, Heather!" from "Romy and Michele's High School Reunion"? I do. I've tried to do at least one book of everyone in the club before I repeat, but then I did two Claudias. Partly because I was so excited about my new books, partly because I didn't have any Jessi books that really inspired me. Jessi and the Dance School Phantom, maybe. I haven't read the later ones about her. Then I remembered that I also would need to do one of Abby's books, so that will probably be next (I don't have either the Shannon story or the Logan books...yet).

Anyway, back to this book. I wonder which one Jessi is? Also, couldn't they have at least tried to make the girls' arms look synchronized? That's kind of the whole point of the book.

Plot!: Speaking of the point of the book, Jessi is discovered to be a natural for synchronized swimming because of her ballet talent. She's partnered with Elise Coates, someone we've never heard of before and will never hear from again. They're worried that they'll embarrass themselves, because they've never read a children's book before, but in the end, because this is a children's book, they win. Oh yeah, synchronized swimming is a sport in the SMS Olympics, and in subplots, different members of the BSC are entering different events (including a boy vs. girl Kristy vs. Alan race). And because baby-sitting has to come in somewhere, they hold a mini-olympics for the kids they baby-sit.

Points of Interest:

This is the book that has the 'horses sweat, gentlemen perspire, ladies glow' nonsense that is totally not true. Ladies sweat; let's get over it.
Jessi is a born dancer. It's not conceited, it's just true. Just so you know.
Jessi's dad sounds like James Earl Jones. Cool?
Ugh. It's a hot day, and then the Ramseys have seafood casserole for dinner. It seems...heavy to me.
Stoneybrook has a sports complex with three pools, including an Olympic-sized pool. I have absolutely no idea in my head about what Stoneybook is like. Sometimes it's this tiny little town and then it has three middle schools and a university.
Claudia was wearing: shorts, a Hawaiian shirt, and sandals. Wild.
Oh, Alan Gray. I prefer Cary Retlin in terms of Kristy antagonists; he's kind of a bad boy, and Alan's just kind of a doofus.
Ugh again. Even though she hates sports (and gym! There's a whole book about it), Mallory decides to be part of the sports festival....because everyone else is doing it. BSC books are really all about group-think. My favourite one, Mary Anne's Makeover, is the classic example of that.
Dawn enters the Javelin throw, because she's so, like, offbeat and different. Yawn.
Jessi and Elise decide to get to know each other better after the competition is over. And then we never hear of her again. She just drifts off into the black hole of people who aren't fanatical about baby-sitting; it's a place very similar to the high school classroom where all of Zack Morris' ex-love interests are.
I thought Alex Kurtzman was the super-serious guy who carried a briefcase and wouldn't let people cut in line. So why's he participating in the backwards race?
Kristy wins the boy vs. girl race against Alan, of course. They try to make it dramatic, but...it's not. It's about as dramatic as the Lisa vs. Slater obstacle course at the Malibu Sands. Has there ever been a girl vs. boy race that the girl didn't win?
Speaking of no suspense, Jessi and Elise win the award for best synchro routine. I wonder how the rest of the team feels, being beaten by the two newest girls in the group. Take that, losers. Then Jessi and Elise decide to quit. So...everything is back the way it was before the book started. The end.

Final Thought: I really do love the (real) Olympics.

Mystery #11: Claudia and the Mystery at the Museum

2009-06-21T17:37:00.000-07:00

Tagline: What kind of crook would steal art?

Cover: Apparently Claudia, the art savant, has never heard of an art thief. Or the cover writer hasn't. Anyway, this cover...has a lot of look. First of all, the background is quite purple. My copy is more pinkish purple than this picture looks, with the reddish "Mystery #11" in big letters. Right smack in the middle is Claudia, in a look that's also described in the book. She's with Corrie Addison and Marilyn-or-Carolyn Arnold, actually I think it's Marilyn because she has the longer hair. Corrie looks like how I imagine a mini-Mary Anne to be. Claudia has the same "whuh?" look on her face that she also has at The Mystery at Claudia's House (there is no mystery, by the way - spoiler?) and also in the illustration of her in Snowbound.

Plot!: Claudia, who likes art, by the way, did you know that? Anyway, she's really excited about this new sculpture exhibit at the conveniently opened Stoneybrook Museum. While she's there with some kids, some ancient coins are stolen. Claudia decides she's on the case! With the rest of the BSC, of course. So while they do their typically stupid stuff to chase criminals, they eventually find out that the real bad guy is the janitor, and not the two-eyed man.

While they're doing this, Claire Pike wants to be a STAAAHH! And she has a video of her singing "Somewhere Over the Rainbow" that she drags all over Stoneybrook, trying to get herself discovered. Eventually, she moves on, because she's five.

Points of Interest:

Even though I just said that I hadn't read this one before, I totally have. The subplot about Claire and her 'Over the Rainbow' video was very clear, and I knew the basics of the museum plot.
Remember in Kristy and the Secret of Susan, how Susan is withdrawn but then plays the piano? Or can say the date of something? That's what Claudia reminds me of, when she goes from being barely literate to spouting out all of this random art stuff.
Don Newman, this famous sculptor, supposedly lives in Stoneybrook. For a small town, Stoneybrook sure has a lot of famous artsy people living in it.
Claudia really wants to go see the sculptures in the museum, so she makes a plan - that involves also taking Corrie Addison and the Arnold twins. I get that she wants to share art with these kids, but couldn't she just do something on her own? I'm going to have to start commenting on stuff like that or else I'm never going to get through the whole series.
If the BSC members were animals, what animals would they be? It must be Chapter Two time! Kristy = dog, Mary Anne = koala (?) Claudia = parrot, Stacey = jungle cat, Dawn = dolphin, Mallory = a horse like Black Beauty, Jessi = a dancing Lipizzaner, Logan = hawk, and Shannon = cat.
The museum is part art gallery, part science center, part interpretive center, all in one. I would love to see their mandate or collection policy.
Claudia's first list of suspects: a janitor, a man with one blue aye and one green eye, and a Brownie troop.
After like, two seconds, the BSC decides they're going to solve the mystery. Because that's normal behaviour for a group of 13 year olds.
Watson didn't give any money to the museum. I find that weird, but maybe he was tapped out after spending lots of money to take his stepdaughter's friends on all kinds of trips.
I really don't think I could care any less about the Pikes going shopping.
Claudia calls something 'super-chilly', which she explains means 'cool.' Lame.
All of the girls get really excited at the museum, thinking of all of the kids who would love a place like this. Can't they just like it for themselves without wondering what Charlotte Johanssen will think of it?
When Claudia talks about Don Newman's sculpture 'Daphne,' that looks like a woman and a tree, I always think of like, a woman's torso, but on a skewed angle. Made of brown clay. Having that mental image was one of the ways that I knew I had read this one before.
Claudia, thinking that Daphne might be a fake, goes to harrass the curator, who reacts about the way you'd expect if a 13 year old came in and starting barking about art thefts and forgeries. And then she steals papers from his desk, and for the rest of the book they call him a creep and a thief. These girls need to chill.
Speaking of needing to chill, everyone makes a big deal about Claire wanting to be an actress. First of all, she's five. It's a phase. She wants attention - she has seven brothers and sisters! Secondly, let her parents deal with her being disappointed or whatever. They're her parents! Thirdly, just because you want to do something for one day doesn't mean that you're always going to want to do it. I know that Vanessa is a super-poet, Mallory a writer, Jessi a dancer, Claudia an artist, etc. but other people have phases! Let her outgrow it - she's five!
Mrs. Arnold is taking her daughters to the museum? A parent doing something with their own children?! This is highly irregular.
The security guard tells Jessi that there isn't really any more security at the museum? Why not just broadcast it in case any other thieves have any ideas.
Claudia phones up Don Newman to talk to him about his sculptures. Instead of being somewhat wary, he invites Claudia and her father to his fancy party. That's similar to what happened to Mallory when she stalked Henrietta Hayes, isn't it, where she shows up at her house and ends up becoming her assistant.
A lot of time is spent on Claudia wondering what to call Don Newman - Don, or Mr. Newman. This happens a lot in BSC books. Maybe ANM wanted people to call her Ms. Martin when they saw her.
Claudia acts like a lunatic, dragging Don Newman away from his party, making baseless accusations against the curator, and racing into dead ends.
At the party to celebrate Don Newman's sculpture exhibit, the sculptures....have already been taken down. It was a one-week exhibition? At a new gallery? It seems really short to me - I would have thought they might want to milk it for a bit longer. Maybe they have a new hot Stoneybrook talent all lined up - oh, wait, no, the curator tells Claudia that they want to do an exhibit of youth art, including her stuff. Right.
The book ends with a pizza toast. Yawn.

Final Thought: I think Marilyn Arnold's cover outfit is a lot wilder than Claudia's.

Sidebar: New Accquisitions

2009-06-20T12:22:00.000-07:00

I have just returned from a very successful trip to my local Salvation Army. Well, it started as a trip to the grocery store but something told me to keep going. And I did, and I found:

Super Special #5, New York, New York!
Super Special #8, Baby-sitters at Shadow Lake
Mystery #1, Stacey and the Missing Ring
Mystery #2, Beware, Dawn!
Mystery #5, Mary Anne and the Secret in the Attic
Mystery #11, Claudia and the Mystery at the Museum
Mystery #26, Dawn Schafer, Undercover Baby-sitter
Super Mystery #1, Baby-sitters' Haunted House
Super Mystery #2, Baby-sitters Beware

All for the low, low price of $7.11 - which is not bad for 9 books. And these aren't usually the kinds of books that you just find, I mean, they're not the ones that I usually do. I usually get the lower numbers of the regular series, the occasional Karen book, a few Super Specials. But this was a good find, I think. There are even some here, like Mysteries #11 and 26 that I haven't read, and the Super Mysteries I find really interesting, because I remember them being more dangerous and stuff, but I don't have a really great idea of what they're like.

This inspires me to recap even more books, so look for these to come soon.

Super Special #2: Baby-Sitters' Summer Vaction

2009-06-19T21:42:00.000-07:00

Tagline: Good-bye, Stoneybrook...hello, Camp Mohawk!

Cover: I thought this would make a good Super Special to start with, because I don't have Babysitters on Board (here). Camp Mohawk one is a good one to start at, because while it's pretty silly, it's not flat-out ridiculous like some of the other ones (California Girls, NewYork New York, or the last couple). The cover gets the summer camp feeling across. I've always thought it was (from left to right): Kristy, Dawn, Jessi, Mary Anne, Stacey, Mallory, Claudia. But Stacey and Dawn aren't always easy to tell apart, even though they should be, because Stacey should have shoulder length permed hair and Dawn should have loooooong cornsilk hair. But they never do. Anyway, the rest of it is typically odd. Jessi is showing off her looooong dancer's legs. Kristy is short. Mary Anne, being all bent over like that, would be way too tall if she straightened up. Claudia's legs are so short that she can't even touch the ground. It looks like somebody kicked Dawn in the balls.

Plot!: The BSC decides to be summer camp consellors, because they watched some camp movie and thought it would be fun, or something. And of course, everyone in Stoneybrook also decides to send their kids there. So they go to Camp Mohawk and have varying plot lines:

Stacey gets sick and spends most of her time in the infirmary.
Claudia falls in luv with a Japanese-American guy named Will.
Jessi meets some racists but changes their minds through the power of dance.
Mallory dorks out with Jessi.
Mary Anne feels way uncool compared to the other counsellors, so she acts all schmoopy
Dawn gets lost while camping.
Kristy gets a makeover.
Logan gets teased because Mary Anne is his girlfriend.

This is the first Super Special with the 'classic' line-up that includes Mallory and Jessi. Stacey is still in New York, but she convinces her parents to let her leave NYC for this wilderness.

Continuity Fairy: The Super Specials always have random things assigned to them. Like Stacey - she's not normally a hypochondriac. And Kristy doesn't really care what people think about her. Plus, everyone is racist.

Points of Interest:

Kristy calls Stacey the New York branch of the BSC. God. Can't they just be friends without making EVERYTHING about the club?
Stacey's the one who makes it into a book, the one who is like, "Okay, guys, write down all of your experiences because I need a memory book!" That's another consistently dumb plot device.
She's reading Catcher in the Rye. Of course. Isn't it a little scandalous for a BSC member? Shouldn't she be reading some Paula Danziger or something?
Dekanawida is NOT A HARD NAME.
Sometimes I'm curious about the relationship Emily Michelle will have with her siblings when she grows up. I mean, when I'm thinking deeply about fictional two-and-a-half year olds.
Dawn watches The Parent Trap once a week? Because of the divorce? That seems...not healthy. Does Dawn ever get therapy? Even in the California Diaries? Mary Anne does, though, doesn't she? I have a memory of someone talking to a therapist of some kind.
Seven of the Pikes go to camp? (All but Claire, because she's too young). What? Do the Pikes come from money? Because they probably ALSO go to Sea City that summer. Crazy. Meanwhile, how awesome would that be for Claire, to have all of her parents attention?
They really sing the Bottles of Beer on the wall all the way there? I doubt it. They'd get sick of singing it and trail off, I would think.
Do we know Mimi's first name? Claudia writes a postcard to Mimi and addresses it to Mrs. L. Yamamoto.
But Claudia starts the postcard with: Hi, Who are you? So maybe it's not for Mimi after all. Maybe she's part of a random postcard mailing project.
Junior CITs is the dumbest part of this book. And there are a lot of dumb parts. You're eleven years old! Who wants all of that responsibility? Be a kid! Have fun!
Stacey got a body wave for her hair. I still don't really know what that means.
Jessi is complaining about everything: there are no black kids at camp. she can't be a CIT. Her roommates all have names that begin with MA. Wah.
Mallory makes Junior CIT armbands. Lame.
We have to hear everyone explain that the counselor gets a private area, and that Mrs. Means is called Old Meanie. It's not more interesting the third time.
Mallory 'haughtily' defends the Bobbsey Twins, and then gets accused of reading them. Instead of denying this or explaining she just has a good memory (or a general knowledge brain), Jessi instead insists they DO read the books, which they don't. If she'd said they read horse stories, the bonding that happens later (spoiler?) could happen now. Stupid.
Mary Anne name-drops Julie Harris and Faye Dunaway. Mary Anne is about the only BSC member I can see knowing those actresses, but I still don't buy it. At least it's not an I Love Lucy reference.
Mary Anne tries to impress the other CITs by revealing she has a boyfriend, but they aren't that impressed by Logan. Probably because "he's from Kentucky and is on the other side of the lake" sounds a lot like "she lives in Canada."
One of Dawn's campers just wants to read Anne of Green Gables, so Dawn calls her stuck-up. Yeah, take that, Heather! Reading is so uppity. Feminists like conformists, right, Dawn?
Ugh. Nonie.
Jessi and Mallory seem even more co-dependent than usual in this book. Between linking arms to walk places together and getting up early to say good morning to each other, they seem more coupley than they ever do.
Kristy claims she doesn't know what her name means. According to Wikipedia, it means "follower of Christ." Would that really not have been in a baby book? Kristin, in the 80s? I don't believe it. I also don't know why I'm choosing THIS to be hung up on.
At the 'canteen,' Claudia buys: a snickers bar, an almond joy, a mars bar, a bag of doritos, two packages of peanut m&ms, a pack of twinkies, and cheese doodles. I think she has some kind of problem.
Mary Anne calls it 'Lake Dukakis.' Ha...ha?
Logan compares writing for Stacey with 'The Diary of Anne Frank.' I usually love ANM's efforts to talk about real books, but this one just feels odd.
Rick, Logan's co-CIT, is WILD. We know that because he wears a Hawaiian shirt over his camp clothes.
Dawn said she's never met anyone like Heather - quiet, prefers to read, and calm under pressure. Uh, that sounds a lot like...Dawn's best friend/step-sister, Mary Anne.
Dawn's speech to the campers when she takes over as counselor sounds a lot like Charlie's speech when Watson and Elizabeth go on their honeymoon. Of course, it was a cliche to begin with: you MUST stay up late, you MUST eat junk food, etc.
I always thought that Dropsy was when you dropped stuff a lot. No, I'm serious.
Claudia has this weird speech about how her parents want her to marry a Japanese guy (probably), so she's really glad that the guy at camp that she hasn't actually ever talked to is Japanese.
For no reason (is it in the public domain?), Dawn's campers sing "Monster Mash" while on their hike. I know that Karen sings it in a Little Sister book, too.
I don't even know how to end this, because all of the non-plots have non-endings. Dawn is no longer lost. Kristy goes to a dance. Claudia falls in luv and then cries. The end.

Final Thought: I never really liked summer camp.

#40: Claudia and the Middle School Mystery

2009-06-12T18:16:00.000-07:00

Tagline: How could anyone accuse Claudia of cheating?

Cover: "Hmm. This is very odd." That's what I imagine Mr. Zorzi saying. Is that who it is? I get him and Mr. Zizmore mixed up. Anyway, while he's murmuring "veeeery peculiar...", Claudia is busy being all "like, I don't KNOW!" and Shawna is...looking kind of like how I imagine Shannon Kilbourne to look. As in, she's kind of dressing like Janine, but trendier. Speaking of dressing, Claudia's outfit is not outrageous. What Claudia wore was boring. It's jeans, a shirt, and a vest. With earrings. And her hair is pulled back. Maybe something wild is happening below the picture. But you know if they described it, it would totally be like, "Claudia was wearing another one of her wild outfits. She had jeans that flared at the knee into day-glo yellow pleats. She was wearing a man's blue dress shirt with white stripes all over it and her sleeves were rolled up to the elbow. Over that she had layered this funky brown vest. She had dangly earrings and her hair was all piled on top of her head. It would look weird on someone else, but Claudia was totally pulling it off."

In real time, when this book was published (1991), Claudia would have been 17.

Plot!: Claudia has been studying with Janine to bring up her math grade. She gets an awesome mark on a test, but then her teacher accuses her of cheating off of Shawna Riverson. Claudia knows she is innocent, so she sets out to prove it, through such great plans as breaking into her locker or saying words like "cheat" and "lie" over and over again. That doesn't work, so Janine goes right to the principal and gets Claudia another chance. Cornered, Shawna finally confesses and Claudia celebrates with cookies and cake.

Meanwhile, one of the Pike triplets breaks a window, but they won't say who did it. They are grounded and it's all uncomfortable at home. Eventually they reenact it and it's found at that none of them broke the window because they all did, or something dumb like that.

Continuity Fairy: Claudia isn't really dumb, she just...blah blah blah, or something. They are really inconsistent with Claudia and whether or not she has a learning disability.

Points of Interest:

When she's describing herself, Claudia says she has long black hair and almond-shaped eyes. Why would she talk about the shape, but not the colour? Oh, that's right, because she has to make sure we know she's Japanese-American.
The teacher is Mr. Zorzi. But he's just a sub.
Janine would be happy wearing a white blouse, plaid skirt, red cardigan, and flat shoes. Me too! Except I'd like a pair of pants, too.
Claudia's lucky earrings are Princess Di knock-offs. She's also planning on wearing black leather high-tops and a tie-dyed T-shirt dress. Hot?
Stacey tells Claud to chill out about the test because by the time of the next BSC meeting, the test will be over. I totally use that as a coping strategy.
Yes, Watson lives in a mansion. The rest of them need to get over it.
Claudia is surprised that Mary Anne is allowed to have a boyfriend. But does Mr. Spier even know about Logan? I know he must, and he knows they spend time together. Maybe he thinks Logan is just a friend? I haven't read "Logan Likes Mary Anne!" in a long time.
Claudia calls Dawn absolutely gorgeous. Bizarre.
Wait. She also calls Dawn mellow, which is absolutely 100% not true. Try Dawn Save the Planet, or Dawn and the School Spirit War, or basically any Dawn book.
Most awkward chapter two segue ever: "There's this secret passage in that old farmhouse, and someday I'm sure Dawn will catch the ghost that she believes lives there. I don't think Stacey believes in the ghost."
Claudia gets an A-on the test. Go, Claudia. Maybe you should listen to Janine more often.
Claudia's blood ran cold. Her memories had just been sold! Er, Mr. Zorzi called her a cheater.
Mr. Zorzi handles this really badly. He doesn't know the students, and they both have the same test, and he's just all "Shawna, I believe you when you say you didn't do it, even though that's totally what the person who cheated would say."
As if Claudia knows who Emily Dickinson is.
How much of an allowance do the Pike kids get? The triplets have to give up their allowance until the broken window is paid for. Where do the Pikes get all this money?
Mmm, tacos. Delicious. But it's hard to picture Janine eating a taco.
Oh my Lord. Claudia convinces her parents not to get involved. I don't understand why they have to handle all of this stuff themselves. Her parents should have been like, "No, Claudia, this is serious, and we have to deal with this." Maybe then she could have gotten a re-write and all of the other dumb stuff wouldn't have had to happen.
I like it better when Janine and Claudia are friends, like in this book. It humanizes both of them.
Claudia talks about being in her pyjamas. I wonder if it's that weird negligee thing from the cover of Claudia and the Bad Joke. Hey, look. Her earrings are the same.
Kristy makes Claudia's problem the club's problem. I could definitely not deal with all of these girls up in my business.
Heh. Mary Anne pretty much accuses Claudia of cheating, and then SHE gets upset. Mary Anne is totally going use passive-aggressive tactics when she gets older.
California-cool, mellow Dawn suggest breaking into Shawna's locker. When I was in grade eight, our lockers didn't even have locks on them.
Claudia decides they don't need a search warrant because they aren't looking for a pistol, just a note. It's all evidence, Claud! Remind me not to hire her as my lawyer.
Adam likes Al-cay Ipken-ray Unior-jay over Ave-day Infield-way.
Kristy makes fun of Susan Taylor because all she does is shop and get perms. How is this different from Stacey?
Dawn's sort of a badass in this one. Meanwhile, Mary Anne is extra-drippy.
I wish I could snark more on Claudia's strategy of having Shawna confess by saying the words CHEAT and COPY a lot, but that's totally how it works in old-school Perry Mason. And if it's good enough for Perry...

Claudia decides to stage a re-enactment of the the cheating, because just like last time, she won't cheat, but Shawna would. It's fool proof!
Claudia dresses as Ms. Frizzle as The Sea. Of course. And then she has to go to the Principal's office! Awesome.
Mr. Zorzi gives this strange basketball-is-life metaphor to Claudia before telling her she passed. Thanks, Mr. Zorzi.
The BSC meeting turns into a party. Wild.
There's this weird side-bar devoted to the Pike triplets' baseball-card collecting philosophy. Why not just end the book early instead of filling it with details like that?

Final Thought: For someone who reads a lot of mysteries, Claudia is spectacularly bad at solving this one. Maybe because it's NOT A MYSTERY.

#80: Mallory Pike, #1 Fan

2009-06-11T19:28:00.000-07:00

Tagline: Mal's favorite author lives in Stoneybrook!

Cover: Oh, Mallory. But we'll get to that. Meanwhile...what's with the terrible spookiness of the cover? The dark mailbox, the bare branches...the baggy jeans. Is it safe to ride a bike with pants like that? And her thighs look GIGANTIC. Strange. And she's riding around in a bike with a basket on the front, like she's Jessica Fletcher or something. If you're dying to be cool, like Mallory is, would you really want to ride a bike with a basket? Also, if you look really close, Mallory's lips are pursed into the pout of judgementalness. Which fits, story-wise, considering who big of a moron Mal is in this book.

Plot!: Mallory starts spazzing out over Henrietta Hayes, who writes a YA series called Alice Anderson. She writes her a fan letter (even braving almost being late to a BSC meeting in order to mail it), and that's how she finds out that H.H. near Stoneybrook! Of course! Mallory sends her a bazillion letters and is crushed when H.H. doesn't personally write back, because Mallory wants to interview for this ridiculous English project she has to do. So Mallory goes to her house and is all, "Don't you know WHO I AM?" and H.H. decides to humour her by allowing Mal to interview her, and then offers Mal the chance to be her assistant. Along the way, Mal gets the idea that Alice Anderson is based on H.H. or her daughter or something, because she thinks all FICTION is based on TRUTH and stuff. So she freaks out at H.H. for lying, and H.H. awesomely puts her in her place. But then they work it out and Mallory just goes on being awkward.

At the same time, Mallory tries to write a play about her family exactly as they are, because authors don't lie. And her family revolts against this idea of perfect 'Valery Turnpike' and her crazy family. So Mallory re-writes it and everyone's happy.

Continuity Fairy: A lot of the Mallory books are people dumping on Mallory, so that is consistent. And there at least a couple "Mallory is a writer" books, although this one is probably the most annoying because of the whole "all fiction is true!" thing.

Points to Consider:

This book, in addition to 'gratefully acknowledging Suzanne Weyn,' is dedicated to Summer Lynne Headley. Part of me hopes that Summer Lynne Headley is a girl that contacted Ann M. Martin and was all "why are you spreading LIES?"
Opening line: "I love English class." Really, Mal? I never would have guessed.
Mallory recounts meeting Amelia Moody and being too shy to say anything. I think that's in The Baby-Sitters Remember?
Mallory spends a lot of time thinking about what her book jacket picture will look like one day. This time, she doesn't want a picture at all. Jessi tells her she's better looking than she thinks. Ha!
The stupid English assignment is work 80% of their term mark. That seems ridiculous.
I do not like how they writer her as Mme. Noelle. Just write Madame. It's not that much more space.
We're all reminded about the time when Mal won Best Overall Fiction in the Sixth Grade. Sometimes I think that might be the high point of her life.
We get a detailed explanation of what a skip-it is and how to use one. Why not just tell us about a ball-in-a-cup?
Mallory decides to involve kids in her school writing project. Because between being a Pike and being part of the BSC, she doesn't spend enough time with kids. Whatever.
Mallory cries when she's finished reading Alice Anderson. because it's just so awesome. I'm crying and I'm only on the first channel.
She explains that Nannie moved in to watch Emily Michelle "during working hours." But at night, she's off the clock!
Who describes their friend as having creamy skin? It's disgusting sounding.
Mallory spends the first few chapters tripping over her ego, but everyone else is not impressed: the Kids Can do Anything leaders don't fall all over themselves for her, her English teacher doesn't like her proposal. Poor Mallory!
Mallory gets a form letter from H.H. and decides to stalk her. I mean, call her on the phone because she lives close. It's actually kind of creepy.
The Kids Can Do Anything Club: a boring plot device.
Some kids that Mallory doesn't know are in her play group. Haven't these kids' parents discovered the amazing wonderfulness of the Baby-Sitters Club.
Mallory, after reading HALF of H.H.'s books, decides that she is actually Alice Anderson or Alice's mother. I think she actually hurt herself jumping to that conclusion.
Mallory calles H.H. the world's greatest living writer. What about Marguerite Henry?
There's a VERY long explanation of why H.H. sends out form letters. We get it, Ann M. Martin. You're very busy!
Mallory says she wants to find out what happened to Alice (because she thinks H.H. is Alice and she is a stalker). And H.H. reacts like this is the most genius thing ever and she had never even considered writing a reunion book. Bull.
H.H. uses an electric typewriter, but not a computer because that's sooo high-tech. In 1994. I think even Jessica Fletcher had switched over by then (what's with all of my Murder, She Wrote references today?)
Oh, Mallory's play. With Ranessa, Ricky, Margarita, and the rest.
Mallory announces that J.M. Barrie is not considered one of the world's greatest writers. He's no Henrietta Hayes.
Oh my Lord. Claire is changed to Delaware. What is Mallory on?
Library shoutout! Mallory goes to the public library to see what is published about Henrietta Hayes. Mrs. Kishi, of course, helps her out, and Mallory freaks because she realizes that Henrietta Hayes is a big fat liar!
Mallory's efforts at directing a play suck. Maybe because she's, oh, I don't know, eleven.
Okay, I have to write this all out: "I mean..." I said shakily. I had to tell her. I just couldn't hold it in any longer. "I mean you're not being fair to your readers. Your books don't tell anything about your life. They're all made up.! They're lies!" By the time I reached the words "lies," my voice was shaking.
Ms. Hayes gave me that blank look I'd seen before. Then she drew her shoulders back, suddenly looking taller. "Mallory," she said in an even cool voice, "I have not lied. My books are not meant to reflect my life. They are novels. Fiction. I suggest you look up the definition of those words in the dictionary before you go about hurling accusations."
The phone rang then. "Excuse me, that's probably George, calling ahead of schedule," Ms. Hayes said in a formal voice.
With a final icy stare, Ms. Hayes went toward her study.
I think it's odd that Mallory calls her Ms. Hayes, even when she thinks she's married. Weird.
Ms. Hayes is her maiden name, she never changed it. I like Ann M. Martin's feminist inserts.
Mallory tells Danielle, a girl sick with leukemia, that the whole future of the play rests on her. But no pressure.
I would much rather be reading a Henrietta Hayes biography than this book. Also, I think of this whenever I hear of Helen Hayes. Thanks, ANM.
Nicky thinks Ed is the coolest name a guy can have. It makes me think of the Meg/Ron think from Family Guy.
If Mallory knew Matt Braddock was coming to the play, she would have arranged for a sign language interpreter. Because Stoneybrook has so many sign lnaguage interpreters who can come to an elementary school play, probably for free.
Mallory's teacher says it was the best project in the class. As if.
Kristy starts getting antsy because it's 5:05 and none of them are at Claudia's house for the meeting that starts in 25 minutes. I definitely could not be part of the BSC.
The beginning of Mallory's next book sounds like the most boring book ever:
Valery Turnpike produced her first place, saw her work with a famous author completed, and was surrounded by good friends and family all on the same day. Valery tended to be a complainer, but on that day she opened her eyes and realized for the first time that she was a very, very lucky person.

At the back of the book there's a contest to name the new BSC member: Dear Diary, I'm 13 now...finally in the 8th grade. My twin sister and I just moved her and this great group of girls asked me to join their baby-sitting club... I'd rather have one of the BSC dolls advertised a few pages later.

Final Thought: I wish Henrietta Hayes stayed around to lay icy smackdowns on random people from time to time.

#5: Dawn and the Impossible Three

2009-06-10T17:12:00.000-07:00

Tagline: Dawn thought she'd be baby-sitting - not monster-sitting!

Cover: Yes, let's start with the cover. Suzi's yellow romper looks impossible cute. Marnie looks adorable. But otherwise, this is just a mess. Dawn looks like the human equivalent of a "waaahh-WONHHH" horn. And denim on denim does not scream California casual, but I'll give them a pass because it's so early in the series. And the shirt does seem like something Dawn would wear, with all its earthiness and everything. But aside from that, okay...I know that we're supposed to feel for her and everything, but what are the kids really doing? Making faces? Leaving a block on the floor? Playing quietly by themselves? Maybe Dawn could deal with it if she turned away from the camera, unfolded her arms, stood up straight, and gother act together. At least in the new cover the kids look a bit more...impossible. But I'm distracted by the lamp that's glowing super hard in the background. What an odd detail.

Plot!: In Dawn's first book narration of the series, we join her as she's adjusting to life in Stoneybrook and with the BSC. But she and Kristy are passively-aggressively fighting over Mary Anne. Her mom, who is dating Mary Anne's dad, is driving her crazy with all of the disorganization. And she's sitting for the Barretts - who she calls the impossible three! Luckily, she and Kristy patch things up while swinging in a hayloft, Dawn learns to live with her mom, and after a child abduction, Dawn confronts Mrs. Barrett about her parenting skills and all is okay. Until next time...

Continuity Fairy: Mrs. Barrett is pretty consistent to how she is later. It doesn't make sense to me that Stacey would be Mrs. Barrett's bridesmaid at her wedding to Franklin DeWitt, but I'm getting way ahead of myself. The ground for Dawn and Kristy's sometime animosity is pretty well laid, too. And Dawn has a lot of annoying pro-health food rants.

Points of Interest:

The club is the most important thing in my life. I think we heard Stacey say this too, at some point. Maybe even Jessi, and probably even Mallory. This was why I could never really identify with the books, even though I loved them: I was never this dependent on other people. Not that I remember, anyway.
Dawn calls Connecticut cold and sloppy. But she also says that California has one season (summer), so I'm not sure she's a reliable narrator.
Okay. I was going to leave this until I got to a Mallory book (whenever that was), but since Dawn sits for the Pikes, I might as well bring it up now. WTF is up with the Pikes? At this point, they're all a year younger than the rest of the series - i.e. Mallory is ten. Okay. This book is published in 1987. So let's say:
Mallory was born in 1977, the triplets 1978, Vanessa 1979, Nicky 1980, Margo 1981, and Claire 1983. The triplets and Mallory I understand, but who has FOUR KIDS under TWO and then has another kid? and then ANOTHER? AND ANOTHER? AND NOW WE'RE ONLY AT MARGO. By the time Claire is born, that's eight kids under six.
Accoding to Dawn, Claudia is Japanese and beautiful.
Ugh. Dawn's going on about her house and its old-ness. Boring.
Aside from the whole "we're rich and he's poor" thing, why is Dawn's grandparents (Granny and Pop-Pop) richness never brought up? Like, do they ever take them on a big trip, or anything? Maybe in the later books or mysteries...weird stuff comes out in the mysteries. Random stuff.
Suzi and Buddy are introduced...and Suzi has a skinned knee. What a monster!
Mary Anne has contact lenses? That seems...unlikely. Is that a regularly mentioned detail? You would think she would sympathize with Mallory when she's going on about braces and glasses.
Janine tells Dawn that "continue on" is redundant. I think of that pretty much think of that every time I hear someone way 'continue on.' Thanks, Ann M. Martin
I find it kind of strange that the family member have to call and ask for a baby-sitter.
Dawn sympathizes with the Barretts because their parents just got divorced and their mom is disorganized.
Jeff suggest that they have 'all-natural frozen meatless pizza' for dinner. If that's what they always eat, why not just call it pizza?
Dawn says that their house in California was bigger than their Connecticut house, and they have lots of extra stuff. Okay. Why cart this stuff cross-country if they don't have room? Also, I thought their house in California was one level. This is still bigger than a rambling old farmhouse? And wouldn't half of the stuff still be with their father? It just doesn't make sense.
Dawn is 'deciding' whether or not she likes boys.
Shillaber twins shoutout!
Oh, my Lord. Dawn and Mary Anne - who get squeally when their parents are in the same room together - haven't even thought of the fact that if their parents got married, they'd be stepsisters. Like, hadn't even crossed their minds. Not realistic.
"I turned and saw an absolutely gorgeous young woman rushing toward us. She looked like a model. Honest. She was wearing a silk blouse, a sleek linen suit, and gold jewelry - not too much, but enough so you noticed it. Her hair fell away from her face in chestnut curls and she smelled of a heavenly perfume." I think Dawn has a crush on Mrs. Barrett.
I actually don't mind Karen that much. I think because I read the Little Sister books first and then the BSC books, so I was used to her. I have a harder time with the character of Kristy in the LS books, I think.
Kristy says that Watson isn't a cook, so he wouldn't have fennel and corriander. Why do I think that Watson is a really good cook? Maybe after his heart attack, when he and Nannie butt heads.
Dawn has a barn with hay but no animals. How long has that hay been there? Wouldn't it be like, moldy or something? It just seems unsafe.
Dawn wears blue jean shorts and a white T-shirt that says GENIUS INSIDE. Of course.
Heh. Mallory, who is usually quite well behaved, gave Byron the Bizzer Sign and he began to cry. This sentence is all awesome.
Mallory steals Marnie's brownie, because Marnie is allergic to chocolate. Dawn speaks crossly at Mallory and accuses her of stealing a baby's brownie. Poor Mallory!
Claudia's journal entry has spelling errors (shocking!) but is still readable. One thing I hate is how unbeliveably ridiculous Claudia's spelling becomes in the later books.
Mrs. Barrett is thirty-three? How does Dawn know this? Did Mallory tell her? Strange.
Dawn eats taffy?! But what about the sugar?
Bradford Court and Watson's house are three and a half miles away. I'm not up on my miles, but that doesn't sound like a lot of distance...?
Sometimes Kristy makes me laugh: "How would you say my grandfather looks?" I asked them. "Well, he looks very nice," replied Kristy. "This is the first time I've ever met him, of course, but I'd say he looks good, although his shirt doesn't exactly match his pants."
Mr. Barrett shows up and abducts Buddy. It's kind of scary. Mystery #4, when Jake Kuhn goes missing, is also sort of scary.
Jordan Pike bursts into tears when questioned by the police about Buddy's disappearance. Do all of the Pikes cry in this book?
Also, Jordan takes piano lessons (what?) and Vanessa takes violin lessons. I'm pretty sure these aren't mentioned later on. Where are the Pikes getting this money?
And then Dawn confronts Mrs. Barrett and tells her off. It's so Dawn-like.
Foreshadowing! The club discusses Mallory as a future member. It's like it was all planned ahead of time!

Final Thought: If Dawn loves California so much, why doesn't she marry it?

#73: Mary Anne and Miss Priss

2009-06-09T17:20:00.000-07:00

Tagline: Too perfect to play? Jenny thinks so.

Cover: The two pictures are pretty much the same, but shrunken, which makes the background look a little more...wild in the newer version. Also, Mary Anne is rocking the slouch socks and baggy sweatshirt look. It makes her legs look really short, and since she's s short person to begin with, she must look really short in person? Speaking of short, Jenny's proportions are really odd. And is Mary Anne left handed? She's wearing her watch on the right side, which is the way I wear it but not the way right handed people usually wear it. The blond girl is giving off a bit of a Karen vibe but maybe it's Hayley Braddock? And the one triplet is busting out with a "Yo, this is whack!" Whack, indeed.

If Mary Anne was 12 when the series first started in 1986, when this book was published she would have been around 20.

Plot!: Mrs. Prezzioso has started Andrea in baby modeling, which makes Jenny jealous. Jenny tries to get attention by dressing up, then by dressing down and finally by making messes. Mary Anne decides to confront the parents, but surprise! They've been paying attention to their child and don't have to be clued in by the babysitter. Eventually, Jenny gets a modeling job too and also joins the kickball team and it all works...somehow. Meanwhile, Mallory is feeling taken advantage of because her parents expect her to help around the house by babysitting but she's still not allowed to rejoin the BSC. So she decides to talk to her parents. Confrontations all around! And she gets to rejoin the BSC. And in C-plotville, the triplets run a kickball team and it's a mess, but the BSC helps them get it together and it works out, too.

Continuity Fairy: Mary Anne says that all of the Pikes have chestnut brown hair, except Mallory. I thought in the earlier books Nicky also had reddish hair? Also, there's a big difference between the reddish brown that she's described as and the carrot orange that she's usually sporting on the book covers.

Points of Interest:

Claire Pike calls them "flutterbys." Nofe-Air.
Mary Anne cries at Pollyanna. Among other things.
She wears clip-on earrings! Whoo hoo!
This is at the point in the series where Dawn is in California, Mallory had mono, and Logan's volleyball team made it to the state tournament. Is there a sport Logan doesn't play? Although I guess that's realistic, considering he's a 13 YEAR OLD BOY. Who has a state tournament for 13 YEAR OLD BOY TEAMS?
"Besides," Jordan burst out, "Mallory is only a year older than us. Why should she get to be on her own and not us?" Not only on her own, but taking care of other children! Why is Jordan the voice of reason?
Mary Anne does a lot of gasping in this book, like when Mrs. Prezzioso orders a sitter indefinitely. When I was little I always pronounced that name as "Perezzo." I always read it as Bryan and not Byron, either.
Mary Anne refers to American Sign Language as Ameslan. Sure.
Heh. Jenny calls the Pikes pigs, because they're playing in the dirt.
The Schafer-Spiers eat Health Loaf: meatloaf without meat, made with walnuts, carrots, zucchini, and tomatoes. It actually kind of sounds okay.
After sitting for Jenny twice, Mary Anne goes right to abnormal psychology textbooks and diagnoses Jenny as having a "deep-seated emotional disturbance."
A lot of the "Andrea is a baby-model" stuff feels lifted out of the Claudia/Rosie Wilder stuff
Ann M. Martin's vision of a career woman: "Ms. DeVries wore a navy blue linen suit with navy blue heels. Her collar-length blonde hair seemed to be glued in place like a helmet."
Mrs. Prezzioso tells Mary Anne that the money is going into the girls' college funds. How is that any of Mary Anne's business?
Mallory rejoins the BSC. Everyone pretends to be happy.

Final Thoughts: This book had a lot more chances to be outrageous but just falls kind of flat. Maybe because no one cares about Jenny Prezzioso.

#6: Kristy's Big Day

2009-06-08T17:02:00.000-07:00

Tagline: Kristy's a baby-sitter - and a bridesmaid, too!

I feel like this title needs an exclamation mark: Kristy's Big Day! But let's not get too excited - she's not the one getting married, after all. She's a baby-sitter - and a bridesmaid!

Cover: The old classic cover features Kristy in a very flowy, hippie dress with long flowing brown hair. Her face looks a little old for her, but maybe people in the 80s just naturally looked older? She's there with Karen and Andrew, her soon-to-be stepsiblings. Andrew looks like a short old man. The updated version, which is the one I currently own, has a brand new picture showing the same scene. Kristy's dress has all of the same elements (including the tied-to-match shoes), but looks completely different. More like 'Kristy,' I think, because she didn't really develop her inherent Kristy-ness until after the series had been progressing for awhile. Karen is acting more like Karen, running around the room throwing petals - white petals, in a nice detail, because she gets afraid when her white petals mix with the black magic of Morbidda Destiny.

Plot!: Watson and Elizabeth (Kristy's Mom) set a date for their wedding: the third week in September! But then various things happen that mean the wedding is going to have to be moved up. So it is - to two weeks from now. Kristy is still coming around to Watson, and now she's not happy about leaving her house and her neighbourhood so quickly. While all of this is happening, Kristy's mom realizes that 13 kids are going to be hanging around prior to the wedding (the relatives and friends' kids). So Kristy suggests that the BSC looks after the kids - and amazingly, they are available! So for the princely sum of $600, the BSC is running a day camp! They assign groups by age and plan different events. Not everything goes smoothly, and kids cry and have their clothes switched. But in the end, everything is resolved and the wedding goes off smoothly. There's only sort of one big plot.

While all of this is happening, Kristy is also trying to think of a gift for her mom and Watson. She eventually decides to give them a variation on a family tree, showing their two families joined together.

Continuity Fairy: We rarely ever hear about Kristy's family or her mother's good friends again, but I think they do come up, or are at least mentioned. Her cousin Robin must be on her Dad's side? We meet Nannie for the first time. Stacey loves (luvs?) Mary Poppins.

Points of Interest:

At the beginning of the book, Kristy calls Watson a jerk. That's pretty strong language for this series!
"Oh, yick, yick, yick," said David Michael. "Pew, pew, pew." Who says that? Why not just "yuck" or "gross"?
"When you reach the drinking age," replied Mom pleasantly, "then you may drink." "But Mom, a year from now I'll be going to college." That's what you think, Charlie! A year from now you'll still be schlepping Kristy across town to BSC meetings.
I'd forgotten that Watson and Elizabeth had gotten engaged at the end of the first book. I'd been thinking that they got engaged at the beginning. Instead, they set a date in September, that instead gets moved to two and a half weeks from...chapter two.
Do we ever hear how Elizabeth's trip to Europe goes? That's why their wedding changed in the first place.
Similarly, do we ever find out why the Perkinses are so desperate to move into Kristy's house?
Kristy asks why her mom is so worried about the money. Her mom answers: "Honey, Watson and I and Watson's ex-wife and your father all have various ideas about how to spend our money." Isn't there something about that sentence that just seems weird? I thought that Patrick (Elizabeth's ex-husband)'s idea of how to spend his money was to NOT spend it on his family.
Kristy goes to the Final Fling with Alan Gray, who is fifty percent pesty and fifty percent fun. Claudia went with Austin Bentley, and Stacey pissed off Dorianne Wallingford (best name ever) and went with Pete Black. Dawn and Mary Anne went out for pizza with their parents.
In the original edition, Lisa and Seth (Karen's mother and stepfather) were called Sheila and Kendall. That was changed for the new edition.
The pay for the BSC works out to three dollars an hour. $600 for the week (for all of them) sounds like a lot; $3/hour does not.
David Michael was voted best citizen by his classmates. He sort of becomes a non-entity in the rest of the books; this is his moment to shine.
Claudia wants to buy 120 bags of peppermints. Yick, yick, yick.
This book was the first time I had ever heard the name Maura. Or Berk.
Whoa! Karen's shoes are black with a strap; looks like the first cover got that one right.
Claudia's ring dings come from the STILL LIF AND PORTRITS box.
According to the BSC Wiki, Nannie's real name is Janet Taylor. Does that make Kristy's mom's maiden name Elizabeth Taylor?
Library shout out! Kristy and Claudia take seven kids (including Jamie Newton) to story hour. I hope it was a drop-in program.
Watson has three toaster ovens. For a bachelor. Who has his kids every other weekend. That seems ridiculous.
All of the parts with the kids are very boring.
Kristy's rehearsal dinner dress is an over-sized white sweater dress with silver designs woven into it. Hot.
Kristy's mom wears antique earrings (old), her dress (new), Nannie's pearl necklace (borrowed), and underwear (blue).
Okay. Morbidda Destiny might not be a witch, but she doesn't really have any social graces. Who appears at the front of the wedding when the bride and groom are kissing? To give them a gift? Was she invited or not?
Stacey got her pictures developed at a one-hour photo place. She's soooo sophisticated!

Final Thoughts: Ann M. Martin has gone on record with this as one of her favourite books in the series. It's one of my favourite books, too. All of the early ones are written in a much better style than the later ones - especially the ones in the later half of the series, written by ghostwriters. They're still fun in a different way, but in this one Kristy shows real growth. She's struggling with Watson and the Brewers. She's a tomboy but really excited about wearing a bridesmaid's gown. She has conversations with her brothers about what this means for them. The Thomas/Brewers are very interesting to me - and although it is near the end of the series, Mind Your Own Business, Kristy! has a really interesting take on the Charlie/Kristy dynamic.

#3: The Truth About Stacey

2009-06-07T18:22:00.000-07:00

Tagline: Stacey's different...and it's harder on her than anyone knows

Cover: This book, like most of the earlier ones, has been released with two completely different covers. The first one (at left), has Stacey breaking the fourth wall to laugh with us about Charlotte Johanssen and her crazy love of chocolate. Stacey, who is rocking the sunglasses even though it's November, is looking a little rounder than I've ever thought of her, probably because of the continued reminders of her watching her weight and the way the later illustrations show her. The layered green turtleneck/pink-orange open shirt is not doing her any favours, either. It's not very big city. She does, though, look ALMOST age-appropriate, something that cannot be said for the re-vamped cover (at right). She better not get closer to that window, or else she'd cut the glass with her cheekbones. Also, with her raincoat/patterned sweater/baggy cream pants combo, she looks more like a proto-soccer mom than a 12 (at the time? Her birthday's in April, as we find out in Mystery #1 where her birthstone is a diamond, so maybe she's already 13, but I don't think it's mentioned) year old baby-sitter. And her expression is so much more dramatic than the situation calls for.

Charlotte: Look Stacey, chocolate!
Stacey: {Goes into a thousand-yard stare of impending flashback}

Her eyes are dead. She looks like she belongs on a Lurlene McDaniel cover...about a college girl with a failing liver or something.

Also, what's she doing with her leg? It's strange. Charlotte is wearing high-waisted pants, but that's not even worth mentioning about this cover.

Plot!: Stacey has been hiding the truth...the truth about Stacey. She has diabetes. Except...don't we already know this about Stacey? I'm pretty sure it comes out in the first book, when Kristy goes after her about being on a diet. So the truth is...she's a bedwetter? She had a fight with her former New York BFF? She doesn't like her parents running her life? That's what they're doing, taking her to New York so she can be examined by some hotshot semi-quack doctor while her parents plan their next medical jaunt.

While this is all happening, the BSC is under attack from new upstart The Baby-Sitters Agency, fronted by Liz Lewis and Michelle Patterson, older sitters who can stay out until 11:00 or even midnight! But ZOMG, guys...they don't even like babysitting; they're just in it for the money. And they hire babysitters who let Jamie Newton play in the street without his mittens or his hat and who burn a cigarette hole into his couch cushion! So the BSC tries various ways to compete with the BSA, and in the end they have an old-fashioned showdown, which they win (of course).

And on the baby-sitting front, Charlotte Johanssen is shy and has no friends. So Stacey convinces her parents to move her ahead a grade, naturally. And things all work out in the end.

Continuity Fairy: I don't think we ever hear about Stacey's cousins Jonathan, Kirsten, and Cheryl ever again.

Points of Interest: In almost every BSC appearance, Laine and Stacey have some kind of fight (except maybe New York, New York, where Laine basically acts like an activities director). My favourite might be Stacey's Ex-Best Friend, but I'm getting ahead of myself. In this one, we find out that Laine and Stacey haven't really been friends since Stacey peed all over her. What was the attitude towards diabetes like in 1986? Because Stacey's parents sort of treat it like she has AIDS or something, with all of the secrecy and shame that they have towards it. But I'm kind of with Laine here: not only did Stacey pee on her, her best friend was keeping this big secret. So, there.

All of the BSC/BSA interactions are pretty hilarious, because the BSC (who have been in business now for like, six weeks) take it all SO. SERIOUSLY.

"Then," said Kristy, "you must know the kids pretty well by now. A good baby-sitter knows a lot about the children she takes care of. Do you know what Jamie Newton's favorite kind of sandwich is?"

Liz paused. "I only baby-sat for him once," she said.

"It's peanut butter and honey, toasted," said Mary Anne, finding her voice.

"What's Charlotte Johanssen's favorite TV program?" asked Kristy

Liz and Michelle glanced at each other. "Mister Rogers," Michelle said triumphantly.

"Michelle, Charlotte Johanssen is almost eight years old. Her favorite program is The Cosby Show."

"Have you ever sat for the Marshalls?" asked Claudia.

"I have," said Liz. "Two girls: Nina, three, and Eleanor, one." I really thought she was going to add, "So there.")

"Right," said Claudia. And do you know what it means when Eleanor rubs her ears?"

"That she has an earache?"

"No, it means she's getting hungry."

"Do you remember what Nina is allergic to?" asked Mary Anne.

"For heaven's sake, what is this - Twenty Questions?"

Exactly.

Final Thoughts: Stay tuned for my look at The Truth About Stacey: The Graphic Novel!

Welcome to Sheep Are In!

2009-06-07T18:19:00.001-07:00

This is going to be a new venture for me: a blog devoted to re-reading, sharing, and snarking the Baby-Sitter's Club series. Oh yes, there will be snark - but usually out of love. This series was huge in my not-so-long-ago childhood, and I am still drawn to it now, reading it with a different set of eyes. Anyway, there will be more details as we go along, so enjoy the ride!